#tw:self hate

[voidselfshipp]

Whenever you need me

Cw: stuff about self doubt,self hate , and insecurities

Ok to rb

GIF warning flashing lights.

Summmary:ace is having a hard time loving himself, his partner decides to do something about it

♡~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~♡

The only thing illuninating the dark, expensive looking bedroom was the light of a phone, and the ocasional lightining that struck the midnight Sky,clouded And dark.

The big Windows moved with the unforgiving air of the outside, the city below bustling with loud and obnoxious life, unaware of a Man hiding, tormented by his own doubts And issues.

Ace sighed under the light Teal fluffy covers, refreshing his Instagram page,to be met with the same posts.

Red puffy eyes close, his forehead meeting the comfy pillow.

A broken sigh scaped his mouthas he gripped his phone.

He suddenly feels a hand softly caressing his back over the blankets.

He looks up and is met with gentle green eyes that look at him worried.

In their lap a fancy tray with equally fancy cuttlery, two teacups,a porcelain kettle and pastries.

--Are you okay?--they asked as ace sat up covering his face with his unicorn onsies hood.

--Ah jerico...I didnt mean to bother you..--he said hugging his partner.

--You dont bother me havard...i want to make sure youre okay, i heard you sobbing and I got worried...--jeri hands him a Cup of tea,sitting on his lap.

The Man took a sip of the warm tea, and kissed jeris cheek.

--What is It?--they asked.

Ace looked away--im never enough...am I?Im always trying to be perfect...and i never get it right!

Jericos brows furrowed as lighting struck the Sky mercilessly.

--Oh havi...--they said cupping their fiancés cheek.--you cant be perfect...theres no such thing as perfect...youre you,and thats fine...youre beautiful being yourself...youre brave, altruisitc and so so handsome...you make my life easier...

Ace smiled softly and kissed them, hugging them tightly with his teacup resting on the tray.

His hand goes to the back of their neck as they pull him closer.

They part lips , panting and foreheads pressing togheter.

--Thank you...--havard said-- I love you...

Jeri smiled kissing the tip of his nose, and his forehead--i love you too.

Ace took a photo of what jerico brought him, and uploaded it with the caption "babes taking care of me"

When they finished eating they went to bed, jeri resting ontop of the Mans chest, who hugged their waist.

They press a kiss to his jaw and then smiles as havard purss.

--youre always taking care of me-- ace said-- thank you

--Im always going to be here for you amor, whenever you need me

The Man closed his eyes with a smile, thinking of ways to repay his loved one for all the good things they had done for him.

Needless to say jerico was going to get New fancy clothes tomorrow.

[signless-survives-au]

>be the iron-blooded revolutionary

TW: Self-hatred,Vague Descriptions of Gore,General Bad Times

You have failed at every point in your life, completely flunked every attempt to live up to your own tenure except for maybe a few lucky times. You have failed to be smart about what you say-You let your preaching get so out of hand it caught the attention of the high-bloods. You have failed to pick out good people to befriend-Befriending the Neophyte Legislator gave her a perfect way to track you. You have failed to be a good son-You disobeyed your mother's orders to keep your head low and stay safe time and time again. You have failed to be a good leader-Your followers are dying. You have failed to be a good friend-Your *friends* are dying because you decided to listen to some crazy visions that would've made you cullbait even if your filthy blood didn't already. And perhaps most obviously you've failed to be a good person. Blaming your stupid actions on the fact that you followed a daydream rather than the fact that you're selfish and utterly stupid. No-one held you at gunpoint saying."Follow your inane visions or else!" You did that and let thousands straight to their deaths.

>Look into the crowd

There are some faces you recognize by bond, your moirail, Mituna, your love, Bastet, your mother. And some whose reputations proceed themselves. Neophyte Legislator Eadala (Traitor!), GHB himself-Man you really pissed him off. Damn-even THE Mindfang showed up along with the Orphaner and the Condensce herself. All those singers and actors can eat their blood-pushers out, you've reached true celebrity status! All these important highbloods came out to watch little old you croak. You'd almost blush if it weren't from the bloodloss. Speaking of blood loss, you're currently suffering the double whammy of fashionably painful red-hot irons and a fancy accessory of an indigo arrow to the chest. Jegus fuck, you'd scream if you weren't so tired.

>>Hours pass

The irons have cooled a bit. You can tell because you're able to slump just a bit despite your legs starting to give out without much further damage to your wrists. The crowd has dispersed a bit, probably bored at how slow your death's been so far. Eh, you won't give them the satisfaction of making it more interesting.

>>More hours pass

The arrow in your chest didn't hit anything vital, but the fact that it's stuck in your chest is still a giant pain in the ass.

>The night ends, the sun will be up soon

The crowd is gone. Your friend, your lover, your mother. Dragged away by their captors to who knows where. The one indigoblood, the one who had enough mercy to spare Baset, and also the one who's name you can't remember, so you'll call him Darkleer for now-Grabs your chains and unlocks them, letting you fall to the ground. As much as you'd love to give him another kick to the knee, you both know you can't fight-Too small, too weak, too untrained, too tired to do anything but slump to the ground and try to steady your blood-pusher's beat to keep yourself alive. Then he just picks you up over his shoulders and starts walking. Your vision blurs at the edges, not gifting you with the lecherous grafting of knowledge your second sight has given you, just going dark as you listen to the sounds of footsteps. Soft, heavy sounds this time, not like the nigh-constant sharp screams of the sweeps past.

[hannimati0ns]

[•••]

[notforonesecond]

Emmerdale Character SL aesthetics // Aaron & Coming out.

It`s better blokes are hating me for robbing their car than for trying to get it on with them!

@whatdiknow

[im-the-strongest-blog]

@vanderwood-stark He’s been screaming for the last ten or so minutes, plates and glasses laying smashed on the kitchen floor as he shakes at the other end of the kitchen, eyes wide and alert, acting very much like the cornered animal that he currently felt like he was. One hand was curled up within his hair, breathing hard and laboured while his other hand held tightly onto a large kitchen knife that he currently pointed out towards Vanderwood, as though daring him to get any closer. These type of outbreaks had been getting rarer in nature - this had to be the worst he’d been in a while. All because of some stupid nightmare. All because of memories that didn’t wish to vanish, which never would. He was a monster. He would forever be a monster. Why did people try to pretend otherwise!? Why did people want to help someone like him? No... no not help. Just use. Always use. That’s all he was to people. A tool. Always a tool. Manic laughter escaped. If Vanderwood was saying anything it wasn’t currently being registered by the crazed redhead. Ignoring the way that the china and glass cut into his bare feet, Saeran suddenly dashed across to the other side of the room, knife held tightly in both hands as he attempted to strike deep into Vanderwoods side. Destroy before you can be destroyed...

[purplenerd777]

personal

*does a self check* huh, i sure am feeling a lot of self loathing for this early in the semester

[southernxwolf]

Do you like who you are right now?

I’m..getting there. I don’t hate myself as much as I did several months ago at least, that’s something. I’m a work in progress, but who isn’t?

[veritasqui-a]

12

Angry Drabble

It’s your fault again.

Curtains were drawn to keep herself hidden from the warmth of the sun. Eyes adjusted to the darkness she felt more familiar with than anything else. Arms were tight against the knees Blake brought to her chest, hoping to suffocate the rampant thoughts in her mind.

It didn’t help.

The swaying vessel in the ocean only brought the imagined pushing and shoving of a terrible world around her. Scraping by to get on this ship, changing her wardrobe so she was less recognizable... and now she was returning home like the wounded kitten she was.

You could have warned them.

Phantom pains burned like fresh flames. Fingers dug into her skin. Regret was a potent toxin and it was forever lingering in her own shadow.

Should have told them, but you didn’t.

Nightmares were a harsh reminder, every night it was the same trauma. Every evening was the echoes of personal disdain and emotional anguish. Hate was a familiar foe, but it was the words of a wise man to keep those enemies closer, was it not?

Negligence is deadly.

Blake was her own worst enemy. Nothing had changed in years, except for the trail of unresolved catastrophes behind her. All of them embodied in the face of one man who refused to be stopped. The personification of a sickening obsession that would suffocate everything and anything in it’s way.

She could not face them. Wrong committed to a degree that was undeserving of forgiveness. Vanishing became a natural habit, and now it was only just to retreat to the only place she could think of. A hole where she thought no one knew to follow her and one where she could face the rage she expected. Her parents were people she could take the brunt of a few hours of upset words from. It would have been nothing in comparison.

She had abandoned one family only to return to her own. Blake wanted someone else to hate, someone else to be infuriated, something else to scream at her in her ears.

Her own rage was going to have to suffice.