#topic: individuality

[sys-advice-corner]

Genuine question— is it possible for an alter to be transfem if the body the system inhabits is.. the opposite?

For context: the host/body is transmasc, but the alter in question is an introject of a character who's a cis male in source. The alter is genderfluid. They asked if they would be considered transfem, or if they could be. We haven't been able to tell if we just introjected a transfem version of said character, if how she feels now vs in canon is something she considers a transfem experience, etc. But the body is AFAB, so- would that count?? Is it even possible??

There are other possibilities at hand ofc, but before we consider those we wanna be sure this is actually possible, cause if not we can look for a different label that might be similar but suit our situation better

[PT: Welcome! Please, take a seat.]

I'm sure there are terms out there for this specific experience! I can't seem to find the ones I'd seen though.. :(

I've seen plenty of systems (especially trans and genderqueer systems) use labels like transfem, transmasc, and cis for alters no matter how the body presents. The logic as I understand it is that multigender, genderfluid, etc. could describe themselves that way.

Personally, I don't see much harm in it, I suppose. Gender within systems is a complicated topic, and a part identifying with both transness and the body's assigned sex certainly seems like a possibility to me.

I know that even some non-systems identity with the terms "AFAB transfem" and "AMAB transmasc," commonly those who are intersex. I've seen a litany of different thoughts on whether those terms are exclusive from other intersex folks, so I'm uncertain what the general consensus is there..

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[sys-advice-corner]

This might be a silly one but. What to do with alters that have wildly different aesthetics? One of us really wants piercings and tats but the others are concerned about, yk, if they front later and realize they hate this nearly permanent addition to the body 😭 or honestly headmates with wildly different fashion tastes too lmao. Kinda hard to balance a wardrobe when your preferences are impossible to mix 💔

[PT: Welcome! Please, take a seat.]

"Silly ones" are very welcome!

We have run into this problem fairly frequently... Many of our preferred styles are vastly different from one another. The best option we have found is to get clothes that can be used in many styles (plain & neutral shirts, etc.) and many accessories, with a few articles that are more solidly in certain aesthetics. We still have several styles that are left out, but it helps us cover what we can.

Unfortunately, I'm not very informed about tattoos or piercings, but I imagine there's some sort of middle ground that can be reached there too. It might be getting a smaller tattoo that can be covered more easily, less flashy piercings, or any number of other things. I apologize that I can't be much help on this particular aspect of your question.. ^^'

[PT: The owner of this blog is anti-endo, anti-radqueer, and anti-proship. If you are a supporter of these, kindly do not interact!]

[sys-advice-corner]

What is the general opinion on black alters using AAVE if they're in a white body? Like can we use our slang or are we restricted? Obviously I get I can't say any slurs, thats understandable, but what about AAVE??

[PT: Welcome! Please, take a seat.]

I don't know much about the use of language as a closed part of culture as I sadly don't have much access to our collective understanding of it.. ^^

That being said, I would believe the answer is no.

Additionally, I do know that "alter race" isn't a thing. Parts may present with different skin colors in appearance, but they aren't considered BIPOC unless the system as a whole is.

[PT: The owner of this blog is anti-endo, anti-radqueer, and anti-proship. If you are a supporter of these, kindly do not interact!]

[sys-advice-corner]

advice for alters trying to find their own identity? we dont consider ourselves very creative people and as an unfortunate result alters in our system tend to not be able to find identities until latching onto something preexisting; in a way, alters that aren’t introjects r forcing themselves to introject from a source just so they know who they r.

[PT: Welcome! Please, take a seat.]

I know a few of our non-introject parts have found success largely by fronting more often and noticing what they're drawn to. Personality quizzes—especially more "silly" ones—can be helpful too. What animals are they drawn to? What colors? What styles? Hobbies can help too.

It's also worth knowing that many people pick up traits from pieces of media they consume (even non-systems). Figuring out what characters a part is drawn to can make a part feel more "solid" in presentation/identity. This seems to be what you're describing, and it can absolutely be healthy to explore yourself (as a whole or as a part) through the lens of fiction. Just be careful with that if you're prone to psychosis.. /lighthearted

One thing that I've seen a few times as advice for this is to keep a journal of things you like/don't like, thoughts you have, etc. This can be helpful for both individual and collective identities. Journalling is a bit of a tired piece of advice, but there can definitely be some merit to it.

[PT: The owner of this blog is anti-endo, anti-radqueer, and anti-proship. If you support these, kindly do not interact!]

[sys-advice-corner]

This is moreso a community question that we wanted to ask cause we've seen a lot of different opinions on it — is it really so bad if fictives don't change their names from their sources, even if their in-source names don't match the body's current nationality/ethnicity? Not them claiming to be the ethnicity tied to the name, just not changing their name

From what we've seen some ppl insist you have to change it cause it would be disrespectful to use a name the body can't claim(?), while others say as long as you're not tacking on the name to try to be "aesthetic" or glorifying then it's fine? We're moreso in camp 2 but is that, like. Bad?

(Also we know the conversation is a little different when it comes to brainmades but here we specifically mean the situation of a fictive with a non-white name in a white-bodied sys, is it like a grey area or should they always change their names if they fit the above?)

[PT: Welcome! Please, take a seat.]

This is another oft-discussed topic in a lot of spaces. There are some names that are absolutely closed (particularly those from highly-colonized cultures). We tend to be very cautious with it for ourselves, though much of that is informed by the importance our own culture places on names.

Please be kind to one another if you intend to respond.

[PT: The owner of this blog is anti-endo, anti-radqueer, and anti-proship. If you are a supporter of these, kindly do not interact!]

[sys-advice-corner]

Hi there!

I'm wondering if you (or anyone else) have any advice on helping other parts/alters develop their own identity despite only fronting for a specific reason.

We currently have a part that is seemingly very slowly developing an identity despite fronting almost weekly since Novemberish (sorry my memory is kinda foggy about this) and it is only today that they have a name option. They front weekly due to having a ecology related work experience and they do write down what happens and all, but not much about themself. Currently all we know is a name, two animals they like and a fav pokemon and thats it. I do really wish to help them more figure themself out, but I also dont want to cause unnecessary harm or stress to anyone. I kinda feel like I don't have enough time to even talk to them (well I can't really, sometimes when I'm also there I can only just watch and it feels like my voice gets lost in an echo chamber), but I do just really want to help them.

Thanks in advance :)

[PT: Welcome! Please, take a seat.]

If this part wants to develop themselves more as an individual, it may help to figure out small things they enjoy. If they can listen to music while they work (even if it's for shorter periods), what artists/genres do they like? What do they like about their favorite animals/Pokémon? Do they have any small habits they've picked up, like stims? Little things can go a long way in learning more about people.

[PT: The owner of this blog is anti-endo, anti-radqueer, and anti-proship. If you are a supporter of these, kindly do not interact!]

[sys-advice-corner]

hello I hope my typing quirkk doesn’t make it harder to read!! But you cann call me m4tt!

So our host has been trying to make sure everyone at least has a name and stuff. (Att least so fae can log them if I’m correct?) But the co-host often feels like their forcing an identityy onto some of thee alters thatt don’t havee identitiess yett. I’ve been wanting to helpp out more around the system apartt from being a littlee. If my question makess sense do youu know if there is anyy way that the alters can still have a name without it feelingg forced?

sorry if myy question doesn’t make any sensee I usually don’t ask this stuff..! -m4tt_wazhere

[PT: Welcome! Please, take a seat.]

Some of our more fragmented parts whom we keep record of use nicknames/"codenames" related to why they have formed or something similar. These may be placeholders, or may stick as their names.

[PT: The owner of this blog is anti-endo, anti-radqueer, and anti-proship. If you are a supporter of these, kindly do not interact!]