Warning for internalized Transphobia, which is directed at Nat as well.
Nat ducked away from the many bats that had invaded the mansion. While he had gotten used to much of the McGucket shenanigans, he was not itching to get bit today. He ducked under a curtain reading "In Progress" that seemed covered enough that there at least would not be as many bats. He was practically crawling, so it was quite awkward to realize he was not the only one in the small space.
"Oh… Shea!" He said.
When she turned her head Nat's brain froze. She was holding a fistful of hair in one hand and what must have been children's scissors in the other. The thing that caught him the most off guard was that she was crying.
"Feeling a haircut?" Nat offered, almost facepalming from his lack of tact.
Shea placed the scissors to her hair and said, "I don't deserve this hair, I'm not…"
"Deserve? You don't have to-" Nat started reaching out a bit to push down her hand.
"Leave me alone!" Shea said instead turning the scissors at him.
Nat immediately put his hands up, a bit of him relieved that her frustration was focused on him now. "Do you want me to get Emma May?" He offered since she was clearly unhappy with him being there. It was fair since he barely knew her.
The face she made hurt him. She looked terrified.
"No! She won't- can't" she said. More tears started running down her face.
Nat was going about this all wrong, he knew it. Yet he really did not know this kid well enough to guess what he should say. So, it had to do with hair and something with Emma May. Nat tried to find something good to say. Annoyingly he could only ask,
"Is something wrong?" Of course there was. What was he doing?
"I'm wrong" It was said quiet enough he almost did not hear it but he did. He hated how comforted he felt by the familiarity of this problem.
"There's nothing wrong with you" Nat said easily.
"I promised to stop lying and I'm still lying about who I am," she said lowering the scissors and curling inward. Ok, so this problem is very familiar so- "and you're lying too!" she added pointing the scissors again but more like she forgot she had them.
"What?"
"You're a girl pretending to be a boy and I'm- I am just a-"
"If that's how you want to think about it."
"It's the correct way!" Shea said, rising and standing over him. She breathed hard like it was taking all her effort to talk. Nat wondered if that is what he was like when he would argue with the fae about being a boy as a kid.
"That's what I used to fear I was doing. Maybe I am, but I don't care." Nat smiled up at her.
"But…" She was fully sobbing now.
"People love me for who I am now. I think it would make me more of a liar if I went back to pretending to be a girl."
Before Nat could offer anything else, Shea threw the scissors at him and fled. Nat tried to follow but could not duck around the many wires and chunks of metal fast enough to see where she disappeared to. He stood unsure for a while, hoping he had not made it worse. Swatting away the still swooping bats, he simply left.
Running home, Nat dug in his many book collections. He had to pull out several totes before he found the small horde he'd made as a teen. They were books of all kinds, but all about being transgender. There were all genres of books with trans leads and side characters and books more about general information. He remembered his own tears on these pages and flipped to several where he had poorly doodled himself as the lead. Hopefully Shea would not mind. It took an hour or so to find all the ones that featured a transwoman in some point of importance.
Nat grabbed a bag and wrapped them all up carefully. Now that the totes were all practically dumped onto the floor, he dug around for a couple of his more feminine outfits but added some more neutral ones as well. He really wishes he knew Shea better. Guess the advantage of transitioning so late meant he had plenty of stock to share. The bag was quite heavy by the end, but it still did not feel like enough. Yet, best not to be overwhelming.
Nat trekked back up to the McGucket Mansion. The adrenaline of everything barely getting him through the door. He had been there long enough to know the back way in. He did not want to risk outing Shea. He debated where to leave the bag for a while before stuffing it into the dustiest project he could find. Then he crawled back into the tight space. He wrote a quick note on a scrap of paper detailing the location of the bag. He roughed it up enough, so it looked like any other piece of trash on the floor but placed it on top of the kid scissors.
She could reject the gift if she wanted but, he hoped it would at least give her pause if she came back for the scissors.
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