Why You Do the Things You Do - Dr. Tim Clinton & Dr Gary Sibcy (December 2017 - March 2018)
“Are you really there for me? Can I count on you? Do you really care about me? Am I worthy of your love and protection? What do I have to do to get your attention, your affection, your heart? … Our answers to these questions significantly impact why we do the things we do in our relationships.”
“But for those of us who have been taught that our emotional needs are not legitimate - that to feel upset, to feel hurt, and to feel helpless are signs of weakness - the message of God’s everlasting love is a difficult one to accept. Some people can accept that truth on a rational, cognitive level, but emotionally they feel otherwise. To make matters worse, these people too often believe that if they don’t emotionally feel accepted by God, if they doubt His loving-kindness and benevolence, then they should question their salvation… Those with an ambivalent relationship style tended to doubt their salvation very frequently, wondering if they had really said the right thing to God when they were saved or if they had somehow committed the unpardonable sin.”
“Interactions… during a child’s first several years of life… lay the groundwork for how children respond to God in the future. These interactions with Mom answer questions like is God present? Is He accessible? Will He welcome us into His lap for comfort, or will He trivialise the pain and send us with a bony, accusing finger from His throne room? Is God trustworthy and dependable?”
“We understand from our earliest childhood experiences that our greatest fear is separation - being left alone, left at the mercy of the surrounding, hostile elements. As we mature and become more self-reliant, that ever-present fear of being left alone morphs into the fear of death. One of Jesus’ chief resurrection goals was to free us from the fear of death and provide us with a place of refuge. So He hands us the keys to heaven where we will serve Him forever in the halls of His love. That’s ultimate security.”
“People who constantly have the gas pedal to the floor are doomed to be godless.”
“The rationale for this discipline [secrecy of good works] is to help us “lose or tame the hunger for fame, justification, or just the mere attention of others.” As we practice this discipline, we learn to focus on what’s above, not the adoration of man, and even to accept misunderstanding without the loss of the true peace, joy and purpose we get solely from God, through Jesus.”
“Paul told the Thessalonians, “Pray continually” (1 Thessalonians 5:17)... the admonition refers to a state of mind where we constantly talk with God about our ideas, thoughts, feelings and concerns… We filter everything through his perspective… Another dimension to the discipline of simple prayer is that we look for God’s presence, His comfort, and His security in the nooks and crannies of our lives. And as we talk to Him and include Him constantly in our consciousness, we come to Him as we are, not as we think we should be, believing that He can, and will, meet us where we are.”
“When we meditate we learn to listen to God, to discern that still, small voice that directs us and comforts our souls.”
“Those who totally restrict their emotions can’t just choose from the gut; they get caught up in endless cycles of pondering the pros and cons.”
“It follows that when we disavow our raw emotions, we deny that Christ is powerful enough to help us deal with them honestly, and our denial pushes Him away. If we push Him away enough, we come to experience Him as a distant, uninvolved, even uncaring Engineer of the universe. We become emotional atheists, denying the reality of God’s ability to touch our hearts and heal our deepest wounds.”
Find out more at: https://www.bookdepository.com/Why-You-Do-Things-You-Do-Tim-Clinton/9781591454205