Thoughts #4 (?)
It’s hard to post my thoughts when i don’t know how to formulate them. And like, there was so many of them in past weeks, i don’t even know what i should write. But well, here i am again...maybe because i feel like i have to post something, since i can’t say i’ve been active lately. I still feel like a stranger in this world, like an outcast, but i’m processing it differently. Or at least i think i do. I’ve always thought of myself as a pessimist or realist, but now i think that i’m more of an optimist. Maybe realistic optimist, if that’s even a thing. You may wonder if i lied then about my “depressive” (it’s a too powerful word for just general use) thoughts, moods and melancholies i post about occasionaly. Well, i did not. I personally don’t think that just because someone is an optimist, they have to be happy, the word doesn’t even mean that. The thing which i believe in, is that there’s always a solution. And believe it or not, there always is. Although i don’t always like them. But tbh, all solutions have the good and the bad side. I tend to search for an all-good solution, but that doesn’t exist, and then and only then i feel hopeless. It happens with global problems as well as my own personal ones. I feel the need to think about solutions to global problems, and i usually even find one, but it just isn’t possible because of the nature of people. Same in my own problems, or problems my close ones have to face. There always is a solution, but that doesn’t mean it is possible, however it also does not mean it could’t be. So, as you see, this is my optimism. I don’t even believe in people, in the thing that they’re not bad in the core. They could do great things, terribly great, but look where we are. We are capable of greatness, but we are also capable of horrible monstrosities. And the way down always seems to be the easier one. That’s why the thing about human nature not being bad doesn’t really make sense, does it. But no, i also don’t believe that people are necessarily bad. Nobody really knows what we really are like, we ourselves do not. Then why do i even think about it ? I don’t honestly know. But afterall, this whole post is just about me rambling...look where we got just from talking about me being optimistic. I don’t even know what i’m saying anymore, it happens all the time. I probably won’t agree with this post tomorrow. It always changes, it always does. I don’t even know what i expect from you people reading this, like, will i be sad if i don’t get a like, or a comment ? And what in the world would mean if somebody even reblogged this, do they relate to me, or is it even possible to reblog posts like this with any normal intention ? Aaaaaaaaaaah.....who knows...it’s probably the best time to finish this...so congrats to everyone who made it this far with reading, i don’t know what keeped you here. Have a nice day~
- intp-the-thinker
