#this is january

[tthematics]

i wanna drink wine and dance in italian streets and i wanna twirl and twirl in sundresses until my heart feels full and my head feels a lil dizzy and i wanna lay on the ground and feel the grass kiss my back and i wanna fall in love with the way that my body moves to the lyrics of all the right songs and i want to look into the future and create this life where i want to get up everyday and live and do i mean really live!!! like shouting from the rooftops about lovers that i was never really in love with and about the love i have in my heart right this very second, i wanna shout and not be afraid of my own voice and the sounds it makes throughout all of my transitions; like fuck i’m really bad with transitions, i wanna shout about how life can be so tricky but also about how beautiful he is when he’s sleepy and mumbling and how sometimes i struggle to breathe when he tells me he is in love with me; because how could someone love someone who’s got all these emotions, i wanna shout about all the things i have done wrong but i wanna tell the world that somehow i will make them right, i wanna shout about all the good i’ve seen and the happiness i’ve felt and about all the people who have touched my life and made me a better person just by knowing them, i wanna shout and i don't want to be quiet, i wanna shout and scream and laugh and love. this life was made to be mine, i’m not going to apologize anymore. 

[healingsuggestions]

I’m feeling soft again and I’m realizing that I’m the one in control and I’m the one that can determine the extent of my happiness. I will not put myself in situations that make me regret my softness. it is okay to love people and it is okay to want love back and some people cannot give that to you and you just gotta move on and find it in yourself again.

[tthematics]

i feel something stirring inside of me and i wake up everyday kinda just excited for life. i have these big dreams and i have these things that i know i want and little by little i feel it all coming together. i am happy, i am whole. like here i am in the midst of great things and for once i just feel completely whole. i’m back in my stride and i have loving humans surrounding me and i feel like me again. i am making a home within my lil mind and i still feel everything so deeply but it’s not bad, it’s not bad at all. i’m here for this life

[tthematics]

I WILL LITERALLY BE LIVING IN ITALY IN 7 DAYS Oh my god

[tthematics]

your breath is welcome here, you can be yourself, i will always be understanding.

[tthematics]

all these feelings inside!!!!

[tthematics]

wow wow wow i’m really bad with change and i’m just a little worried but it’ll be fine! like most the time i would rather have everything in my life change 100% or like nothing change and like a mixture is what stresses me out. like how do i maintain all this when i’m 6 hours ahead and thousands miles away? like how do i not stress.