Thank you and also sorry for taking so long! ♥♥♥And also thanks to @chip-whitley for being lovely as always, and betaing this a little ♥
“Yes, there is a very plausible reason for why I’m knocking at your window at 3am on a Thursday”, Todd says before Dirk has even had enough time to comprehend what is happening. But Todd seems to be correct – it is indeed 3am, Todd is indeed balanced precariously on the windowsill, and has indeed knocked before, and if Todd says that there is a plausible reason for him being there, then Dirk believes him.“Hello”, he greets, still a little bit sleepy, still a little bit confused, and opens the window further, so Todd can come inside. Not very gracefully, but Dirk decides against mentioning that detail. “A plausible reason. Yes. Sloths?”
Todd stops mid-motion, mouth hanging open and one of his hands raised, as if to try tame his hair – in Dirk’s opinion, a horrible idea– then asks, very slowly, the single syllable pronounced carefully, “Sloths?”“Well, yes. Can you imagine anything more subtly terrifying than an army of sloths chasing you? You can rest, of course, even go through your day more or less normally, because sloths are terribly, terribly slow, but in the end, there is no escape. You are always being chased.”A second or two pass with Todd not saying a word, hand still raised, and just looking at him, before his face does that thing it does when he has to admit something he really, really doesn’t like, some emotion just between despair and resignation. Dirk hasn’t found a name for it yet, but maybe he should, because it keeps happening.
“That made sense in an incredibly weird way, and I really wish it didn’t”, Todd finally says, pushes his hand through his hair, which, as if to spite him, sticks up in even more peculiar directions afterwards. Dirk silently congratulates it for its valiant effort. “But no, it wasn’t sloths, Dirk.”“Pity.” Dirk answers, still more interested in how soft Todd’s hair looks, especially when it’s a mess like it is right now. “Was it a sofa, inexplicably stuck in the staircase and thus blocking your way, which no one can even hope of moving intact, although that should be a physical impossibility? I hear there are rather good computer programs to help with problems like that.”“What – no, of course it’s not an immovable sofa! Is this really what you think of first when you hear the words plausible reason?”
Dirk takes a moment to consider – he is rather sleepy, so his brain still needs some time to wake up – but then nods his head. “Some of the first things, at least. There is still, of course, the possibility of the planet being blown up to make space for an intergalactic bypass, or other small inconveniences. Or, of course, since Blackwing kept us apart for quite some time, you might have just missed me, and decided that, since your flat is below mine, you might just take the direct route, instead of bothering with mundane things, like doors, or stairs. If that’s the case, then I don’t get why you stuck to knocking, but, in my opinion, it’s a rather nice touch.”A few moments pass in silence, while Todd blushes faintly, the pink dusting his skin looking warm and inviting in the light filtering in from the street. Dirk is almost tempted to touch, only stops himself because he doubts the gesture would be appreciated.
“Wh – that’s not – I mean”, Todd starts to stutter, rather unlike the Todd Dirk has come to know, cheeks turning darker with each passing second, “Okay, that’s not it, like, absolutely not it, because I happen to value the comfort of a good, nice, solid staircase and since I own things again that are more or less un-smashed, I have become rather attached to my door, but you are also… not wrong. About the thing. The missing. Thing. I did miss you… a bit. When you were gone. Which really was a long time, Blackwing and the whole… thing with them. And not a particularly happy one, but then again, it wasn’t for you either. For any of us.”
Todd looks surprisingly helpless for someone so surprisingly capable, as if at least half of those words had just burst from his mouth without him knowing about their existence first, hands flailing somewhere in between his thigh and waist. Dirk isn’t quite sure what to do to help him, so he tries the first thing he can think of – it’s three in the morning after all and he’s not as awake as he would like to be – and puts a hand on Todd’s shoulder.“That’s nice, you know? I missed you too. Farah and Amanda and everyone, but mostly you. And after all, it has been three days and seven hours since we have last seen each other, which, in my opinion, is far too long, and definitely means missing your best friend is appropriate.”
Beneath his palm, muscles shift in Todd’s shoulder, sinews relaxing and tensing, and there is a moment in which Dirk wants to pull him close and just feel that Todd is really there, next to him, alive and not just a figment of his imagination. He doesn’t, though, just because he isn’t certain if Todd really looks up at him with that little hint of awe Dirk believes he is seeing.“You counted?”The question catches Dirk a bit off guard, because it’s one he never considered having to answer; he blinks, blinks another time, then nods.“Yes, of course. I always do.”
A moment passes, Todd’s eyes shining with something and yet nothing Dirk can name, then he asks, “For all of them, or just – just for me?”“For you. Only you.” Counting out the days and hours he hasn’t seen everyone he knows, or just everyone he cares for nowadays, would be far too difficult, would take too much time, but Dirk doesn’t add that, because the atmosphere shifts; it’s dark and Todd is standing close to him, both things that have happened before, and yet seem to hold new meaning now. Maybe it’s because it’s the middle of the night, maybe it’s because Todd is looking at him still, an expression painted across his face in electric light and shadows, which Dirk cannot read, maybe it’s because Dirk meant what he said: he missed Todd, starts missing him the second the other leaves the room, and can’t see that changing anytime in the future. And the confirmation that Todd misses him too, even if maybe not to this extent, is enough to make this moment special.
Todd doesn’t say a word, just nods, and his cheeks are still as pink as before, if not pinker still, and Dirk smiles at him, happy and content and wondering if he should maybe offer Todd a cup of tea; it’s too early for coffee.He’s just about to do so – he does have a chocolate fudge-flavoured Earl Grey somewhere, which he has been dying to try, and what better way to do so than with the most important person in his life? – but then Todd shuffles half a step closer, looks up at him with eyes that are wider, and far more blue than any pair of eyes should have the right to be.“Dirk”, he says, with the voice that always indicates that Todd means it, and wants whatever he is going to say to be taken seriously, so Dirk doesn’t move, just looks back. “In case I got this all wrong – and I might, because honestly, I still only understand maybe 35% of you and I am not sure that is ever going to change – then stop me, okay? But if I haven’t, well…”
He’s about to reply that Todd understands at least 42% of him, but he never gets to do so; Todd comes closer, until Dirk can see the light filtering in through the open window turn his eyelashes translucent, golden. Something about their closeness takes Dirk’s breath away in an unfamiliarly pleasant way, makes his skin tingle without being touched, and his heart beats once, twice, thrice, without anything happening, then Todd leans up and their lips brush softly, tentatively.It’s not Dirk’s first kiss, but it’s the first one that matters, and with one of Todd’s hands lightly resting on his hip, and Dirk’s own heart suddenly overflowing with joy, affection, and something much more complicated and yet much sweeter, Dirk realises that it won’t stay the only one, either.
