I'm lying can't you see

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I'm lying can't you see
The only things i feel are intense, absolutely debilitating anxiety and deep soul-crushing sadness. i havent had a fleeting positive emotion in so long
i tell myself that i’m a high-functioning but there are days that i just can’t give a shit
There’s a strong likelihood that I’m either going to jail or being sent to the worst place on earth, rural Ohio.
why do i always ruin everything with my self destructive tendencies
I AM SO SICK OF BEING SAD ALL THE TIME
I'm done. I'm tired of trying and being hurt.