#trigger:depression

[kaissimpparks]

Look, I get it. Y’all don’t like me making fun of my depressive, suicidal posts. But this was once, and me and all my friends had a good laugh. There are too many people I’d have to block the post from if I filtered and I don’t post that shit often, if ever. I’m having a hard time, I joke to cope. Don’t like it, you can hide it on your end. I’m tired I’m hiding my posts on my Facebook from a side of the family that makes me suppress who I really am. If more than just you? Tell me they want it gone? Then lll do it. But my guy, you haven’t been there most my life. I ain’t policing myself for you.

And that’s on self respect.

[strawhat-awakening]

Having depression is wild. It’s like existing while your brain is ... kind of muted. Like you’ll just be hanging out doing whatever but your brain is Sad and you can feel it just being sad very quietly

[strawhat-awakening]

hey fam not to be Emo again but i really hope i Die soon lmao

[strawhat-awakening]

anyway if anyone wants to straight up murder me now is a good time

[strawhat-awakening]

I can feel my depression creeping at the edges of my mind and wanting to take over again. It hasn’t been like this since I started on my medication. At least, I think so. Maybe I need to ask to up the dosage I don’t know. It seemed to be going well?? Maybe it’s uni stress. There’s a lot of that at the moment. 

[strawhat-awakening]

i dont start uni till next week but i already want to die so wow life is great 

[strawhat-awakening]

@ people who don’t have depression

what’s it like to be happy????

like seriously I want to know

[strawhat-awakening]

This is the second week in a row that I’ve missed my English tute because I’m a fucking idiot. I know that tutes are unmissable and yet I’m still a fucking idiot.

What the hell am I gonna tell my tutor?

I’m sorry, the first week I miscalculated and didn’t leave on time so I missed the train and didn’t make it to compass with enough time to make the tute.

I’m sorry, the second week I did the exact same thing except when I realised I was going to miss the train I had a panic attack and had to stay home instead. 

Please don’t fail me I’m very mentally ill but I do want to be here. 

Please don’t fail me, I just need to make it through this class so I can get to next semester and start a class I think I’m going to enjoy instead.

Please don’t fail me, I’m very mentally ill and I don’t have anything to fall back on. 

I literally hate myself so much I’m failing everyone I care about. Fuck