Something that really upsets me is when people are like "Just get a planner!" I know they mean it to be helpful but it's just such a thing I've heard over and over again and so in an emotional response I can't help but say "Don't you think I've tried that?" Or something like that and then they get the Face.
And I feel bad because I snapped and now they hate me and that means I should probably die.
But hearing "Get a planner," is so frustrating because I have an entire graveyard of them, strewn across my bed, in my closet, in old backpacks, all of which I can't bring myself to throw out.
It's hurtful because I know they don't mean it in a malicious way, but it just proves how they don't understand my struggle and don't understand me and it makes me feel so alone. And before I know it, I've been stewing in these emotions and how I reacted and how they hate me and it's 12 o'clock? I missed my morning class.
It happens every time and I feel like garbage and maybe I'm just being contrary and a planner will help me, I just haven't found the right one??
Except I don't and it doesn't and after I add another headstone, someone (who's noticed me coming in late for the third time due to timeblindness) off handedly says,
"Why don't you just use a planner?"
And it starts again.