Reflection
I used to believe that I could do everything on my own. I used to believe that I did not need help and that I would accomplish my biggest dreams and conquer my biggest fears on my own with no help from anyone. I heard about TWLOHA a long time ago and that story intertwines with a story of a good friend of mine. Back then, I didn't realize what it all meant. Right then, the mission was about getting help for issues of depression, anxiety, self-injury, thoughts of suicide. And if I am being honest, it took up until I started college and started our UChapter to be fully aware that it is so much more than that. Those things are extremely important, but this is also about community. This is about people.
I think that one of the beautiful things about this organization is that it has a different meaning for every person who hears about it, but there is a larger shared purpose. We all have something in common. We are all human and we need other people. We are united in the unknown, whichever way we happened to get to that unknown, we have the opportunity to find other people there.
I no longer believe that I can do this on my own. I have learned that life is hard. It's even harder attempting to do it alone.
There is power in relationships and community. We were not meant to do life alone. We also know that we are all capable of relating to pain. We know what it's like to feel stuck and have questions of what does this mean and where am I going? Who am I? We don't know the answer to these questions most the time. And if we do, there is a good chance they will change. College is full of these questions. Life is full of transitions and changes. The answers to these questions are very fluid. It's easy though to say you are who you are, and you are these adjectives. It's easy to say well depression is an imbalance of neurotransmitters in your brain and it's easy to offer suggestions to people. Get more sleep, exercise more, eat healthier, do something you love. Often times these facts and suggestions don't truly answer our questions. Unfortunately, we don't have a lot of answers to these questions. What the hell is a neurotransmitter? And why is that my neurotransmitters want to be imbalanced? These questions are much deeper than that.
With that being said, I do truly believe that we don't always have to have all the answers. Being able to sit down with your friend, your mom, your dad, your sister, your brother, your roommate and crying about the frustrations and being able to say yeah, this hurts a lot is much more important than having the answers. Being able to say it's not fair and it hurts, but you know what? I am here for you. If you need to cry or scream about things I am here for you. Let me walk through this with you. I will walk with you to see a therapist. I will sit with you when you don't feel like being alone. We can cry together when we are having bad weeks and we can have conversations, really difficult conversations about things that are not fair. We can be honest about our pain and we can be honest about saying that it's okay to ask for help. Honest conversations about life and pain are not easy. But in some way they are beautiful, because they suggest that we need other people and they remind us that someone else has gone through pain and that they can relate to this thing we felt isolated in. These conversations remind us that we are important and that we deserve wonderful things. We can be forgiven for our past and we can be hopeful for our future.
Last night, we got the opportunity to host a Hope-n-Mic Night. We had some incredibly talented people share their stories through their art. Whether it was stand up, poetry, spoken word, or music each person got to add their voice to a larger story. While we were planning the event we said, as long as it affects 1 person it was worth it. It was more than worth it. I was moved last night by the honesty and conversations that occurred. So thank you. Whoever you are, whether you performed, you bought a cupcake, you hung out with us, you had conversations with us, or you were with us there in spirit. Thank you.
-Molly Walter
TWLOHA-WU Co-President