White Knuckles (Maris) - Cliffs Edge (Hayley Kiyoko) - i wanna be your girlfriend (girl in red) - Sports (Beach Bunny) - She Keeps Me Warm (Mary Lambert) - 1950 (King Princess) - Sick of Losing Soulmates (dodie) - Girls Like Girls (Hayley Kiyoko) - When Somebody Loved Me (Geri Childs) - You Belong With Me (Jess Moskaluke) - Killer Queen (Queen) - Wish You Were Gay (Claud) + More!!
It’s not like he doesn’t trust Bea with his life, but just that small, one-person addition that brings the total number of people in the know to three instead of two, makes it that much more dangerous.
He could lose his company, if this got out. Booster would lose his endorsement deals and modelling contracts. The League would never hear the end of it.
All because Ted couldn’t wait another five seconds for the elevator doors to close before pressing Booster up against the side of it and shoving his tongue into his mouth.
The sound of a purse hitting the floor behind him had only just barely broken through the wave of Booster-related endorphins, but he managed to catch her wide gaze before the doors closed, and that was that.
It’s out there, now.
Just the word out sends another wave of anxiety coursing through Ted’s body. He cringes into his pillow as he twists his fingers through the sheets. They had been so careful, up until now. Booster doesn’t really realise the danger they could be in, the public outrage that could happen if their actual relationship status was ever revealed. He can’t understand. He didn’t grow up here, in this time; he didn’t have to live through viciously homophobic fathers or blatant public disgust with the word homosexual, like even the word was something dirty and unclean. Even with the AIDS epidemic in full-swing, Booster still has trouble understanding.
It’s just not a thing, in the future, he had told him one night, with the sweat still cooling between their chests and his fingers trailing through the little tufts of hair on Ted’s chest with a lazy, unconcerned touch. It’s just– normal. No one cares; no one even thinks to care, it’s so normal.
Ted remembers trying to picture it– a society without homophobia. Where he could reach out to hold Booster’s hand in public and have no one bat an eye. Where he could finally not have that nervous twist in his stomach every time Booster reached out to touch him, for fear of being discovered. Maybe we should go back there, he had half-joked, pushing the sweaty clumps of hair off of Booster’s forehead so he could lean down and plant a kiss right above his eyebrow. It’s bad in other ways, Booster had mumbled into his skin, right before twisting his arm around Ted’s chest, kissing the spot right above his sternum, and drifting off to sleep.
But we wouldn’t have to hide, Ted had thought. Maybe that was worth all the other horrible things Booster had told him about the 25th century. Maybe Ted could piece back together Booster’s broken time sphere he had buried and take them into the 21st century, where Booster had assured him public opinion has- will change, and they could be together like Ted so desperately wants.
But that’s decades from now; that bright future seems so hopelessly far away, and now someone else knows. It could all be over before him and Booster could even start considering the possibility of a happily ever after.
(and even just that thought sends a pang of longing stabbing through Ted’s chest)
“Fuck,” Ted proclaims to his ceiling with feeling, flopping a hand over his eyes and using the blanket to muffle his noise of frustration.
Someone knocks on the door. Ted freezes. It’s not Booster– he’s never quite mastered the whole knock before entering deal. It’s a timid knock, the second one hesitating before connecting with the wood. Ted stares at the doorknob, considering the merits of just pretending he’s not here.
“I know you’re in there, Ted.”
Tora’s soft voice wafts in from under the gap between door and carpet, and Ted relaxes on instinct, before tensing back up. Shit, does Tora know too? He almost slaps himself. Of course she does; her and Bea are so close they’re practically the same person. He pushes himself to his feet and pads through the shag carpet, hesitating before reaching for the door handle.
He’s not quite sure what he’s so afraid of. He trusts Tora- and Bea. Maybe it’s just the fact that he’s been hiding this part of himself for so long that the thought of sharing it with anyone other than Booster is terrifying. Hell, sharing it with Booster was terrifying– and that was without him even confessing anything.
His mouth had been a little busy at the time.
Tora taps again, quiet, yet firm, and Ted sighs, rubbing the corner of his eyes with his thumb and forefinger. Time to face the music. He tugs open the door a few inches and pokes his face out. And blinks.
Tora’s wearing a onesie. Some light blue thing with a fur-lined hood, even a little pocket on the tummy. His eyes make it all the way down to her fuzzy white slippers before the laugh works its way out of his throat. He clamps his lips down around it and grins at her.
“Shut up,” Tora laughs as she smacks his arm lightly. “Bea made fun of me, too. It’s comfortable!”
Ted feels the tension seep out of his shoulders as he gives her another once over and snickers behind his hand. “I’ll bet.”
Tora sticks her tongue out at him. Ted swings open the door a little bit further to lean against the doorframe. He hesitates; feels a drop of sweat slide down the back of his neck.
“Um- what’s up?”
Her eyebrows raise ever-so-slightly, and then she leans to the left to poke her head over his shoulder. “Is Booster here?”
Ted feels the hot flush work its way over his cheeks in a matter of milliseconds. “I- no,” his voice squeaks as he tries to keep his cool. “Why would he–”
Tora’s hand reaches out to squeeze his arm, cutting him off. She tilts her head to the side and smiles at him, warm and sincere.
“Ted,” she admonishes in that don’t-bullshit-me tone that always throws Ted off guard. “It’s okay.” She taps on her nose with a reassuring quirk of her lips. “It’s just me.”
Ted’s eyes flick between hers, once- twice, and then he lets his guard drop, hand running through the messy clump of auburn tufts with a tired motion.
“I–” he takes a deep breath. “Yeah, okay. Okay.” It’s okay, she already knows. “Okay,” he says again, for good measure. “Uh- no, he’s not here. I told him to stay in his own room, since-” he glances at her helplessly, words catching in his throat. “Since.. you know.”
Tora’s smile morphs into something more sympathetic, and she squeezes her fingers around his bicep one more time.
“Can you get him? Bea wants to talk.”
Ted blanches, nerves erupting in his stomach. “Talk about what?” His mind immediately goes to eight hundred different terrible places. Black mail. Public shaming. Bea waiting with Ted’s dad waiting to send him to one of those gay conversion camps he had threatened him with as a kid.
Tora waves her hand in front of his face to get his attention. “Nothing bad!” she insists, eyes wide. “She just has a, uh-” she glances around the hallway. “A proposition for you guys.”
Ted raises an eyebrow incredulously. “A.. proposition?”
The white fur on the hood flops down as Tora nods. “Uh huh! Just-” she leans a little closer. “Meet in the women’s bathroom on the third floor,” she whispers conspiratorially, and then she’s gone, spinning on the heel of her fluffy white slipper and turning the corner back into the hallway.
Ted slumps against the doorframe, stomach churning with trepidation. He blinks a few times, glances back longingly at his dark, safe room, and then, obediently, shuffles along the carpet to go get Booster.
“Why do we have to meet in the women’s bathroom, again?”
Booster kicks his feet from on top of the sink. Ted leans against the wall of the handicap stall, fingers tapping against his forearm in a nervous staccato. If anyone notices his strategic position as far away from Booster as possible, they don’t mention it.
“Because,” Bea starts, slowly, as if it’s obvious why Ted has a feminine hygiene dispenser digging into his ass. “This is the only room not able to be accessed by the League monitoring system.”
Booster’s legs stop kicking. “What.” He shoots Ted a look. “Really?”
Ted shrugs. “Hey, I didn’t design it,” he holds up a finger, “only.. modified it.”
Beatriz rolls her eyes. He sees Tora smile at him from her perch on top of the supply cabinet.
Booster hops off the sink and leans back against it, crossing his arms over his chest defensively. He glances at Ted. “Okay,” he starts, awkwardly and after a brief moment’s hesitation. He scoots imperceptibly closer to Ted’s position before continuing. “What did you want to- talk about?”
The paper towel dispenser squeaks as Bea shifts against it uncomfortably. Ted watches her gaze drift to Tora’s slippers, then to her face, and then back to her own feet, before she takes a deep breath that sets Ted on edge.
“Okay,” Bea says, pushing down a cuticle on her nail with an air of nonchalance betrayed by the way Ted can see her leg bouncing up and down against the cheap vinyl bathroom tiles. She takes another breath- glances at Tora again. Tora nods at her encouragingly. Bea huffs in annoyance, blowing her bangs off her face with a burst of hot air, and point at the Ted.
“Okay, obviously we know about- you guys,” she blurts out all at once.
Ted tenses up with a grimace. Booster shifts along the wall until he’s touching Ted’s sock with his bare foot.
“Which, honestly,” Bea continues, “I don’t know how you–” she points at Booster accusingly “– managed to keep it under wraps for this long. It’s actually mildly impressive.”
Booster puts his hand on his chest, offended. “Hey, I can be discrete when I need to be.”
Ted’s too busy panicking to remind him about that time when he told Max about his surprise party literally 3 minutes after they decided to throw him one. Booster’s so hopelessly sincere. It’s simultaneously one of his most endearing and most infuriating qualities. He shakes his head and forces himself to meet Bea’s gaze.
“What’s your point?” Ted grits out, words only slightly wobbly. Every muscle in his body is tense; he knows that Bea wouldn’t betray them, but some part of him- the same part that cowered under his Dad’s hateful glare when he caught him dancing to Gene Kelly musicals as a kid- can’t help but wait for the ball to drop.
Bea looks at him in surprise. “I–” she cuts herself off, biting on her bottom lip for a moment before glancing at Tora again. Tora smiles reassuringly. Bea stares at her for a moment longer, before glancing back at Ted.
“I thought we could..” she waves her hand in the air in a vague, mysterious motion “.. help each other.”
Ted purses his lips and raises an eyebrow. Booster responds before he can.
“What do you mean, help each other?” Booster asks, eyebrows furrowed in confusion. His eyes light up all at once. “Ahh– wait, I get what you’re saying.” He puts his hand on his chest again, apologetic this time. “Sorry, ladies, but I’m afraid Teddy here has stolen my heart and your womanly wiles cannot tempt me–”
A balled up paper towel hits him square between the eyes. Ted snorts, covering his smile with his palm.
“That’s not what I meant, you neanderthal,” Bea says with practised agitation, already rolling up the next paper towel ball in preparation. “What I meant is that–”
She cuts herself off again, this time with a choking sound, her fingers clenching tight around the paper towel. Something in her eyes looks familiar, Ted realises. Something about the way she’s holding herself, arms wrapped around her stomach and the way she keeps glancing nervously over at Tora like she wants to reach out but something is holding her back, is so, achingly familiar..
Bea bites her lip again and shifts closer to Tora so that she’s leaning against the supply cabinet. Her shoulders noticeably relax, just an inch, but it’s enough to cause Ted to realise what’s going on here- like a bolt of lightning hitting his brain.
“Wait–” Ted holds up a hand. “You and Tora?” He holds up his other hand, too, just for good measure. “Really!?” Booster shifts so that he’s leaning a little straighter.
“Her and Tora what? I don’t–”
Tora reaches out to grab Bea’s hand. Beatriz twists their fingers together and glares at them, as if daring them to say something.
A moment of silence. “Oh,” Booster realises softly. His whole face lights up, and then he rubs his hands together in front of him like some kind of C-grade villain. “Ohhhhh ho ho.”
The second, well-deserved paper towel ball hits him in the face. Ted whacks him on the side of the head too, for good measure.
He interrupts Booster’s petulant hey! by taking a step towards Tora.
“So when you said proposition, you meant–”
Tora nods, a cute flush on her face that Ted’s pretty sure isn’t from the temperature. “Like, an arrangement between us four for–” she taps her chin with a finger, as if searching for the right word “– safety?” Her eyes flick to Booster. “The world I grew up in was not so- unwelcoming to this sort of love, but I’ve seen what people are like here, and I don’t want that kind of–” she scrunches up her nose “– unpleasantness brought upon us.” She catches Ted’s gaze again with a worried expression. “Any of us.”
The look Bea gives Tora is so full of fondness that Ted almost feels like he’s intruding. She squeezes her hand before speaking.
“What she means is if we want to go out, we all go out, but like–” she looks at Booster with an air of tired acceptance “– so it looks like we’re with–” Ted sees her glance at his pajama pants; the blue ones with the purple polka dots, and then grimace ever-so-slightly “– with you guys, you know?” She rotates her fingers in a circle around themselves. “Switch it up, so people don’t realise that we’re all–”
“Gay as hell?” Booster offers with a deadpan.
That earns him another paper towel ball to the face, but this time he catches it, smirk stretching along his dimples and a quiet laugh on his lips. Ted hears Tora giggle from her perch on the cabinet and Ted can’t help his own snort that quickly transitions into a full on snicker. Something in his chest finally gives, then- like a dam that’s been at capacity for years finally opening the floodgates, and that last bit of tension seeps out of his frame as he lets himself flop to the side to press up against Booster’s arm.
“Yes, Booster,” Bea concedes with an elaborate eyeroll. She watches as Booster rotates his arm up and around Ted’s shoulder, tugging him even closer, and then smiles– one that makes her eyes crinkle along the corner from how wide it is. “That’s exactly what I mean.”
Ted forcing himself to stop giggling long enough to catch his breath. He runs his fingers through his hair with another relieved huff.
“So you guys want to go on double dates?” He catches Bea’s gaze with a wry grin. “You sure you can stomach us for that long?”
“We all have to make sacrifices to get what we want,” Bea says solemnly, hand over her heart.
Ted snorts. Booster makes an offended noise, but he’s smiling too. Relieved, Ted thinks. He saw the way Booster scooted closer to him before they knew what was going on; his instinct to comfort Ted as best as he can without crossing that line into his personal space. Sometimes he can’t quite believe how much he loves the man pressed up beside him.
“So, it’s settled then.” Tora claps her hands in front of her.
Booster pushes back off of the stall and slips his arm down to grab Ted’s hand. “Sure. Sounds good to me.” He squeezes his fingers and tilts his head to the side. “Teddy?”
Ted looks down at their hands in surprise, but then shakes his head and squeezes his fingers back. “Yeah,” he says, dragging his thumb along the outer part of Booster’s palm with a smile. “Yeah, sounds good.”
Bea pushes herself off of the cabinet and tugs Tora towards the door. “Good. I’ll let you know when we’re going out.”
“Why do you get to decide when we go out?” Booster whines.
“Because I called the meeting, which gives me the authority,” Bea retorts, reaching for the door handle with a haughty smirk.
Something feels left unsaid- unfinished. Ted realises what it is at the last moment, and grabs her arm before she can open the door. Bea spins around with a raised eyebrow. Ted feels his face grow hot, fingers scratching at the back of his neck as he tries to find the words.
“Um, I just wanted to say- thank you guys.” He glances at Tora, and then gestures between the two of them. “For being so.. um.” Booster rubs his thumb along the inside of his palm and Ted takes a breath. “So- you know.. about this. Cool, whatever.” He lets out a nervous chuckle. “For a while there I thought you guys were gonna–”
Tora grabs his free hand. “Ted,” she admonishes, gently squeezing his hand to get his attention. “Don’t think for a second that either of us would ever- reject you.” She glances at Booster and smiles. “Even if Bea and I weren’t together.. you guys are still family.”
Ted, mortifyingly, actually chokes up a little at that, and lieu of an actually using his vocal chords, squeezes Tora’s hand back.
“Unfortunately,” Bea adds, smiling in that rare, sincere way of hers, before reaching for the door handle and maneuvering her way out of the room. Ted gathers himself before, regretfully, dropping Booster’s hand and stepping out into the hallway, feeling lighter than he has in years. Booster pushes his way past Ted’s shoulder.
“So-li-darityy~” he whispers to Tora, raising his hand for a fistbump. Bea punches him in the arm. Tora grins and bumps his fist anyways.
