👀 + what are her thoughts on Lotor?
Send my muse “👀 + a question” and they’ll have to answer with 100% honesty. | @tobisforum
What are her thoughts on LOTOR? Well, it wasn’t that easy to explain, in all honesty. A complex concoction of affection and mild disdain. Having shared so much time abored that small vessel. Her entire world had revolved around their small ragtag team of halfbreeds making their way through life one moment at a time. Deca-Phoebs of time spent getting to know one another yet had any of them truly know the inner workings of each other’s minds?
How long had he been angry? How many deca-phoebs had he spent sorrowed with the burden of it all? At the time she was so angry with him and hurt. Claiming that he wasn’t the person she thought he had been. But the truth was, she never meant to leave him behind. Her words had been spewed out in anger and bitterness. Poison dripping from her fangs in the heat of the moment fueled by his own rage.
❝ I trusted him with my life. I also would have given him my life without question. He deserved better. Better than what I gave him. Better than what life dealt him. I do not hate him as the rest of the universe will. I wish I could have helped him. ❞
She had been his right hand. His sword and his shield.
❝ I let my own anger blind me. I never intended to leave him behind, if I could take it back I would have worded it in a better way. I could not follow him down the path he was threatening to go down… I had hoped as well that my unwillingness to walk by his side would show him his path was the wrong one. It was foolish to assume I was of great enough importance to sway his mind in his current state. ❞
Plum lips pursing together soon after. Only to shift her gaze away with unease. She had cared so much for him… perhaps more than she should have.
❝ I can’t help but wonder how long had he been angry for? How alone he must have felt. How did I not see the darkness closing in on him? ❞
It’s regret that will always plague her. That she couldn’t lend a claw to save him from the darkness of his own mind. That she could not lift the burden from his shoulder’s long enough. There was so much more she wished to say to him. So much more that should have been done. And now she will never get the chance.