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Theres this boy in my class who uses offensive terms and is racist (he’s mixed) He’s used she-male, faggot, dyke, and said racist things while we were talking about slavery. He’s obnoxious and not a good person. He also said he only likes white girls and fat/chubby girls are disgusting. I would punch him.
I got harassed for being trans today. I know these things happen to trans people. But it has yet to happen to me. A drunk women walked by me and my 3 female friends. She said "how are you ladies?" and I, not knowing she was drunk, said "I'm a guy" and she just kinda looked back. And she said "well I don't give a rats ass" and I made a face and she came over and hugged me and touched my chest and I said "stop touching me, I'm uncomfortable" and she kept calling me she/her/a girl, and I kept correct her. And she said "I don't care" and then she said "Why do you keep correcting me? It's hurting my feelings" and i was like "seriously? Hurting your feelings? I'm hurt cause you keep calling me the wrong gender" and then I left to "go to the bathroom" and she threatened to follow me so we could "work this out". I am scared. I'm safe now but I feel sick to my stomach.
*Grandfather makes a transaphobic joke* *Grandfather makes a racist joke about Muslims* *Grandfather makes homophobic jokes* But why does she always leave the room???? She needs to respect her elders more.
Dear Tumblr,
So, don't get me wrong, but you are racist. Yes, you read that correctly. No, I am not talking about the kkk blogs. (/pukes, they are racist though (duh)) Yes, I am talking about our little community of bloggers. (Probably going to lose followers for this very controversial post) What I'm telling you is- You. Are. Racist. Now, before you all go bat-crap crazy on me, hear me out. If I said to you "There is a gay trans black Muslim girl out side my house and I hate him for those reasons" you would say "RACIST! HOMOPHOBE! MUSLIM HATER! TRANSAPHOBE! SEXIST!!!" and you would be right. But if I replace gay with straight, trans with cis, black with white, Muslim with Christian, and girl with guy, that would make it perfectly acceptable. I'm not trying to say that there is systematic hatred against these people, because there isn't in most cases. (Except maybe Christians) But there IS hatred HERE on tumblr dot com simply because there IS NO hatred! And that's not ok. And don't pull the whole "it's not racism/phobia until it's systematic" troupe out, because even though that is true in some ways, and while we don't need "white/ straight/ cis/ male pride" we still need to treat these people with respect! Even though it is on a bigger, more commonly accepted group, IT. IS. STILL. BIGOTRY. I can't tell you hon many times I have been hurt personally by posts about homophobia being rebloged with the comment "bet he's Christian." That HURTS! And I'm not saying this just so I don't have to see that for myself, I'm saying it because people shouldn't be messaging me on instagram telling me they want to leave tumblr because it's so hard to be a white cis male on there! I understand that it's easy to be those things in the real world. But here? The place I go to escape the hate of the real world? I still see hate. So much hate. And that is not ok. Because everyone can be awesome! And everyone can be a total ASS! I don't know home much more clear I can make it, but here it is all summed up: Gay people can be nice Gay people can be rude Straight people can be nice Straight people can be rude Men can be nice Men can be rude Women can be nice Women can be rude Non-gender conforming people can be nice Non-gender conforming people can be rude POC people can be nice POC people can be rude White people can be nice White people can be rude People of religion can be nice People of religion can be rude People of no religion can be nice People of no religion can be rude White cis straight male Christians can be nice White cis straight male Christians can be rude Black trans pansexual Hellenistic females can be nice Black trans pansexual Hellenistic females can be rude EVERYONE can be nice EVERYONE can be rude NO ONE should be hated. It's not complicated.
AFA 2014 After Dinner Speaking Top 50
So there I was on the green, on the green, when I realized either there was an involvement fair going on or I was trippin balls. Tennis balls. So green. Anyway, dozens of clubs were trying to recruit me, but only one group caught my attention: the feminist sorority. I heard all the bitches who want to experiment are there. I was quickly informed bitch is a kind of dog and women aren’t dogs. At the first rush meeting things got weird. There was a pants pat down and gnome mapping, violating my school’s hazing policy and my personal space. I asked them why and one of the robed faceless sisters told me in a whispered echo “to ensure you are all genetic women”. I bet she spelled women with a y, that pretentious female dog. But my campus canines aren’t alone in protecting genetic women. Robert Self writes in his 2013 book All in the Family radical feminists are obsessed with the feminine ideal, spreading hate rhetoric about transgender persons like “shim” and “tranny”. Devaluing not just the trans community but fighting against the equality feminism was founded on. Over time, transphobia has become deeply engrained in the feminist movement, negatively affecting other minority political groups that were naturally birthed from feminism’s unshaved legs like the LGBTQ movement. The Guardian of January 3rd 2014 describes a popular radical feminist group called Rad Fem, designed to ruin abbreviations and fight patriarchy with a membership of womyn born womyn. When activist so slimly define what it is to be a woman, we all lose. Feminists included. So first, we will tuck the problems attach to this extremist view, second we will spandex the causes, and finally we will go topless with solutions. Because as Jezbel argues on March 28th 2013, feminists cannot fight for equality if they do not believe we are all created equal.
The first thing I learned about sororities were the five Ss sisterhood, service, scholarship. Ke$ha, and shaming minorities. This maybe the dyslexia talking but I pretty sure one of those didn’t start with an S. The problems with transphobia in feminism are twofold: there is no clear message of feminism, and hatred has jumped ideologies.
First, feminists have lost their message, like how they’re always losing their keys. Think Progress on January 24th 2014 explains over the past few decades, feminism has gone from a fairly unified movement to pockets of niche political activism. Transadvocate of September 26th 2013 warns leaders of feminism mind is trapped in the 1970s when the trans community was far from the public eye. We are experience the early stages of trans rights movement but transphobia in feminism not only holds the trans community back but makes feminists seem like a taco bell taco; only 89% meat. They just don’t get the full picture. Daily Beast on January 23rd 2014 concludes, potential supporters of feminism are turning away as the hate rhetoric grows. Feminists have little connection to each other and future supporters are turned off, when the whole point is for them to be turned on.
Second, feminism presents trans-phobia as acceptable for everyone. Which makes me sad like a tired kitten, cat sound. American Spectator of January 22nd 2014 announces, the LGBTQ movement came out of feminist thinking on gender identity, so the gay rights movement has long had a major ally. Lisa Duggan wrote in her 2014 book Sex Wars: Sexual Dissent and Political Culture the queer rights as we know it today is a totally different then its beginning. Lesbians and gay men had two very separate movements with no interest in trans rights or bisexuals, who still may or may not be real. For the first two decades these movements were very disjointed until the aids crisis of the 1980s, because in the early stages of the crisis lesbians were the majority of those willing to help with the ‘gay cancer’ mainly because feline aids had yet to be discovered. As the Association of Gay and Lesbian Psychiatrist found on March 16th 2014 the LQBTQ community continues to categorize members with little overlap. Feminism baby is all grown up; the Ls are Ron Swansoning at Home Deport, the Gs are on Bravo, the Bs are being greedy, the Qs are being non-conforming, and the T in the acronym is the lonely middle child.
I’m like the Malaysia airlines. I go and go hard for 7 hours; tell everyone I’m fine and disappear. (drops/covers eyes) now you can’t fine me. You know what you can find causes! There are two: Elitism within minorities and Trans issues are not seen as feminist issues.
First, feminism has created an internal hierarchy. Patricia M. Green field notes in her 2014 Cross-cultural Roots of Minority Child Development details, within minority groups there are members who try to make themselves more of a minority. Think of that freshmen stoner that claimed to be 1/8 black so it wasn’t cliché for him to have dreads, but with real social implications instead of freshmen dorm smell. Salon on January 20th 2014 notes feminist are starting to rely on genetics and not experience to prove they are more of a woman. I think they’re trying too hard. I’ve got all the experience they’ll ever need. But believing only genetic women can classify themselves as women creates a hierarchy within feminism. Isn’t our whole goal to get rid of anything that includes “archy”?
Second, trans equality isn’t seen as the fight for gender equality. David West’s 2013 book, Social Movements in Global Politics, notes social movements are internal and have a tunneled view of the world. Feminists are acting like their tunnel is a Twinkie with one filing, when its really more like a burrito with different filings and mushrooms for some unknown reason. Moreover, Jezebel of January 12th 2014 notes feminists have their own definition of what a feminist is because, beginning in the 70s, different groups attached themselves to one issue; one group for abortion, one for equal pay, and one to find the perfect material for bra burning. I’m pro hemp. For obvious reason. But there was zero discussion on trans rights. In fact this is the first era in history were being transgendered didn’t mean a death sentence; yet feminism is as far behind as Jenny McCarthy’s kids vaccination record. Think Progress of September 12th 2013 puts it this way: transgendered rights is the perfect embodiment of gender equality, yet feminist leave their rights at the curb for not being women enough.
Now I know what you’re thinking. “Abby, I don’t care about feminism and have no interest in the fight for equality”. To which I respond, “Sexist pig, forty years ago there was a separate event for female extempers”. I climbed out too many econo-lodge ditches and fought too much patriarchy to have you take away my rights or my prep time. There are two key changes we need to recharge feminism on the activist and personal levels.
First, feminist groups have to develop a more unified message. And find their keys. TIME magazine of September 27th 2013 notes the first great era of activism was the 1960s. We have the luxury of living in the second great era of activism, but this time there’s Twitter and Gloria Steinem has a Presidential Medal of Freedom. If that trans hater can get with Barack the only Rock I’ll ever love, feminists can come together. The Washington Post of September 10th 2013 breaks it down: if older activists are unwilling to change their ways, we as the younger generations inheriting social movements have to have an open mind. So simple suggestion: Start using the hashtag #feministequality. Get a conversation started.
Second, stop supporting anti-trans organizations. Rad Fem, Human Rights Campaign, and Dan Savage are acting like high school cheerleaders: popular, but awful and soulless like Taylor Swift. They’re bullies. We shouldn't devalue the amazing things they’ve done, from pressuring Congress to pass the Lily Ledbetter Act to creating the It Gets Better campaign; saving lives. But even cheerleaders do some good; getting football players off. By throwing our money at groups with elitist and hateful rhetoric, we're perpetuating the hate we want our money to fight against. Turn toward groups like The TERFs and Freedom to Marry, who don’t leave people out in the cold based on genetics. As a gay woman who rarely walks along gender lines I cannot morally allow myself to be involved with groups that are fighting for my rights. And that’s insanity without the shrinking waist line. If you’re not a member of these minority groups, I can assure you, someone you know is. Radical feminist and elitist minorities don't speak for us, and we shouldn't let them.
My university shut down my sorority, something about Nazi agenda, drugs deals, and lesbianism. But I’m fine with that, because being part of group that rejects others on factors that you cannot control makes you a bitch. Transphobia in the feminist movement threatens to devalue all the good it’s done from fighting patriarchy to giving inspiration to the foremost civil rights battles of our time. After looking at the problems, causes, and effects of transphobia in feminism, we can see that hatred masked in activism is still hatred.
Hey Momma, I have an agender friend but their mom is transphobic as hell and I feel really bad for misgendering them anytime we're near their mom. But I know it's for their personal safety
You are doing it for their safety and your friend understands that’s why you are doing it (and they are ok with it) then you shouldn't feel bad.
You are trying to keep your friend safe and i’m sure they understand that.
I have to do that with some of my other trans friends and some of them have to do it when in front of my parent.
We both understand that its for our own safety
Hope you feel better xoxo
-Hermit Sam
So a popular Facebook page uploaded the first picture with the caption "beautiful, right?" And this is a majority of the comments. This is why I don't go on Facebook