what is your definition of support? cause when I hear support I think of like food and shelter and basic stuff like that and I don't think that should be conditional esp since withdrawing that from people does very little to actually fix the problem or stop people from acting badly, but I feel like based on stuff you've previous said about shelter and food your definition of support is different
Ahhhhh that may be it.
To me, supporting someone is being there for them. Making yourself available when they need someone. Checking in on them to see how they’re doing. Maintaining open lines of communication. Letting the person know you have their back.
Basically, the opposite of “going gray rock.”
I think everyone should have food and shelter and basic stuff like that, actually. That’s why I think social safety nets need to be more robust, not less.
What I don’t think is that, when you find out Bob thinks about killing you a lot, you have to wait until Bob “takes an action” to go gray rock, or even begin to avoid him. You’re allowed to do those things as soon as you find out that Bob thinks about killing you a lot. (What you’re not allowed to do is say Bob intends to kill you, absent more information about what’s going on with these thoughts.)
I believe that’s not fair to you, even if Bob’s PD means he’s isolated often.
If you’re Bob’s CLINICIAN, you may have signed up to be around Bob’s ruminations on killing you, because Bob deserves mental health care and someone will have to provide it. But if you’re John Q. Random? You’re not ableist for having a problem with that.
(And it may well be beneficial for Bob to switch providers, at that point, anyway.)
