#thesis-1

[elee-thesis]

See You Later, Alligators

Final presentation video above! Message me/ look on slack for the pw.

FINAL CRITIQUE

My crit didn't go quite as planned. I decided that, instead of explaining my concept from beginning to end as one typically expects in a crit, I explained very little and dunked my crits headfirst into my project. I was a bit sleep deprived from the weekend, trying to get finals work finished, and of course putting together this video. I only realized that my critiques may have an issue with only just seeing this video on the train ride over to present! I think the issue here was that I accidentally replaced the crits with my classmates in my mind, and almost expected them to have been with me throughout the semester. Of course this isn't something that I literally thought, but I think I failed to think ahead in terms of how much set-up I might have to do to receive a successful critique.

Some of the main takeaways:

It seemed that one of the crits thought the project was about data security which means that I definitely need to think about what limitations I can place on my project so that the thread between each "tool" is apparent.

Also I received criticism about using code when it *is* in fact binary. I spoke to Waverly about it and they framed it in a way that made sense to me: rather than using code, I am exploring cyberspace, which of course in order to do so I'm using code to run my own experiments in this sphere. I don't think my project is *about* subverting the binary of code, but needed to be made clearer that it's specifically about subverting UI, which of course uses code.

Having felt disheartened after my crits, I asked to speak to my thesis prof for next year. She really helped me come to understand where my work is right now and I formulated marching orders for the next semester:

Approach making backwards. Identify the sites of oppression that I am focused on, and start making based upon the mechanics that constitute that particular oppression. Figure out the internal logic of these structures and build concepts off of that research and investigation. 

Decide whether I want to focus strictly on superficial interface design, or the deeper infrastructure, etc.

Define the limitations for my project and stick to them. (See #2)

Develop the queer strategies that I plan to employ, taking example from my successful prototypes created in Thesis 2.

Overall, I was thrown a bit with my initial critiques but I also think I learned a really big lesson which is that, I can't expect people to read my mind! I really have to set folks up if I want a specific response from them, which I honestly didn't do. While I think much of their feedback wasn't super helpful, there are definitely nuggets of helpful critique buried in there.

 Advice to Thesis Baby

Lastly, here's some advice I'd give myself if I were to do semester 1 again:

I wish I had started talking to more people about my thesis sooner. My friends seemed really excited and *got* it when I talked to them about it, but I was so unconfident in the beginning that it took me a while to get heated up.

I went to 2 conferences this semester but I wish I had had the guts to go up to certain speakers and strike up a conversation, rather than just find them on Twitter later :')

Read more full books! I read a TON of work but I would sort of read snippets here and there which definitely became helpful, but I wish I could have taken in an entire book, rather than just a chapter or two. I'm not sure I actually had the time for this but one can dream….

Ending On a Lil’ Cheese

I think this semester went really well and I'm so grateful for the class we had. I have truly never felt this comfortable in a class setting and I seriously feel a little teary knowing I'll never get to have a thesis class with y'all again :'(. I think this just goes to show how the folks who you surround yourself with during the creative process is soooo important. Even if you love the professor, it often has to be about the combination of loving your professor *and* your classmates, which is really hard to get! But…we got it this semester <3 Sorry to end my post on an incredibly cheesy note, but I'm also not sorry ;)

[elee-thesis]

:Sweats Nervously:

The Concept Notes Part

Just kidding! I’m not that nervous.......yet. For week 15, I just wanted to add a bit of concrete direction to my previous post, since I feel like that post really contains the MEAT of the newest direction my project is going in.

As per my most recent blog post, I've been leaning into creating tools that allow users to subvert the oppressive system engineered into their tech, and provide space to explore the materiality of this technology, by pushing at the boundaries set in place. One thought I had: I realized that it might make most sense to create a google chrome extension that contains my final suite. After doing a bit of research on what exactly is allowed in the Google Chrome store, I noticed that apps can only have "one function" or if several functions they all must pertain to one main function. My "suite", of course, in no way meets that rules, so I’m guessing there's no way I can publish it on the app store. While this may initially seem like a disappointment I'm actually feeling pretty good about it having to be distributed via zip file and then uploaded as a "package" in the Developer Tools section of folk's Chrome Extension library. It creates kind of an interesting dynamic because enabling developer mode and loading a package from there opens up a ton of vulnerabilities to someone’s computer. This means that the person that want to have their _own_ suite *must* trust me... this is definitely something I’d like to think more about.

I also read a bunch of "The New Dark Age" by James Bridle this weekend and found an excellent quote:

"We have been conditioned to think of the darkness as a place of danger, even of death. But the darkness can also be a place of freedom and possibility, a place of equality. For many, what is discussed here will be obvious, because they have always lived in this darkness that seems so threatening to the privileged. We have much to learn about unknowing. Uncertainty can be productive, even sublime"

Using the darkness as a metaphor for the subversion let's say, or the chaos created by my tool set, allows for the opening up of this beautiful liminal space. Those that are familiar with these spaces, I hope, will recognize it as a home. I'm not entirely sure if this is how my project will be perceived, but it's something to work on never the less.

I also talked to a bunch of folks over the age of 55 about technology this weekend to glean some info about what their interactions are like with their computer/phones/etc. I heard a lot about trying to interact with a computer that is constantly evolving, and just when they felt that they had a grasp on the "latest" feature, etc, things would change again. Specifically, my mom, who happens to be pretty internet savvy said she feels badly when she sees all these folks on twitter enjoying memes or other online tomfoolery, and she wishes she could be more ~*~in on it~*~*. She said something about missing out on having online friendships. She said this feeling of sadness always turned inward; "is there something wrong with me?". I had never really talked to folks who felt alienated by technology because of their age, and especially when as of late, it’s become a point of contention with younger folks. So, I'm now a little nervous about my suite pushing people who share these feelings further into the shadows. I ended up showing these folks what I had been working on, though, and most of them found it conceptually interesting and also said how some of the "effects" of the tools I had created replicated ways in which they would "accidentally mess something up” something, which I thought was interesting. Specifically someone commented that the “click” chrome extension that I created that slid words of the page really looked like something he had accidentally done once. I'd definitely like to think more about their feedback...after all my projects doesn't have to do something for everyone so I'm hoping this doesn't add too much pressure. 

The Form Notes Part

SO for form: I'm thinking that I'd like to ultimately have a sort of "tool bar" at the bottom of my screen that pops open a box and provides a bunch of "tools" that folks can choose from. I'm not sure if this should become something that I continuously add to or not, but in the meantime this is my running list:

Cursor as Medium

Having bits of data from past browsing history that is "summoned" by one's cursor

Browser Shimeji

Aka Tamagotchi for your computer that roams around your screen and is cared for by browsing activity (TBD)

Shy Cursor

Having the cursor hide when you move too quickly (it seems that the shy hyperlinks prototype was wonky, but might be more effective with the cursor)

Blur/replace faces

OpenCV is my friend!!!!!!!!!!!! It might be ridiculously intensive to load in each image on a computer, detect a "face" and cover it… this might end up looking more like my mad face "click"

Random intervals of touching your computer for its warmth

Connecting with your computer and feeling how hard it's worked

Illustrate one's journey online

Visualize a little map of each link you've visited

Though I haven't actually made something like this yet, I *think* it'll be easy-ish to implement…

Close Button Death

Implement the naming and formalization of a ritual surrounding closing tabs

Word FLIP

Flipping words around on a page. I'd like to change how this currently functions because I think it might be interesting to parse each word from a sentence and reorder them (?) Something to play with

Reorder google search

There's so much blatant oppressive tactics surrounding the order in which google searches are revealed, I'd like to work on creating a randomizer that randomizes the links presented. I have no idea if this is feasible so we'll have to see :')

Ugly!

I'd like to work to mess with CSS styling and randomize what a page's style could look like.

SO my game plan is so mock up the above (most of them are already actually functional), or if it's easy enough, create real solid versions of them. Easy Peasy! Bring on the final presentation ;) I am feeling a little anxious about what I'm creating but also feeling fairly good about it all. We'll see how I'm feeling in a week!

Check out some mocks of the form below:

Before clicking!

After clicking! 

Version 1 of the tool set all laid out

Version 2 of the tool set all laid out

[elee-thesis]

Finally

I started off this week really feeling like I was at a stand still. I tossed around a couple of ways to improved my project but ultimately felt like I had "plateaued" with my work. Liza had suggested a week or two ago that I start to think about the overarching theme of my project, and at the beginning of the week I felt that I had determined that my smaller projects were about creating these entities that built this sort of human, less logical, less mechanized relationship with the human using it. To be honest, this to me felt like I was suddenly moving away from my original concept statement. My concept was all about highlighting the oppressive foundation of interface, etc rather than exploring the limits of human/computer relationship (even if that tied into my larger concept). I realized that after talking to Liza this week that I really needed to buckle down and think about my original intention and how it had transformed.

I did a bit more research over the weekend and think I landed on a stronger concept statement for my project. There’s an aphorism that explains that the purpose of art is often one of two things: "afflicting the comfortable or comforting the afflicted". While I think this might be a crude distillation of what art is and can mean, I used this aphorism to reassess my audience after having originally decided that I wanted to “afflict the comfortable”. I chatted with my partner a bit about my thesis and he seemed to think that these tools/this suite that I had built would transform the internet/interfaces/the computer into something strange, alien, and unexpected (perhaps the way a marginalized person would experience technology that was not made with them in mind). Thus, he claimed, that my project *was* achieving what I had originally set out for it to achieve. I then spoke to Waverly about my thesis and they were incredibly helpful, but also contrary to my partner, they thought that my project did the latter or "comforted the afflicted". They pointed out that my work allowed for this shift in data-laden spaces that created an open canvas, so to speak and sometimes literally, where they could imagine what alternatives were possible. They pointed me to this quote:

“Technology comes with an aura of fixedness: once immured in things, ideas seem settled and unassailable....By re-enchanting a few tools, we might see the myriad ways in which this realization is immanent within multiple modes of contemporary everyday life.” –James Bridle NewDark Age

I love the idea of my project as "re-enchanting tools". It sort of made me rethink my entire concept statement. While I originally intended this to be for an audience of people who currently don't have a problem for tech (those not marginalized), I think it also creates a space for people who are marginalized and struggle with current technologies that do not include them in their design. How might providing tools that "break" the fabric of these designs empower people who were oppressed by them in the first place? While I still think this suite might be interesting for folks that are *not* marginalized, Waverly pointed out that these people might just think of this suite as a bunch of silly/funny tools, and not anything to think more deeply about. I have some suspicion they're right, but I also probably would need to test that.

I'm really stoked on the progress I made! I *think* I want to change the direction of my project a bit and start thinking about how to create this suite for marginalized folks. I think some of my projects push this idea, but ultimately I'd like my final form to take on several tools that feel cohesive and specifically pointed at certain interfaces or design (on the internet or elsewhere).

This week, I plan to try and think more deeply about these instances of oppression, and write about them in all of the projects that I have made, and plan to make. I'd also like to make a game plan for which projects I'm going to include in my final, and how I'll tie their narratives together.

[elee-thesis]

-Upgrade Available-

This week I decided would be a week of research after having made a ton for my 7-in-7. I read a bit about queer theory and software design, the use of a queer interface in video games, and bit about disposability in design. It made me realize that I kind of dropped the ball on one of my initial questions that examined the relationship between humans and computers. I sort of forgot to think more deeply about that, and it might be important to try and create something that explicitly addresses this relationship. I think the pieces I've made so far reference this relationship but don't obviously point to it. On top of this, I think it might be interesting to think more deeply about disposability. So much of our design is meant to be "upgraded", while tossing the old design, be it hardware software, away. There's this notion of progression that's expected. What might it mean for our design to evolve naturally? Or rather to regress? I might want to play with this a bit.

I've also slowly, but surely, been reaching out to quite a few people but it seems that folks are really busy right now and can’t meet. I also went to a TLC party on Saturday, which probably wasn't the most conducive environment to talk about my thesis, but I pitched my thesis to a few TLC folks who didn’t seem too excited about it:'(. I imagine it was a combination of  the loud music and darkness that made it difficult to talk, but it still was a bummer! I'm thinking I might reach out again, though.

Lastly, I want to start thinking about what I might present for my project at the end of the semester. I think I have to start doing work on the underlying thread that connects all of my work so far, as Liza suggested. Once I can kind of distill this down, it might be easier to come up with the final form, be it a suite or something larger.

Hoping to end this week by reaching out to a few more folks and also continue to research and think about the questions I posed above!

[elenaleegold]

7-in-7 (part 3)

7-in-7 cont’d:

"How might a click express a change in perspective?" 

I created 5 google chrome variations on this. In the first, a click sends the text dripping down the screen. Text is no longer stable but, moves at its own pace downwards, increasing the window size infinitely. The second produces this dark, shadowy cast over the screen, creating a sort of horror filter. The third blurs the screen into oblivion, and creates these pretty cool effects once the image information can no longer blur the images anymore. The fourth rearranges the text on a page. Text is read into my script, and then reassigned around the page randomly. This one is particularly interesting because it really changes the layout on the page. In the video, I'm on StackOverflow, and its amusing to see people's questions become answers and answers becomes questions. Lastly, I created an extension that just replaces all images with an angry face. It's maybe a little less meaningful and just silly? It makes me laugh every time :') The videos are in order in the way they're described.

I think my 7-in-7 was successful to some extent, but I also really want to hear feedback from folks. Should I continue down this route? Are these compelling? Is there a way to shape these within some kind of overarching container?

[elenaleegold]

7-in-7 (part 2)

7-in-7 cont’d: 

"How might a cursors express mediumship?" 

This one was probably one of my favorites. The question is meant to see if I could replicate the relationship with spirits that a medium might have, to one that a cursor might have to "dead" bits of code, text, hyperlinks, etc.  It functions like this: the cursors grabs all of the text elements from links featured in the browser's history and they appear circling the cursor, moving in and out or disappearing suddenly. Every so often, a "spirit" will leave and a new one will appear.

One more post so I can upload all 5 of my day 7 videos!

[elenaleegold]

7-in-7 (part 1)

My 7-in-7 unfortunately took quite a while and ended up becoming 7 projects that I kept tweaking over the course of 2 weeks. Though I'm not entirely sure how I feel about them, I did enjoy making some of them. I'm still unsure if this is the right path to take, and whether this communicates my original concept.

"How might scrolling express loneliness?" 

I could think of a bunch of conceptual web "art" pieces that I could create, but I decided I wanted to anthropomorphize "scrolling" and create this creature that reacted to it. I originally create a few variations on this idea, one being a creature that needed endless scrolling in order to stay "happy", another that needed slow scrolling, and the final iteration, a creature that dreaded the end of a page. As you reach the bottom of a page via scrolling, the creature's mood goes from bliss to deep dread.

"How might input/buttons/levers express curiosity?"

I think that this project didn't quite achieve what it set out to, but it had me thinking about whether I wanted these questions to create these personified interface elements, or inspire this expression in their user. I had originally thought it was the former, but I decided to try to create something that achieved the latter for this particular day. In the following video, the property box that one calls up almost feels dadaist. The buttons don't make sense, the levers are meaningless, but the user is compelled to click them anyway (I think) to see what happens.

"How might a clock express stillness?" 

While I think this project answers the question, it's probably my least favorite/ the least interesting. A clock appears, and as the second, minute, and hour hand move, the remnants of the hands stay in place and eventually, after 12 hours create one solid circle with spokes, unmoving.

"How might hyperlinks express shyness?" 

This project ended up being a bit buggy. I wanted to create hyperlinks that shied away when a mouse approached them too quickly. In order to click on a link, you must approach the link very slowly as to not scare it away. While the link was increasing in size after being scared, it's rendered unclickable.

“How might screens express warmth?" A

Admittedly, I lifted this from my MS2 project because I really liked it and it addressed the question in a succinct way. I'm not sure exactly where this would appear, or what interface it riffs on exactly. It encourages users to touch their screen and feel for the warmest spots. The longer they linger, the brighter that part of the screen glows.

The rest of my 7-in-7s are on another post because I can’t add more than 5 videos on one post!

[elee-thesis]

Picking myself back up

Truthfully, I have had a really hard time the past couple of weeks. Some of you know, but I experienced a death in the family and have had a really difficult time dealing with it and being thrust back into work, especially in a creative capacity. This post will be short, because I'm still trying to tweak my 7-in-7 presentation, but I think I'll need some time still to really get back into the swing of things. I'm struggling to feel excited about being creative, but hoping I can try to channel my feelings into making as a form of catharsis. While I'll write a more detailed post about 7-in-7 later, I found that initially my 7-in-7 was horrible. I started it, was thrown out of it because of having to travel back and forth, console my family members, and grieve, and then attempted to pick it back up resulting in something that I felt utterly uninspired by. Because of this, I've basically been re-doing my 7-in-7, and though I finished last Wednesday, I've been tweaking the work for basically 2 weeks straight now. I think there's something kind of nice about this, and it has helped me feel attached to the work in some way, even If it wasn't in classic 7-in-7 style. I had a conversation this weekend about my thesis with friends who I hadn't discussed it with before, and felt a glimmer of excitement for the first time in a while. This gives me hope! I hope I can continue to seek out that feeling.

Lastly, I went to the computer mouse conference and was utterly blown away by the talks there. I'm really excited to have new contacts to reach out to.

More on 7-in-7 in detail soon, and a discussion of my role playing exercise with Tingwei. Hope to get these up by tomorrow or Wednesday.