#thread: confessions.

[ceo-sam-blog]

Confessions.

INVOLVED: Samuel Evans & Roxanne Marshall.

TIME FRAME: Saturday, April 22nd, 2017.

LOCATION: Evans’ Estate; Atlanta, Georgia.

NOTES: Samuel explains to Roxanne what happened in the hospital. 

AUTHOR’S NOTE: Potential grammatical errors due to a lack of proofing. 

Samuel jogged up towards his large estate, he licked his dry lips as he pressed forward moving towards his gate. As he got there he jogged in place waiting for a guard to let him onto the property before he jogged his way in, he was going to jog up to the door, all the way, he told himself. And he did, jogging up towards the home seeing his beautiful girlfriend as he did. “Hey babe” he said tiredly as he moved beside her as she unloaded the car with newly purchased articles of clothing and shoes. He eyed her happily, pacing back and forth as he caught his breath. “Babe?” he repeated, as she continued to remove bags out of her new car her bought her without saying a word.

Roxanne gathered her things quietly, she went on a littler, well big, shopping spree with his Black American Express. She needed it, for he had been stressing her brunette hair gray for the past few days. Retail therapy had become a surefire way to reveal the stress and strain he brought on her. As he approached she ignored ever direct word he said to her. She was pissed off and she’d been trying not to really show however she was done playing pretend. She looked back at him at his final words and she said, “don’t hey baby me, I am still waiting for you to explain to me exactly what the hell that was all about at the hospital a few days ago” she pressed. She’d mentioned several times and each time he just danced right over the questions she had as if she didn’t deserve to know what was going on, or the full truth to the story.

Samuel sighed at her words and he rolled his neck, head falling back as his hands rested on his hips. He been trying to avoid this for a while because it was exactly a great conversational piece to have with the woman you love. Oh by the way I got someone pregnant, but not by any means did I sleep with her, but yes those are my two kids she is carrying. He didn’t know how to tell her without being sarcastic or sounding stupid. Samuel licked his lips again before he ran his hands through his sweaty hair. “Babe” she said again trying to gather his thought as he watched her completely walk away, shutting her car door in the process.

Roxanne heard those magic words again and she rolled her eyes, all her could ever manage to say these days were ‘babe’ and it just wasn’t enough comfort to offer up. She moved to close her car door shut before she walked towards the home, moving inside and up to their bedroom. If he wasn’t going to talk, then she wasn’t going to talk to him either, period.

Samuel watched Roxy and he shook his head as he moved towards the home. He walked inside and closed the door locking it behind them, he set the alarm and moved towards the kitchen. He guessed he had to talk to her about this once and for all because after all it was starting to affect their relationship and that was something he just didn’t want to happen. He was in his thirties and he didn’t have much more time to just waste goofing around. After grabbing a bottle of water and guzzling it down thirstily Samuel tossed it into the recyclables. He moved to ask his chef for a homemade smoothie before he climbed the stairs towards his large bedroom. As he entered he watched Roxanne as she unboxed and unveiled the Chanel bags, Gucci shoes, Prada purses, and YSL accessories. There was a multitude of things that laid across their bed and he figured just how they were purchased. “Baby” he started softly and gently. “Can we talk now?” he asked her. “He moved towards her and she flinched pulling away as he rested his hand against her waist.

Roxanne looked to Samuel as he entered the room and she continued her task, she was removing everything from their boxes and bag laying them out on the bed so that she could see all that she purchased before she moved to place them in the new home – their large walk in closet. As he spoke and reached in to touch her she said “no, not before you shower. You stink” she barked, as she moved around him. “Talk to me after you are clean Samuel” she said turning her nose up at him.

Samuel looked to her Roxanne as she went on about him needing to shower and clean himself before he spoke to her. He wasn’t really an argumentative guy, at least he didn’t try to be however she was getting up under his skin with her foolishness. “I want to talk about this. Because it is putting a strain on us both. Ignore the fact that I just jogged 3 miles and didn’t shower yet. This is a serious matter and I need to tell you this. The whole truth” he breathed out as he tucked his lips in moving to sit down in a chair in the bedroom. “Right now, Roxanne” he said quietly.

Roxanne looked to Samuel and she folded her arms over her chest looking to him. She squinted lightly at him as she tilted her head. Inhaling and exhaling lightly to him, she finally said. “Talk” it came out as a command and it was exactly what it was. She moved to sit on the edge of bed as she waited for whatever explanation she assumed he had concocted on his way up to their room.

Samuel sighed softly to himself, he ran his hands through his hair again before he shifted in the seat. “At the hospital we ran into someone, by the name of Mercedes. Mercedes Jones to be exact. We know each other because, subsequently she’s pregnant with my twin sons. No, we did not sleep with each other, no we don’t know each other at all to be honest, and no we don’t plan on being together – clearly because you and I are an item” he said as he sighed again. He looked to Roxanne “there was a medical mix up, somehow sperm I saved was implanted her to accidentally and now we are here” he said quietly as he searched her eyes.

Roxanne took in what Samuel was saying, she tried to make sense of each little thing he said to piece together in her own head what this all boiled down to. At his announcement, she looked to him shocked, she didn’t understand exactly what he was telling her but what she gathered from it all was that he had children with another woman all while dating her. But then she processed each intricate detail one after the other until her conclusion changed. However, she didn’t know what to really say to him at all. “What?” she asked him as she shifted on the bed. “That woman at the hospital is having your kids. Two kids?” she said raising two fingers “twin boys?” she asked him, her mind was blown completely in the moment and she chuckled. “Come on Samuel… are you kidding me?” she asked him seriously as she glared at him sitting right across from him, sitting calmly in a chair.

Samuel looked to her and he stood up on his feet turning his back to her for a second before he looked towards her again. “I just told you everything. Those are my kids. I never slept with her. And I want to be there for them. I made that decision and I am doing it for me, because I’ve always wanted kids and after all I was freezing my sperm for a reason. It wasn’t just a weird dumbass act” he told her. His tongue rolled over his bottom lip and he sighed heavily. “It is a lot to take in I know. And I should have told you a while ago to be honest. But, at that time I was not exactly wanting to be in their lives because I was scared about what people think, and how people would feel. But none of that matters! They are both my kids and I need to be there for them because…. one woman can’t do it alone” he told her outright.

Roxanne looked to Samuel as he continued to explain further what exactly was going on and she moved her hands to her hair tugging at it lightly. “Do you think I am just going to sit beside you along for this crazy ride while you bring two kids into the World with another woman?” she argued to him.

 “Yes! Because I can’t control the things that has happened in my life before you. But you are supposed to love me, flaws and all including the baggage that I have” he told her. “And if you were a real woman you would know why and understand why I have to do this. And you would respect my decision” Samuel said.

Roxanne looked to him and neck jerked lightly at his comment “a real woman?” she asked him baffled by her word choice completely. “How dare you!” she spat as she shoved him roughly in the chest.

Samuel looked to Roxanne for a moment before he looked away again, as she shoved him roughly in his chest pushing against him violently. He grabbed her wrist “stop, Roxanne this is beyond you. And you can deal with it or you can walk away. But don’t get in the middle of me, my responsibilities, and my decisions!” he warned as he pushed her back away from him. “Now I think I will go get cleaned up” he told her, as he moved for their bathroom.

[ceo-sam-blog]

Confessions.

Involved: Samuel Evans & Roxanne Marshall. Time Frame: Saturday, March 22, 2017.

[thesuperstarmercedesjones]

Confessions.

INVOLVED: Mercedes Jones and Samuel Evans. TIME FRAME: Tuesday Afternoon, September 1, 2015. LOCATION: Samuel’s Residence; New York, New York. SUMMARY: Samuel tells Mercedes some shocking news.

Mercedes pulled up to Samuel's home, she looked herself over in the rearview mirror applying a little more lipstick on her lips before she slid her sunglass off sitting them aside. She turned the Rose Royce off, looking down at herself as she pushed her breast up in her bra a bit more before she opened her door climbing out slowly. She grabbed her purse from the backseat checking her phone, texting Chris back as she walked up to the front door in her tall heels. Running her hands through her freshly died hair she rang the doorbell waiting for Samuel to answer. She was amused to hear he wanted to talk and she was also curious to know what it was about.

Sam held onto Elijah, patting the baby's butt gently as he laid him over his shoulder, his hand resting on Elijah's back protectively as he leaned over to pick up a few things off the floor, tossing them where they belonged before he walked back into the kitchen. Grabbing Elijah's bottle out of the microwave, he sat it aside, letting it cool down some. Looking at his little man, he kissed his cheek sweetly. "Love you little guy." He said to Elijah, chuckling as Elijah cooed back. Upon hearing the doorbell, Sam held Elijah in his hands, holding the baby out to look him over closely. "Mom's here." He said to the infant, checking his clothes over, before he grabbed the bottle and moved to the door. Popping the top off the bottle, he stuck it in Elijah's mouth before opening the door. "Hey." He said to Mercedes, instinctively, holding Elijah out to her, knowing that she would want to hold him.

Mercedes looked to Samuel as he opened the door "hi" she said back grabbing Elijah as Samuel held him out to her "oh, okay" she said holding her purse in the crook of her arm as she cradled the little boy. Mercedes held the bottle to Elijah's mouth as she moved inside "and how are you Samuel?" she asked him looking him over as she looked down to Elijah kissing his forehead sweetly with her red lips.

Sam smiled softly as he handed Elijah over before he noticed her expression and he shifted, stepping back to allow her inside. "I'm alright..." He said honestly. "How about yourself?" He asked her gently as he closed the door behind her. Motioning towards the living room.

Mercedes nodded at Samuel words and she looked back to him again "I can't complain" she said softly as she moved to his living room. Sitting down on the couch she lifted Elijah up removing his bottle momentarily as she sat her purse aside. She leaned him back into her arms and returned the bottle to his mouth before he could began fussing.

Sam nodded slowly as he walked behind Mercedes to the living room, his eyes slowly rolling over her from behind. Biting down on his lip, he sat down on the couch as well, rubbing the back of his neck as he tried to figure out how to say what he needed to say.

Mercedes looked to the blonde again, gazing at him before her gaze dropped back to their son "so what's up?" she asked looking around awkwardly before she looked back down watching the child eat.

Sam licked his lips, sighing out. "Well..." He trailed off, not even sure why he was nervous. They weren't together anymore. However, he knew she would still be hurt and for that fact along, he regretted it. "Do you remember... Andrea?" He asked her. "My assistant... well... my old assistant?"

Mercedes looked to him, his words drawing her back in completely at the mention of the girl who practically ruined their relationship. She nodded encouraging him to go on "yes" she breathed looking to him.

Sam watched her reaction and he looked down, rubbing the back of his neck even more, sweat forming on his brow from pure nervous energy. "Well... she and her partner, Paige..." He sighed out, slowly looking up at Mercedes again. "They were looking for a sperm donor..." He trailed off.

Mercedes tilted her head to the side and she squinted one eye in confusion, licking her red stained lips slowly she took in his demeanor and waited for him to speak again.

"And... they approached me about being just that..." Sam told her honestly with bated breath. "At first I said no... but... Paige eventually talked me into it..." He said just above a whisper. "So... now..." He trailed off again. "Andrea is pregnant."

Mercedes looked to him and a wide smirk grazed her lips, her mind raced with a number of things and she looked to Elijah stroking his plump cheeks as she exhaled slowly. "And you want to know what I think?" she finally said after many minutes had gone by. She looked back up at him with piercing brown eyes, eyes harden so hard they practically pierced his green ones. But she counted despite her anger from ten to one, and one to ten over and over in her head like she practiced in therapy and the more she did the calmer she got, the less tension was on her face and her body relaxed as she blinked slowly.

Sam got extremely quiet as he gazed at Mercedes, feeling the anger slowly bubbling up in her eyes. Swallowing hard, he tucked his lips in before he looked down, nodding slowly, almost like a child.

"I am happy for you" Mercedes smiled "that was very big of you, to help someone in their time of need. I commend you for it. It's quite heroic...superman" she said to him gently as she looked back down to Elijah.

Sam rubbed his fingers through his short hair, tugging lightly. "I uh... I won't be in the child's life at all." He told her gently. "I even got rid of her and hired a new assistant so that there would be no confusion." He whispered gently. "I uh... I just thought I should tell you." He told her.

Mercedes nodded "okay" she said to him nodding her head despite her emotions, and her very emotions were what caused her to not meet his gaze any further.

Shifting on the couch lightly, Sam cleared his throat. "I uh... I kind of regret the decision." He went on in a soft-tone. "Because... I know now that if there was even a sliver of a chance of us getting back together before..." He sighed. "That door has completely closed now." He said knowingly. "So I uh... I just wanted to give you these..." He said pulling the two necklace boxes from his pocket and sitting them on the couch between them.

Mercedes looked on, swallowing hard as she did she watched him pull out the jewelry boxes sitting them down. Mercedes exhaled slowly again as she looked off from him. To think she had given up her relationship with Christopher to pursue something with Samuel only to be bombarded with this. She waited until Elijah finished his bottle completely and she kissed his lips lifting him up to burp him. "You shouldn't have" she said to him gently "you really shouldn't have."

Sam nibbled his lip gently as he watched her shift Elijah to burp him and he smiled softly at his little boy before his smile drifted away. "I know but... I wanted to."

Mercedes looked down at the boxes as she continued to burp their son, once Elijah did she leaned him back in her lap watching a drifted off slowly heavy eyes blinked slowly as he gurgled slightly. She opened both boxes and looked to the necklaces "you really shouldn't have" she said as her fingers caressing the pieces of jewelry.

Sam licked his lips, listening to Elijah as he burped. Gazing at his son, he bit his lip gently, watching on his eyes drooped shut. Letting out a sigh, Sam watched Mercedes open the boxes and he held his breath. "I... just... please take them." He whispered to her gently.

Mercedes looked up at him "cut the crap Samuel" she said shaking her head "you don't have to give me a performance okay. Elijah will still see you and everything will be just as it was before you told me. I’m not going to fly off the handle and doing something crazy" she told him as she closed the boxes back. She continued to count in her head ringing in her emotions after all if she did cry like she urgently wanted to he would have gotten exactly what he wanted.

Sam was slightly taken back by Mercedes as he chewed on his lip. "I'm not playing any performance." He told her honestly, rubbing his fingers through his hair, tugging at it again. "I... I'm being genuine." He told her softly.

Mercedes continued to gaze at Samuel "you know you dead wrong" she said lowly "how could you do that to me Samuel?"

Sam nodded slowly. "I know..." He sighed out dropping his head into his hands. "I'm sorry." He breathed. "I... I-I completely fucked up."

"I mean fuck me" Mercedes said outright as another thought occurred "fuck me, what about our kids?" she asked him as she moved to get up with Elijah. "I can't do this with you, because when I...when I do things that you don't understand I am crazy. But what are you when you do things like this?" she asked. "I warned you about her!" she yelled.

Sam kept his gaze on the floor, looking down as Mercedes chastised him and he frowned deeply. "I..." He paused realizing he honestly has no words to explain himself or try to justify his actions. He was completely and utterly dead wrong. "I'm crazy." He breathed.

Mercedes shook her head at him she didn't have any more words left to say to him "I can't stand to even look at you Sam" she said her voice wavering. "Can you get his things so I can go please..." she breathed out looking down at the ground as she held Elijah close to her.

Sam looked up at her slowly, nodding his head as he stood and moved to get Elijah's stuff from upstairs. Sniffling softly, he stuffed the items into the bag before he walked back downstairs holding the bag out to her as he wiped his nose with his freehand.

Mercedes waited for Samuel and she grabbed her purse off of his couch leaving his gifts behind. When he returned she wiped a stray tear away, grabbing their son's bag from him without looking towards him at all. She turned to his front door prepared to walk out of it.

Sam sat down on the couch as she took the bag and he stared down at the necklaces on the couch before he dropped his head into his hands again, feeling horrible for his decisions.

"If you told her no, before. What made you change your mind?" Mercedes asked him knowingly as she turned back around.

Sam looked up at her slowly, the sadness in his eyes apparent. "Chris..."

Mercedes held Elijah and she chuckled despite herself, she offered his a hardy laugh as she tilted her head. "The funny thing about change is the people who have so much to say about you character is always the last to see it...." she told him.

Sam gazed at her, his eyes red and watery as she spoke and he looked down again.

"I was coincidentally your sex crazed, crazy, whore, of a fiancée. That you must've thought was sleeping with Christopher Brown. Well Samuel baby contrary to what you believe I am not a whore and I have not and will not sleep with Christopher" Mercedes told him matter-of-factly. "And you should stop shedding your tears, tears never worked for you so I can only give you back the same treatment" she told him truthfully.

Sam listened to Mercedes and he shook his head slowly as she spoke, biting his lip hard. "Just seeing you two together period..." He said honestly. Sure he thought she slept with him, but that wasn't the driving force behind his actions. He was seeing her with another man all together. Sniffling softly, he just stayed quiet.

"If you wanted me you should have said something" Mercedes said as she moved to open his door walking out of the house and towards her car.

Sam looked up at her again. "I'm saying something now." He said as he stood up, slowly following behind her outside.

Mercedes ignored Samuel as she moved to put Elijah in her car, resting the sleeping child in his car seat before she turned around. "Because you saw me with another man...." she added. "That's so selfish...to do things to spite me. To bring unhappiness into my life because you lost yours...you let me go Samuel you let me leave. You didn't fight for me like I fought for you and damn sure turned your back. You pushed me aside..." she told him.

Sam stood beside the car as Mercedes sat Elijah down in his car seat and he sniffled again quietly as he listened to her, rubbing the back of his neck softly. "Our break up was mutual 'Cedes..." He said softly. "We agreed that we needed to be apart..." He whispered.

"And the cold shoulder after that?" Mercedes asked him as she folded her arms over her chest. "I was trying to get myself together for you" she said as tears began to roll, quickly she wiped them away. "And if we agreed why are you crying to me now? Why are you trying to throw guilt my way over having a new love interest?" she asked. "Because there should have been no way I had gotten over you that quick? The mother of your children? Your high school sweetheart?" she asked as she looked back to their son. "You have your demons too, but they were never talked about...it was always Mercedes. So if that is the case and if you are freed from the one thing that was bringing you down. You shouldn't be crying to it, you should feel no love towards me at all" she said honestly. "I never understood how you claim to have been loving me all the while playing house, but when we started to build a home of our own you put work and outside people's opinion before me. How is that possible, the love you claimed you harbored should have been enough to bring you home. To fight for me."

Sam listened to Mercedes, rubbing under his eyes a little. "Cold shoulder?" He questioned gently, unsure of what she was talking about. Yes, they haven't spokenlately but he never gave her the cold shoulder. He even asked if it was okay if he came over and actually spent time at her place whenever Erin wanted to go to Mercedes' house. Despite that, he got quite again, letting her finish and he looked down, sucking up his tears. "Just because it was mutual didn't mean it didn't hurt Mercedes." He breathed out, his throat cracking slightly as he shook his head. "You asked why and I told you... I'm not trying to guilt you into anything I'm just telling you the truth..." He sighed out honestly, rubbing his nose a little. "I know... and I'm working on them just as you are..." He admitted, looking down again. He knew that he had made mistakes and in a sense it did push her away being more focused on his work than her, but he was trying to build a name for himself to buy her, her house, and everything she was asking for. He was working hard to take care of her, though he knew that she could take care of herself. Rubbing his hand down his face, he looked up at her with sad eyes. There was nothing more that he could say. "I'm so sorry Mercedes. I love you... believe it or not. I love you. I've made mistakes. I can admit that. I know I've hurt you from the stupid things that I have done but I still love you and I want nothing more than to see you happy... so... if..." He trailed off gently. "If Chris makes you happy now... then..." He shoved his hands into his pockets, keeping his eyes on the ground.

Mercedes looked to Samuel again, she sighed exhaling slowly once more she had started the counting back up in her head and when he was done she waited for a few second before she spoke. "I love you too" she said easily. "And I am not with Christopher, he was going to propose and I ended things before he had the chance" she told him as she moved to fasten Elijah's seatbelts so that she could leave.

Sam slowly looked back up at her words and he sighed out deeply. Nodding slowly, he backed away from the car, staring down at the ground again. "Be safe..." he whispered.

Mercedes closed Elijah's door before she climbed into the front seat ignoring his last comment "no you be safe" she replied as she started the car up slamming the door shut, backing out of the driveway and speeding off down the street.

[mrsbeajones]

Confessions.

INVOLVED: Mercedes Jones and Joey Hart. TIME FRAME: Tuesday Afternoon, June 30, 2015. LOCATION: Christian’s House; Houston, Texas. SUMMARY: Mercedes speaks with her therapist.

Bea shifted on the couch in Samuel’s home office, she looked around before her eyes fell back on her therapist. “How has it been with you trying to communicate with Clara?” the man asked and Bea licked her lips moving her hands into her lap. “Hard. I know she thinking about the situation at all times and I know there is always this point and time in the day that she clearly wants to talk to me but she doesn’t” Bea said truthfully and the man scribbled something down on his notepad before he nodded to her. “Have you been able to physically talk about the situation yourself?” he said and she shook her head. She didn’t like talking about it, even with him she didn’t talk about what she did in full. “Have you thought to yourself that maybe she has tried to reach out to you about it, in her own way, but because you have basically programmed yourself to not think or talk about it you don’t see it?” he asked her. Bea sighed looking off as she did, she shifted in her seat again before she ran her hands through her hair. Shrugging she looked back up to the man blinking slowly.

“You murdered someone” the therapist said outright “I have to be bias but that is factual. You have to admit the truth in order to survive in court. You have to talk and you have to open up. Elias and I have no doubt they are going to put you on the stands Mercedes, and they will grill you to death. Because you don’t remember and I am here to bring those memories back to you, rather they are hard to imagine or not. So that they won’t trip you up or paint you as something you are not. And they will try” he told her scribbling something down before he looked back up. “You cannot not talk and refuse to talk about it because I have come to the conclusion that…” he paused sighing “you know what you did and you remember it all. You remember just fine” he said and Mercedes looked down her chin quivering slightly as she sniffled shaking her head at the man. “I don’t” she breathed a shaky breath. “The guilt is killing you and ultimately will destroy you in you let it…you have to be truthful” he told her. “This is all confidential. I don’t doubt it that in that very moment, in that precise moment you completely forgot about everything around you. It is possible but I think you have remembered by now” he told her.

“We talk to Clara of course and her therapist. She says you have nightmares all the time. That you sit in one spot all day you aren’t like yourself….it is tearing you up. So let it go. What the court doesn’t know won’t hurt them…you said you blacked out. You blacking out will go to trial. But the information you give me in here can help Elias one-hundred percent” he said and Mercedes sniffled hard looking to him as she wiped her tears. He handed her the box of tissues and she gladly accepted the white towelettes, wiping her face and nose with them. Mercedes exhaled slowly “I went to visit in at his job. I drove up to the church, I don’t even think I noticed any cars around I was too focused on confronting him about something totally different…” she said gazing at an object behind the therapist. “I walked through the dark church, there were no lights on which caught me by surprise but I didn’t think anything of that either. He was there alone so why waste the power?” she questioned as she wiped her face again.

“I walked down the fall having gone through the pulpit and I noticed that his office door was closed which was unusual for him. The office was far from all other things…the door was always open as a precaution. I pushed the door open” she said as more tears fell. “He and the deacon of the church were indulging in oral….stimulation, they were basically having sex in his office. I was baffled; disgusted mostly” she said and the older guy nodded scribbling quickly as he did. “I couldn’t move from my spot, it was like I was frozen in time. I couldn’t look away even though it burned my eyes to watch and I think I finally spoke. Startling them both and Donovan jumped up to come for me. I just ran….in my heels I took off towards my car. I didn’t want him near me, but at that point of time I wasn’t angry” she said quickly. “I was just shocked beyond belief… I could not process it all. I made it to my car jumped in and sped off even though he chased me I didn’t let him come close to me.”

The therapist nodded his head taking note of the story she was telling before he looked to her, her demeanor had changed from that of a scared woman to a bitter one. He looked her over, having remembered Clara saying that Mercedes had started to act like two different people recently. She was in raged, because of her situation and the fact that she couldn’t fix this for herself like she had come accustomed to doing. His eyes dropped to the fist balling the tissue up and he played on this anger to get the real truth out of her, for her sake nonetheless. “And what happened next? As you drove?” he asked her and she looked to him eyes dark. “I started to think” she chuckled bitterly “thinking…sitting alone, by yourself and really thinking on things” she tapping her head her free hand. “Thinking is what triggers your anger” she said lowly. “I thought about the danger he was putting not just himself but my family in. I thought about me mostly, the humiliation of it all and the carelessness. He could have given me something, I mean…I was with Sam and then there was this and his nasty ass” she growled chest rising and falling. Her therapist looked to her slightly taken back “so Samuel…he played…” he said being cut off by Mercedes.

“He plays a bigger part then I will let him or anyone else know….”Mercedes said and her therapist scribbled against the pad roughly. “I find myself treating him like I did Donovan….he has taken his place. Maybe that’s what I wanted” she said and her therapist lift his head slowly not knowing what to say to the confession. “The story” he breathed to her softly and she looked off into the distance again “I drove and drove…no true destination. I was going to go to Samuel’s job but I didn’t find it appropriate at all. So I just drove until it was time for me to get Clara and I did. I picked her up from her private school and drove her to our home. I remember her being so shocked because I wasn’t forcing her to go to any of her practices that day. Instead I took her home and we spent our whole day packing up our things and filling the trunk and car with them” she sighed. “Then I fucked up, I fucked up because I stayed. I shouldn’t have stayed I should have left that day but the thought of a hotel or even my sister’s hadn’t crossed my mind, I don’t know why. I stayed and I made her sleep in her room” Bea said shaking her head at the thought.

“In the back of my mind I knew I should have left and I maybe even knew he was doing that to her, I don’t know. I don’t know if I did or not” she him looking back to the floor. “I don’t know…I just woke up in the middle of the night to him in her bed with her. My instinct wasn’t even to go get her it was to kill him. All of the anger I felt came rushing back” she said lowly “looking at him looking at me in the dark, room her panties on the ground. I lost it, but I didn’t black out. I stabbed him forty-seven times with all the intention of killing him. Yes when it was over I shocked even myself but he had it coming. If it were not for Clara those officers would still be searching for the body that I would have delicately cut up and cooked. Served to all of my chickens, pigs, horses, and the dog on the farm. He would have been shitted out all over my lawn and used as fertilizer to grow the roses in my garden” Bea said and her therapist eyes grew wide as his mouth opened slightly, he sat his pen down against his notepad as he gazed at her.

“He deserved to die, he was a horrible man and a horrible father to Clara…husband to me” Bea said and her therapist looked down rubbing his forehead slightly as he grabbed his pen again moving to write something down but he didn’t even know how to take note of what she had just confessed. “Give me a second Beatrice please” the therapist said and he stood up sitting his notepad down and he licked his lips as he walked out of the office and towards Elias whom waited downstairs for the session to be over. Bea looked to the man as he walked out and she sat her tissue aside as she moved to grab his notepad, she wanted to know like countless people who saw a therapist, what were they writing? She looked to the page to see ‘Psychiatric Hospital/Care’ at the top of the page with several lines drawn under it. She sighed closing her eyes before she read on reading something Clara had told her therapist along with a comment that read ‘Bipolar’ with a question mark next to it. She growled lowly knowing she was not crazy and she sat the notepad aside sitting back as she crossed her leg over the other rolling her ankle as she did. Maybe she was.