did I miss you all this time? was I busy chasing fireflies because they lit up sometimes? was I busy running from flashing light to flashing light because they were warm? was I busy trying to make myself feel better because you were too far away or because I knew I wasn't happy enough for you? was I too busy or was I too sad? was I sad when I went through the motions every day? was I sad when I ignored your calls that one summer? was I sad when I found out you were dedicating your life to our country? was I sad when I realized I wouldn't have you to hold? or was I sad for a million other reasons already? yeah, that's it. I was sad already. you just didn't help, but I want to help you now.
I’m sorry I didn’t let you help me // c.r.












