#tisa oc

[lennyguardianistheonlyright]

Lenny, drunk and sleep deprived: Don’t tell snowball but I think I wanna cuddle him Tisa, immediately texting Guardian what Lenny just told her: Okay I won’t

[lennyguardianistheonlyright]

Lenny: *on the phone* Tisa. I won’t be coming by the lab today.

Tisa: Why?

*Lenny passes the phone to Guardian who is sitting on his chest*

Guardian: Meoww, Hisss?!

Tisa: I see. Stay safe.

[lennyguardianistheonlyright]

Lenny: About a week ago, I accidentally slept with snowball.

Tisa: .... really?

Lenny: yes.

Tisa: you accidentally slept with Guardian?

Lenny: yes.

Tisa: accidentally?

Lenny: yes.

Tisa: i don't understand, did you trip or something?

[lennyguardianistheonlyright]

Lenny: Helpful grammar tip! Farther is for physical distance, further is for metaphorical distance, and father is for emotional distance!

Tisa: Who hurt you?

Lenny: My father, please pay attention Tisa.

[lennyguardianistheonlyright]

[Lenny is casually searching around the room]

Tisa: Hey [Lenny], what’re you looking for?

Lenny: My will to live.

[Guardian walks into the room]

Lenny: Oh, there it is.

[lennyguardianistheonlyright]

Lenny: *does something*

Tisa’s Inner Monologue: It’s times like these that you have to look inside yourself and say “What am I willing to put up with today?” NOT FUCKING THIS!

[lennyguardianistheonlyright]

Lenny: We need to get through this locked door. Fanta, give me your credit card. 

Tinky Winky: Here. 

Lenny, pocketing it: Thanks. Tisa, kick down the door.

[lennyguardianistheonlyright]

Lenny: Heads up: if you try to make a candle with food coloring, the food coloring will just sink to the bottom of the glass, and when the flame eventually reaches the bottom, all the food coloring will catch fire and become one giant tall flame that you cannot possibly blow out and the glass will start to crack and then you'll throw your coffee on it in a panic and then the extremely hot food coloring will boil and sizzle horribly and then the glass will shatter.

Lenny: Please take my word on this.

Tisa, horriffed: What did you do, sir?

Lenny: A Mistake.