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Trying To Tie Loose Ends (Catharsis Continuation): Chapter 10: Practice Makes Pressure

Now in Kakariko Village, Brivere gains a better understanding of what has been holding him back from fully controlling his powers. Too soon, the stress of seeing the future begins to take a toll on him, and he is forced to come to terms with why he wants this ability so badly in the first place.

(A fic for the sidlink fic Coma Baby, a continuation of the other one I made called Catharsis!)

This is a fanfiction for a fanfiction called Coma Baby by BanishedOne on AO3 (tumblr: @banishfics / @banishedone), and a continuation of the other one I wrote called Catharsis. If you like a grumpy Link and really well developed, deep characters and an amazing take on the political structure of the Zora Domain, then definitely check out Coma Baby! It’s a long read and still going on, but the writing and descriptions are superb and it just means more great content. This fic in particular is focused on my favorite character in the series, the OC Brivere. You don’t need to read the whole series to get what’s going on in this fic though, since a lot is explained in here.

I post memes and fics for Coma Baby on my tumblr, you can chat with me any time about anything! I also post all chapters on my AO3 account BunnyBob!

Huge thank you to my amazing beta reader Alina! Her tumblr and ff.net is @ipromiseitsnotanobsession. She actually does editing shit for a living and she is the one that makes sure these things aren’t trash, so

Disclaimer: In no way does this have any true ties or canon to Coma Baby unless stated otherwise. It’s really just an indulgence AU to feed my obsession for Brivere drama.

“No!” Brivere hissed, narrowing his distorted eyes behind his visor. “I refuse to go in there!”

Princess Zelda and Guard Captain Bazz sighed. Their small group had been standing on a hill that overlooked Kakariko Village for well over an hour, trying to coax the Oracle Knight into going inside of its borders.

His reluctance was completely understandable considering what he had just gone through during his capture with the Yiga Clan. Yet, the only people who possibly had even the slightest clue as to how to help the Oracle Knight’s worsening condition were within the very same village that had such strong historical ties to his kidnappers.

“Oracle Knight, it is as I said,” Princess Zelda said gently, holding her hands up to calm him down. “The Yiga Clan is just a group of crazed individuals who swore allegiance to the Calamity after being misled and tricked by Ganon. They broke off from the Sheikah clan over a century ago and that is the only thing that the two of them share. Both groups absolutely despise each other. I deeply regret that you had to go through such torture, but the fact remains that the Sheikah are our allies, and they may be the only ones who can help you.”

Breaking out of the Yiga Clan’s hideout had been nothing short of a miracle. While the Zora soldiers and the Hylian Champion were far more skilled than the Yiga, they still had to go up against dozens, if not hundreds, of Yiga Clan warriors. They had had to carry Brivere, who had passed out, while they snuck around, trying to escape by navigating the maze of hallways. The only thing that had really saved them was when Estuu had tugged Link by his tunic into a room full of bananas, and they had both started throwing them at Yiga Clan soldiers to get them to stop following their rescue group.

Thank Hylia for those banana loving mother fuckers.

After escaping, they had had to make a pit stop in a Gerudo oasis, both to get more cooling jewelry so that the Zoras didn't fry up in the desert sun and to get more health potions to heal Brivere. At first, Link had been worried when the golden knight didnt wake up, but Bazz had assured him that it was better that Brivere was out of it rather than push himself any further.

They had left Princess Zelda in Kakariko Village for safety, and so they had put Brivere on a stretcher and quickly jetted through the river system to meet her back there. He had woken up along the way but hadn’t been lucid enough to understand what was going on.

It was only when Bazz was carrying him on his back to Kakriko Village that Brivere had realized where they were and had started screaming and trying to get away. The Guard Captain had dismissed the other soldiers to tell Prince Sidon what had caused their delay, sensing that the golden knight wouldn't want to be seen in near hysterics and instead, have the chance to maintain his pride.

Which is where they were now. The only ones left in their group aside from Brivere were Princess Zelda, the Hylian Champion, the Holy Knight, and the Guard Captain. While it may have seemed completely reckless and idiotic to suddenly cut down the number of soldiers that they had, the Oracle Knight was extremely grateful for Bazz's generosity. He absolutely despised how weak he was, cutting himself no slack for being heinously tortured for nearly a day. Brivere didn't want anyone else to see him break down, and the four who remained was already pushing it.

“Do you not see how suspicious this is?!” Brivere snapped, gesturing at the Sheikah flags and banners around the village, all of them bearing the same blood red symbol of a crying eye. It was the exact same as the one his kidnappers had proudly worn, only here it was right-side up with the single tear falling the correct way.

He hated how anxious the mere sight of that wretched symbol made him. “They are practically the same insignia!”

“Technically, they are.” the princess admitted. “The symbol belonged to the Sheikah clan, and when the Yiga clan separated from them, they just turned it upside down out of pure spite and mockery. But rest assured, Kakariko Village has only recently begun to use the symbol again out of a desire to honor their history.”

“Is that supposed to make him feel better?” Link retorted with an eyebrow raised.

Brivere threw his hands up. He was just so exhausted. “Enough of this. I am going to step away and wait for you all at the bottom of the hill. If none of you follow within a few minutes, then I will proceed to head back to the Zora Domain alone.”

“You can’t!” Bazz cried out. “I have been ordered to bring you to the Sheikah’s medical attention! Prince Sidon even commanded you to get help!”

“Then we will just have to find something else. I am sorry, Guard Captain. I promise to protect you from any repercussions.” And with that, Brivere turned and walked down the hill. Estuu ran up to him and tapped a clawed finger on his beloved book, The Cursed Girl.

Try. Try. Try.

Brivere sighed and ran a hand down his face. “Estuu, I am sorry.” he grunted. “It may have worked before, but I am too weak now. I am sorry that you have to see me so broken. Please, either come with me or don’t. It is alright if you stay, for I know that the Hylian Champion will take care of you.”

The golden knight kept walking, passing Estuu as the younger Zora stood in place. Brivere glanced over his shoulder at his younger brother. “I am sorry that I am nothing like Lorelei.” he said, voice barely above a whisper.

He absolutely hated the way his younger brother’s face fell. Link jogged up behind Estuu, leaning in to whisper something to him and patting the back of his armor. The scarlet Zora nodded before running back up to Princess Zelda and the Guard Captain. Brivere didn’t wait for Link, instead continuing to walk away as the Hylian ran up to his side.

“Do you intend to accompany me back to Prince Sidon?” the golden knight asked.

Link hesitantly shook his head. “Actually… I intend to make you go into Kakariko Village for help.”

Brivere instantly stopped and snapped his head to stare down at the sheepish Hylian. “You were the one who warned me of them in the first place, planting worry and anxiety within my mind!” the golden knight hissed. “And now, after I have gone through a horrid experience that confirmed your suspicions, you are going to just take it all back?!”

“Brivere, calm down!”

“No!” he shouted back. Brivere completely despised how hysterical he was becoming. How much of a weaker man he was reduced to. He didn’t even think it was possible to sink lower than he was before. “Why are you doing this? You should be happy that you were correct all along!”

Link grabbed onto Brivere’s long forefins, quickly pulling his face down so that his visor was practically touching the Hylian’s face. “I could never be happy if it meant that you were going to get hurt as a result!” Link yelled in his face.

Both of them panted, chests heaving in time with one another’s, trying to calm down. Finally, Link continued. “I wanted to be right so badly. But then, when we were breaking you out of the Yiga Clan hideout, I never wanted to be so wrong in my life. I wish that this had never happened, that none of this ever existed. Because then you never would have gotten hurt as a result of my carelessness.”

“Hylian Champion.” Brivere said softly. “It is not your fault. The blame lies on those who inflict pain for their own personal desires.”

Link gulped and nodded before letting go, allowing both of them to straighten up. “That is why you need to go to Kakariko Village. You nearly died, Brivere.” The Hylian’s voice became shaky, and he gulped before continuing. “I hate to admit it, but they may be the only ones who can help you, and I can’t risk putting off your safety for my own suspicions. The Sheikah are a double-edged sword; their knowledge and scientific skill can either save lives or ruin them.”

Brivere arched his brow, still forgetting that is was covered by his visor. “And what makes you so sure that I will receive the good end of that sword?”

Link stared back, determination blazing in his intense blue eyes. “Because I will be there. I promise to not leave your side for one second. I’ll make them explain any procedure they do to you and stop them if they don’t. No harm will come to you, and I won’t hesitate to kill them if they go too far. I swear to protect you for as long as I live. And that will be forever.”

The Hylian caught the hesitation that flashed across the golden knight’s face. “What?” he chuckled. “Do you not trust me anymore?”

Brivere’s lips twitched into a small smile and he shook his head. “No. I trust you.”

;

Princess Zelda and her personal knight were sitting on their knees in front of an old woman. The woman was perched on top of a mountain of red pillows while a child was bouncing around in place at the base of it. The Oracle Knight was knelt behind the Hylians, and the Holy Knight and the Guard Captain were stationed just outside the doors. With them was a nervous young woman who had had a difficult time telling them that her name was Paya. A faint sound of wind chimes could be heard in the background, accompanied with a flute that gently played a relaxing tune.

"Zeldy! It's been so long!" the little girl chirped, excitedly wriggling in place. The deadly glare that Link shot her and the one that princess Zelda shot back at him told Brivere that the child was perhaps more complex than he had initially thought.

Princess Zelda's face softened as she turned back to the small girl with a polite grin. "Yes Purah, it almost feels like it’s been one hundred years." She chuckled at her own joke while Link rolled his eyes. "I must say, you have aged quite well during all this time."

"You too Zeldy! Mine was more of an accident though. I was just trying to prolong my life so I could see you again! Failed experiment, you know?"

A cold stinging sensation began to seep into Brivere's stomach. Failed experiment? He was supposed to be seeking help from these people?

"Enough of that, Purah." The old woman said in a creaking, steady voice. "Our guests have clearly come for help."

Purah stamped her tiny feet and pouted. "That's the problem, little sis! Why don't people ever come to hang out?!"

Brivere gawked at the child from behind his visor. She was the older one?

Princess Zelda bowed her head. "I do apologize, Purah, and to you as well Impa.” The older woman nodded with a slight smile stretching on her wrinkled face. “While we stay in Kakariko Village and receive your help I promise to spend any free time catching up with you."

Jumping into the air, Purah pumped her fists and cheered. "Yay! I'm gonna hold you to that! Now, what's the problem?"

The Hylians turned to look at Brivere, who flinched slightly at the sudden attention. "This is the Oracle Knight, Brivere. He is the personal knight of Prince Sidon of the Zora Domain." Zelda explained. "We have brought him to you because of his worsening eye condition and for him to gain possible help controlling his ability to see the future."

The two Sheikah were now the startled ones. "Woah, he can see the future?!" Purah gasped. Before anyone could respond, she darted over to Brivere and snapped his visor open. He cried out in surprise and winced as the open air immediately stung his eyes.

In the blink of an eye, the girl suddenly slammed into the wall across the room. Brivere gaped at Link, who had thrown her and was now seething with anger. "Don't fucking touch him!" he spat.

Purah surprisingly got up and dusted herself off as if she had just tripped. "Oh, c’mon Linky! How are we supposed to help him if we can’t see what's wrong?"

The old woman cleared her throat and gazed at Brivere. "I do apologize for my older sister's brash actions. She is quite curious since she is a scientist, but that is no excuse for her behavior."

Brivere nodded in response, keeping his usual straight face. "It is quite alright. She meant no harm."

Link's chest was heaving as he glared at Purah. "Yeah, right."

Brivere grunted and pulled Link back, bringing him closer to his face. "Do not forget that this was your idea. Please be on your best behavior, for my sake." Sighing, the Hylian nodded and went back to sitting on his knees near Zelda.

“Now, young Zora,” the old woman crooned, “may you come closer so that I can examine your eyes?”

He nodded and got up, quickly walking between the Hylians and kneeling before the old woman, which almost put them at eye level. Brivere still had to tilt his head down as he lifted his visor so that Impa could get a better look.

Unlike Zelda, she didn’t flinch, much to his relief. His condition was the same as when the princess had taken a look at his eyes back in the throne room. However, he had noticed how much that his eyes had gotten much better ever since they had escaped the Yiga Clan hideout. But although his eyes had improved, he absolutely hated that his abusers had had anything to do with it. He would rather have the burning sting back than the mental wounds that would forever scar his mind.

Impa hummed and looked him over before gesturing for the golden knight to put the visor back on. “Fortunately, it is not so bad. I believe that it is caused by your inability to control your powers and see the future. Your mind is not ready, so it has been taking out all of the mental stress and excess magic on your eyes. And while it is somewhat stable now, I suspect that this condition could spread to the rest of your body if we do not do something.”

“Thank you for the insight, Lady Impa.” Brivere said, relieved. There was hope after all. “May I ask what you suggest we may do to try and improve my abilities, therefore my condition?”

Impa paused, muttering something to herself before gesturing for Purah to come to her. When the little girl sped over to the base of the pillow stack, they both leaned in towards each other and began to whisper in fast, hushed tones. Although Brivere was right next to them, he couldn’t catch exactly what they were saying.

Finally, they both nodded to one another, seemingly satisfied. Impa turned back to him with a kind smile. “Young man, we will need to see you use your abilities first. During this, we will try and detect exactly what the problem is and work from there. Depending on what we decide is a good solution, you may need to stay in our village for quite a while. Do you agree to these conditions?”

The golden knight nodded. “Should I try to do it now?”

“Yes, the sooner the better. Is there anything you need from us that may help?”

“No, I will be alright.” Brivere said, shaking his head. “I will just require some space so that I do not hurt anyone if something goes wrong.”

“Yay! This will be exciting!” Purah cheered. She darted around the room, moving tables and papers against the walls. Noticeably, when she teasingly pushed Zelda out of the way, she avoided coming near Link, who was still glaring her down. Everyone in the room went to stand by the stack of red pillows that Impa was sitting on top of as she gestured for Brivere to go to the middle of the room. He nodded and stood in the center, bracing himself for what was to come.

Releasing a tense sigh, he reached a clawed hand up and touched his father’s choker. The visions slammed into his mind harsher than usual, disorientating him so immediately that he instantly collapsed to the floor.

“Brivere!” Link shouted, rushing over to his side. He forced the golden hand off of the choker and cradled Brivere’s head in his lap as he tried to shake it off. “Are you alright?!”

He wanted to nod, but the golden knight knew that his friend would just be able to tell that he was lying. Instead, he just shook his head slightly and quietly cursed at himself.

Lady Impa watched with a concerned frown on her face. “Does it happen that fast every time?” she asked. “You almost passed out the second that you touched that choker. And does the choker have some sort of significance?”

Brivere sat up with Link’s help and looked over at the old woman, trying to regain his emotionless mask. He absolutely hated how quickly he had already collapsed. “Yes, the choker belonged to my late father, Prion. He was the first to have the ability to see the future, and that power was passed onto me by blood. His choker was apparently blessed by Hylia and helped strengthen his abilities. And as for the reaction time…”

His voice trailed off as he tried to force out the words that refused to come out of his throat, making a painful lump swell within it. “…No. It usually does not happen that fast. I used to hold out for at least an hour or more.”

Purah’s white eyebrows flew up. “Wow, really?! Did something happen recently to change how long you could resist it?”

Fear shot through his heart as his eyes nervously darted around the room. Link caught onto the way Brivere’s body had started to slightly tremble and spoke up in his place. “Yeah. We had a run in with the Yiga Clan. They were trying to use him for his abilities, and when we found him, he had been physically and mentally tortured for nearly a day.”

A genuinely sad whimper came from Impa. “Oh, my child… I am so sorry. We assure you that the Sheikah in this village absolutely despise those monsters.”

Brivere shook his head, trying not to let his labored breathing show. “No, it is alright. I have learned that your two clans are separate. I can cast no blame onto you, as the fault only lies with those who have inflicted pain onto me.”

“Such wise words!” Purah chirped. “But I think I know what’s wrong now.”

Everyone turned to gawk at the little girl, who was practically vibrating with energy. “Older sister, have you come to the same conclusion that I have?” Impa asked.

Purah excitedly nodded her head. “I think so!” She whipped around and pointed a small finger at Brivere, eagerly bouncing it up and down. “Your problem is that you’re too stuck in the past!” Purah suddenly shot her other hand out and snapped her tiny fingers together. “Snap!”

He stared back at her. “…I beg your pardon?”

“Yeah! Maybe that wasn’t the problem before you came here, but that’s definitely it now. You have been so conditioned to associate your ability with pain, and now the Yiga Clan, that it’s corrupted your powers! Not to get too deep, but you’ve been so focused on the past that it has prevented you from seeing the future!”

Link snarled at her. “What, is he just supposed to forget all the shit that happened to him?”

Impa shook her head. “No, Link. He just has to not let the past hold him back. It will be difficult, but it is very possible if he puts in the effort.” She turned to the golden knight with a regretful smile. “I also suspect that this may have been the case even before your heinous encounter with the Yiga Clan. Admittedly, we have done my research on you before you even came to us.”

Brivere gulped. “And what do you know about me?”

“That you have a difficult background,” the old woman said with a sad gleam in her eyes. “The son of a famous war hero who suddenly died without anyone even knowing of your existence until your mother stepped forward, claiming that she had married him on the battlefield. But with no real evidence, your family was humiliated and cast aside to the point that she committed suicide, leaving you to care for your younger brother on your own, as society had abandoned you both.”

She closed her eyes and gently shook her head. “I am sorry to bring up such tragic memories or that you even have them in the first place. Your background has imprisoned you for so long that now that you are free you don’t know what to do. The future was never even an option for you because your whole life used to be completely dictated by your past.”

Brivere let out a defeated sigh. “So what do you propose that I do?”

Purah was the one to speak up, voice suddenly serious and intense, her wide eyes immediately narrowing. “You must stay in Kakariko Village and practice using your abilities more. The goal is to try and make amends with the past that continues to haunt your every move and thought. I also suggest trying to figure out why you even want this ability in the first place, to give yourself motivation. Do you think you can do all of this?”

He looked over at Link, who smiled slightly and gave his arm a reassuring squeeze.

Closing his eyes, Brivere nodded his head. “Yes. I look forward to working with you.”

;

The first few days trying to settle down in Kakariko Village were hectic and confusing. They were probably going to be there for a while, because no one had any idea how long Brivere’s healing and practices would take. Impa and Purah had offered to try an ancient procedure that would alleviate the pain in his eyes, at least.

“Not gonna happen.” Link had growled at them, hand on his sword. They didn’t attempt to offer anything else after that.

In the meantime, they were given an empty house near the river that had been abandoned for some time. Brivere was given a few days to get used to his new environment before they actually tried anything, so they spent the time doing domestic chores like cleaning their new home or cooking meals, which was primarily done by Brivere.

True to her word, Princess Zelda spent most of her time catching up with Purah and Impa, who were so happy to see that she was alive after holding back the Calamity for so long. Eventually, she apologized to Brivere for having to suddenly leave; she needed to keep rebuilding her kingdom after accidentally abandoning it for over a century.

“It is alright, Princess Zelda.” he said to the princess as she got into a royal carriage that had come to fetch her. “I will forever be in your debt for your assistance and mercy. You may come to the Zora Domain any time to ask me of my powers to help your efforts.”

She smiled and nodded, but had a noticeably hollow look in her eyes as she glanced at Link, who was scowling at her from behind the golden knight. Princess Zelda didn’t say goodbye to her personal knight and instead ducked back into the carriage, everyone completely silent as it rolled away and out of sight.

Brivere still didn’t understand the tension between the two Hylians, but he decided not to push it as compensation for Link keeping his word to stay by him throughout this whole ordeal.

A letter had come by a Rito messenger that requested for the Guard Captain and the Holy Knight to return, as there was a sudden influx of monsters and raiders around the Zora Domain. Estuu had refused to go back, wanting to stay with his older brother, forcing Bazz to hesitantly agree to pass on the message. Before he left, the Guard Captain apologized to Brivere for everything that had happened on his watch. He was clearly sincere, and while the golden knight assured him that it was alright, he was also unsure if the Guard Captain meant the Yiga Clan encounter or the food rations incident all those years ago. Possibly even both.

Now that it was just his younger brother and his Hylian friend, Brivere couldn’t be any more satisfied than just spending days holed up in his new quaint home, with two of the few people he cared most about in the world. He and Link would often quietly talk as Estuu read the new Sheikah books available to him, and they wouldn’t do much other than cook meals or hunt. It was extremely relaxing, and Brivere was trying not to feel guilty for indulging in their company. The only thing that would have made it better was if Prince Sidon would have been there too.

But he found himself enjoying Link’s presence just as much as Sidon’s. It wasn’t as if he valued the Hylian over his prince and vice versa. The only way he could describe it was that it was just different. His companionship with Link was equally as important as his relationship with the prince. Neither was better or worse, satisfying or disappointing, or one more valuable than the other.

It was just different, yet the same altogether. And it frustrated him.

Brivere couldn’t fathom why he found himself looking at the Hylian every time they were in the same place, which was hard because they were almost always right next to each other, and he didn’t want Link to catch on and inevitably tease him for it. And, in the rare moments that they weren’t together, his mind always wandered off, thinking about what the Hylian was probably doing at that time. Both of them have been described as serious and stoic by others, but genuine laughter and smiles weren’t uncommon between the two of them. They spent the days watching over Estuu like their shared child, while also taking care of the house and each other.

He found himself thinking about the future for once. When Brivere was in the Zora Domain, he was always so busy being Prince Sidon’s knight or taking care of Estuu. And while he loved doing so, he never really had any goals for the future other than just that. He had spent years being told and thinking that he was worthless, so the future seemed to be something so distant and empty that it practically didn’t exist. His only purpose was to be the knight that would protect his prince and the older Zora that would take care of his younger brother. And for most of his life, he was content with being just that.

But as he sat there, talking to Link, with Estuu next to him reading The Cursed Girl, all of them sleepy after a good meal that he’d made and sitting next to a warm fire, he found himself thinking that he could get used to this. The only thing keeping him from wanting this to be the rest of his life was that Sidon wasn’t there to enjoy it as well.

Eventually their cozy domestic life had to slowly give way to what they were actually there for. He was surprised to feel himself hoping that he could have it again, if not now, then perhaps sometime in the future.

;

“Brivere, seriously, we can take a break.” Link said gently, handing Prion’s choker to Estuu, who was gazing at his older brother in concern.

The golden knight shook his head. “No, I can handle it.” he insisted.

Link and Estuu glanced at each other. The Hylian sighed. “Fine. Just one more time. But we aren’t going to put it on you yet, you need to prove that you can handle even touching it first.” With this, Estuu held the choker out to Brivere, who nodded and tentatively placed his hand on the smooth metal.

Fake Alon was suddenly standing over him as pain erupted all over his paralyzed body.

Brivere shouted and jerked back, nearly falling onto the floor before Link caught him. “Okay, that’s it!” the Hylian spat. “We’re taking a break and that’s final.”

He shook his head. “No, I nearly had it that time!”

“No, you nearly passed out that time!” Link shouted back. His body went rigid and he pinched the bridge of his nose he tightly shut his eyes. “Look, I know we have been at this for a week now. And I get that it might be frustrating that you haven’t made much progress yet. But you’ve already been through so much shit, you don’t need to give yourself more.”

Estuu nodded, setting the choker down in the corner of their shared room. He grabbed onto Brivere’s silver wrist cuff and whined as he tried to pull his older brother towards the door. The golden knight’s heart melted at the sweet gesture, and he sighed, nodding as he followed his little brother and Link out of the room and downstairs to the living room.

“How long do you two intend this break to last? It is important for me to practice more.” Brivere asked restlessly as he watched Link and Estuu roll out some blankets on the floor.

They both rolled their eyes and forced him to lay down with them. “As long as we need it to be.” Link grunted, shoving a book into his hands. Estuu had already cracked open The Cursed Girl as the Hylian laid back and closed his eyes.

Brivere hesitantly opened the book Link gave him, trying to focus on the words neatly printed inside. But even though his eyes were closely scanning the paragraphs and each letter loudly rang in his mind, he couldn’t recall anything that he had just read when he got a few pages in. Sighing, he set the book down and laid down next to Link, trying to close his eyes and just nap like the Hylian. But his thoughts were elsewhere, completely focused on the choker in the room just upstairs.

He awkwardly cleared his throat. “I apologize, but has it been enough time yet?”

Estuu’s golden eyes shot up from his book and glared at him.

“Brivere.” Link scowled, eyes still closed.

“…I apologize.”

His body twitched as he laid there, desperately wanting to just leave and practice his abilities a little more. Brivere could feel that he was so close to finally getting it right, to not being a disappointment to Prince Sidon and the rest of the Zora Domain, to fulfilling his role of Oracle Knight…

…To finally being as great as his father once was.

He had no idea how much time had passed as he waited for either Estuu or Link to speak up and agree to let him try again. Brivere scoffed to himself, finding it a bit hypocritical that this was supposed to be a break. If anything, he was more anxious and agitated than before. Laying here as Prince Sidon was waiting for him to return as his Oracle Knight was just a waste of all the effort that it had taken to get him to Kakariko Village in the first place.

Link’s snoring snapped him out of his downward spiral of worry. Although the Hylian was small, he certainly sounded as threatening as a Hinox when he slept. Even Estuu had nodded off, leaning against the side of the couch in their living room.

Wait.

Brivere quietly got up, carefully walking over the blankets and books scattered around his little brother and his Hylian friend. He cringed when the wooden stairs creaked beneath his feet but was relieved to find that it was quiet enough to not stir either of the sleeping people he loved below. Slowly, he crept back into the shared bedroom and found his father’s choker in the darkness, laying in the corner where Estuu had last left it. He reached out his hand, hoping to just be able to practice without waking Link or Estuu in the process.

The second his clawed finger touched the smooth metal, a bolt of pain shot up his back, as if someone had just sliced along his spine with a dagger.

Clasping a hand over his mouth, Brivere muffled a scream that thrashed around in his chest. As he waited for the waves of pain to subside, he quickly realized that this definitely wouldn’t work.

He said a silent prayer of apology to his late father before sliding his longsword under the choker, lifting it up by its straps. Carefully balancing it on the sword and trying not to touch it, Brivere carried the choker down the stairs and out the door, amazed that he hadn’t been caught yet.

Brivere rationalized his recklessness by thinking that the sooner he could gain full control of his abilities, the sooner they could leave. Estuu and Link wouldn’t have to put so much effort into someone like him. He could finally be a proper knight for Prince Sidon and protect him, protect the Zora Domain.

Because that’s all the value he could give to the world.

Brivere had no idea where he was going. It was already nighttime, and even if it hadn’t been, he wouldn’t have been able to navigate the village so well anyways. He had really only left the house to get more food for meals or to talk to Impa and Purah to report his progress, which was usually nothing. His feet just carried him wherever they felt was right, weaving his body through the trees that surrounded Kakariko Village. It took a moment for him to snap out of his daze and realize that he was far away enough to not run into anyone else.

Now out in the middle of the woods, Brivere slipped the choker off of his longsword and onto the ground with a satisfying thump. He crouched down, taking in a deep breath before hovering a trembling hand over the silver metal that shined in the moonlight from above.

He couldn’t even feel the cool metal under his fingers when they brushed against the choker. All he could sense were those Yiga Clansmen, ripping out his scales and tracing lines in his skin with daggers. A shriek ripped itself out of his throat, but he cut it off by gritting his sharpened teeth so hard that he could taste blood in his mouth.

Fighting through the visions of the past and future clashing against each other as they battled for dominance of his mind, he completely rested his hand on the choker and fought back against the darkness that instantly clouded his vision. With a vicious scream, he grabbed onto the choker with both hands and roughly forced it onto his writhing body, scratching and bruising his scales in the process.

Brivere didn’t even know if he had put the choker on correctly. Whether he had or not, he could feel the cool metal quickly burn up, a blaze of fire strapped onto his body, branding itself into him. And then he felt nothing, floating in another plane of existence altogether, watching himself thrashing on the hard dirt ground.

In this other place, all he could see was that horrendous symbol. A blinding white took over his vision, a blood red eye with a single tear falling to the heavens, a disgustingly sweet syrupy voice drowning out the thoughts in his head. Familiar stings of pain erupted in random parts of his body, slowly growing to a screeching crescendo until his whole being was buzzing in agony.

Visions of the future bombarded his mind, taking over his senses yet heightening them at the same time, making the memories of the Yiga Clan’s torture feel fresh. He could see everything and nothing, watching the world tear itself apart and build back up again, in a million different ways with an infinite number of people, over and over and over and over and-

“What the fuck are you doing?!”

A pair of hands roughly grabbed onto the choker, forcing it off of his seizing body. He panted as he stared back up at the person who had helped him, unsure if he was relieved or infuriated to see them.

Link’s icy blue eyes were ablaze as he glared down at Brivere. “What. The. Fuck.”

“Hylian Champion, I-!”

The Hylian threw the choker off to the side, grabbing onto his blond hair and angrily growling to himself. “Are you fucking insane?!” he shouted at Brivere. “Not only did you try it again against your own health, but you even went out to the middle of nowhere without telling anyone and even put it on all the way?! What is wrong with you?!”

Brivere’s distorted eyes narrowed as he slowly got up. “Nothing is wrong with me.” he growled. “We have just been wasting our time and effort with these useless breaks! I am so close!”

“Close to fucking dying!” Link screamed in his face. “Why the hell are you adamant about getting yourself killed?!”

“I am not trying to do so! If I perished, then I could not protect my lord!”

The Hylian’s blue eyes widened in disbelief and anger. “Is this what this is fucking about?” he said in an unsettlingly steady voice. “You want your abilities to work so badly just for someone else’s sake?”

“What else would they be for?!” Brivere shouted back. “Hylia gave the power to my father to protect our people! And as long as I don’t have control of it, I will not be able to carry on his legacy!”

Link jabbed a finger into the Zora’s chest, bruising some of the white scales with his strength. “Then take care of yourself first! You can’t fucking protect anyone if you’re dead!”

Both of them furiously panted inches away from each other’s faces. Link was the first to break the silence, glaring Brivere down with fiery blue eyes. “You know, I think this is why I fuckin hated you when I first met you.” he spat.

The golden knight snarled back. “And what reason would that be?”

“You’re just like I used to be. Thinking that you had no purpose in life other than being someone else’s sword and shield, made to be broken for their own protection.” Link lowered his hand and scowled at the golden knight. “At least I eventually grew out of it.”

His words hit their mark. Brivere visibly flinched, cringing at how true they rang in his heart. “…Even so, perhaps that is all I am. There is no shame in it. If I have no worth other than to be a sword, then I may as well use it to protect someone I love.”

Link angrily shook his head. “Listen to yourself. I used to think that way too, okay? I was literally referred to as the Goddess’s sword, for Hylia’s sake! All I was made to do was to live and die on this earth to protect Princess Zelda and eventually the rest of Hyrule.”

Brivere laughed incredulously. “And you call lashing out at her in anger protection?”

The Hylian shook his head, letting out a heavy sigh that made his shoulders sink. “I-okay, look. Maybe it wasn’t right of me to do so. But she left me out in the world with no help. I had to claw and fight for my life, trying to find some sense of worth in my life other than to suffer and die for the sake of people I didn’t even know. And then when I broke Zelda out, she just expected me to fall in line and obey her unquestionably, even though I couldn’t even remember her.”

Link laughed, but there was no humor in it. “All because I used to have some useless title as Knight. I didn’t get why I should have to die for someone I didn’t even care or know about, and things between us just went down from there.”

Brivere nodded. He supposed that he could understand. While it didn’t excuse Link’s vitriol towards the well-meaning princess, it at least made sense.

“But this isn’t about that.” Link said. His sharp blue eyes were slowly turning soft. “Brivere, why can’t you just accept that you are worth so much more than you think? Not just to me, but to Estuu, and to Sidon, and to so many other people?”

The golden knight let out a sarcastic chuckle. “So many other people?”

A small grin twitched on Link’s face. “You know what I mean, you asshole.”

Brivere sighed and relaxed his body. He was suddenly so tired. “You know of my past.”

The Hylian nodded, gesturing for him to elaborate. And so he did. “Quite simply… people can be ruthless. They did not hesitate to tear into a helpless woman and her son when they suspected that she could be lying, never giving her a chance to really prove herself. They did not waste a second before tormenting us to the point that my own mother thought that it would be fine to suddenly die and leave me on my own, in charge of a child no less. And I was a child too.”

He suddenly staggered forward and Link caught him, gently setting both of them into the grass. He turned his head to cradle it in the Hylian’s soft chest. “And in all honesty, I couldn’t blame her. I considered it myself, sometimes. There is no value in being the son of a lie, at least that’s what everyone else said. So, there was no worth I could give to the world anyways.”

Brivere shuddered from the memories that were forcing themselves to resurface. The lonely nights. The taunting, the mockery. Eyeing his mother’s bottle of poison and wondering how much it would take to do it. “But I couldn’t do it. No one would have been there to take care of Estuu.”

He could feel Link’s smile on his head fin. His voice was slightly muffled, as his head had leaned onto Brivere’s. “Even then, you only found your worth in keeping others alive.”

“…I suppose.”

The Hylian sighed, making the scales on the back of Brivere’s neck tingle at the sudden warm breeze. “So, is this why you want your ability so badly?”

“…Yes.” Brivere hesitantly admitted. He had never told anyone else any of this before.

But he trusted Link.

“It is as you said.” he murmured into Link’s soft tunic. It smelled nice. “I am nothing but a tool for those above me to use. No one gave me the time of day until I groveled and fought for the position of the First Knight. And even then, I was still worthless. Perhaps it is selfish of me, but this new ability of mine… I was finally given value. I was finally validated. It feels like my existence actually means something for once.”

They sat there in silence, listening to the faint sound of chimes as a gentle breeze swayed through the air. Link was the one to break the calm. “You need to work on thinking more of yourself.”

Brivere tried to shake his head, but stopped when he felt Link’s voice tremble against his head tail. “Because I think you’re worth the whole world.”

Stunned, Brivere lay against Link with his eyes open wide. “How can you say that?”

His scales shivered when Link chuckled into them. “When I was off fighting the Calamity, I wasn’t being that heroic, I admit. I didn’t give a damn about most of the people in Hyrule. They always treated me just as the Goddess’s sword, a weapon just to be broken in order to protect them. Nothing more.”

The Hylian’s rough voice suddenly went soft. “But I was thinking about the few people who treated me as a real person, as Link. They meant the world to me, so I was willing to give the world to them.”

Link tilted Brivere’s face up, making his distorted eyes focus on the soft blue ones staring back at him. “And I found myself thinking of you.” he whispered right above Brivere’s mouth.

Every time they would think about this moment later on, be it days or years later, neither of them would be able to recall who leaned in first.

When their lips touched, Brivere finally understood what the Sheikah elders had been telling him. Perhaps it was difficult to let go of the past, and perhaps it would take a long time to get over it. Possibly, he never would. But that didn’t mean that he could allow himself to stay anchored back there forever. He had to consider the future, to accept all of the good things that came to him, to believe and have hope that the horrors of the past would not be all that there was to life.

And as Brivere sat there, kissing a man he used to absolutely despise, he realized that he was willing to let go of any past aggression with Link if it meant that he could have a loving future with his beloved Hylian.

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