Entry #5 March 21, 2015 1:09am
I’m so happy. Overwhelmed. Flattered. Blessed. After all those days and nights that I've cried for one person and for same reason over and over again...At this moment, I can say that, its all worth it. I've learned how to accept the flaws and mistakes of my partner. His imperfection, which makes him a wonderful person. And His love, makes me feel special. Makes me feel wanted. So romantic and real. Makes my heart wanted him more. Love him without any hesitation. Lil’ bit corny huh? Well, that's how i feel. And there’s no reason to hide it (even if, it means that the way i expressed my love is too munchy and too cliche -.- hahahahah)
Ej is one of the reason why i found myself reconciling to my father. He didnt know this issue because we’re not yet there to talk about it. And Im not yet ready to open this topic with him. I think its useless because we are both happy with our relationship now. I don't want to ruin the moment. and I think i need to let go of this bad memories of mine. Those memories that makes me feel betrayed by my father. The reason why i started to hate committing to someone, afraid to enter a relationship and to trust someone. But I met ej. In most unexpected way and time. I didnt expect that he’ll give me such a wonderful feeling of being loved by someone. Suddenly, im starting to fall for him....and then in days? weeks? months? I DONT KNOW.... HOW, WHEN, WHY but conquer those fears and doubts in my mind. I found myself loving him. Do some sweet and romantic stuffs. Saying those sweet words and making funny conversations everyday. At that time, im not prepared for some serious commitment. God knows im not! :p But i cant help myself to like him. Like there is some magical spell that saying, that I badly need and wanted to know him more. I wanted see his other side. The real one. And then i came and realized one thing..... At first, its hard for me to admit this but my heart surrenders..... I knew one thing, that is.......
I love him. And I don’t want to let him go. Not this time.
And that’s how our relationship continuous.... Even though it has a bad start for us. But in allowance of mistakes and patience. A days, weeks, months of having no conversation, realizing the worth of each other. And reassuring both our feelings for each other. Now, where in the stage when we finally know how to respect and be real to each others feeling. No secrets. Open to talk about any issues. Any problems that each other is facing. All the things that matters.
Now.... Its just real :) Finally.
If there’s important things ive learned in commitment and love? That is how to appreciate myself and my partner. Respect. and TRUST him.... that’s how relationship grows. I wish this love will remains forever. I wish he’s the one. If only i knew.....
PS: Kainis ang muchy ko hahahaha boset -.- Sana wag nyang mabasa to. Utang na loob. May nakakaalam kasi ng tumblr ko eh. Si hazel lyn T__T Barok english ko dito eh hahahaha. Corni pa! Baka kiligin kasi yun hahahaha Tsaka nakakahiya baka asarin lang ako nun. Baka lumaki ulo nya -.-
