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Menelaus: Paris is a wanted man Hector: Impossible. He wasn't even a wanted child

#greek mythology #incorrect greek mythology #greek heroes #incorrect greek heroes #incorrect greek quotes #incorrect quotes #iliad #incorrect iliad #trojan royals #menelaus #paris of troy #hector of troy

Diomedes: Where's Agamemnon? Odysseus: Don't worry, I'll find him. Odysseus, shouting: Menelaus sucks! Agamemnon, distantly: Menelaus is the best person ever! Fuck you! Odysseus: Found him. "Meanwhile" Lycaon: Where's Hector ? Deiphobus: Don't worry, I'll find him. Deiphobus, shouting: Paris is the best person ever! Hector, distantly: SHUT THE FUCK UP!

#greek mythology #incorrect greek mythology #greek heroes #incorrect greek heroes #incorrect greek quotes #incorrect quotes #iliad #incorrect iliad #diomedes #odysseus #odysseus&diomedes #agamemnon #menelaus #atreides bros #trojan royals #hector of troy #paris of troy #deiphobus #lycaon of troy

Apollo: little Hector: Apollo: adopted Priam: lord, this is my son Apollo: now mine Apollo: *give Hector a bow* be free, my child

#greek mythology #incorrect greek mythology #greek heroes #incorrect greek heroes #incorrect quotes #incorrect greek quotes #iliad #incorrect iliad #apollo #hector of troy #priam #trojan royals

Paris: Hector is choking, I need to call 911 but the 9 button isn't working! Deiphobus: Turn it upside down and use the 6! Paris: Genius! Hector: *stops chocking momentarily* What the fuck.

#greek mythology #incorrect greek mythology #greek heroes #incorrect greek heroes #incorrect quotes #incorrect greek quotes #iliad #incorrect iliad #trojan royals #paris of troy #deiphobus #hector of troy

Priam: Cassandra, keep an eye on Paris today. He's gonna say something to the wrong person and get himself punched. Cassandra: Sure! I'd love to see Paris get punched! Priam: Try again. Cassandra, rolling her eyes: I will stop Paris from getting punched. Priam: Correct.

#greek mythology #incorrect greek mythology #greek heroes #incorrect greek heroes #incorrect greek quotes #incorrect quotes #iliad #incorrect iliad #trojan royals #priam #paris of troy #cassandra of troy

Helen: What do you think about Paris? Hector: He's a treasure. Helen: Really? Hector: Yeah, he makes me wanna bury him

#greek mythology #incorrect greek mythology #greek heroes #incorrect greek heroes #incorrect greek quotes #incorrect quotes #iliad #incorrect iliad #trojan royals #helen of sparta #helen of troy #paris of troy #hector of troy

Cassandra: Why did you guys dress up as each other for Halloween? Paris: Hector is the scariest thing I could think of. Hector: Paris told me I should pick the dumbest costume possible.

#greek mythology #incorrect greek mythology #incorrect greek heroes #greek heroes #incorrect greek quotes #incorrect quotes #iliad #incorrect iliad #trojan royals #cassandra of troy #paris of troy #hector of troy

Helen: So, how have you been? Hector: I have a headache that comes and goes. Paris: *enters the room* Hector: Oh look, there it is again.

#greek mythology #incorrect greek mythology #greek heroes #incorrect greek heroes #incorrect greek quotes #incorrect quotes #iliad #incorrect iliad #trojan royals #helen of sparta #helen of troy #hector of troy #paris of troy

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