#txf shitpost

[chaoticpurplegreengremlin]

cgb spender and the cgb stands for Cigarette Guy Bignaturals

[tiramare]

mulder’s just happy to be there (original meme under the cut!)

[sentientsky]

when your wife’s busy, what else is there to do but fling pencils into the ceiling and draw hearts around her official fbi id photo????

[paper-crowns-and-tiaras]

Happy Birthday 🎵SpecialAgentDanaKatherineScully🎵

This is why all she got for a cake was a Snoball :(

[enoughslices]

QUEEQUEG 2: The Queequeging

Rating: T Pairing: Mulder/Scully Word Count: 913 words Summary:

The exclusive new trailer for A24's upcoming horror film. Queequeg's so back! Or: a silly little invincible/immortal Queequeg horror comedy parody for Two Cakes Fest!

Read it on AO3!

Tagging: @today-in-fic, @twocakesficfest In case links break: https://archiveofourown.org/works/60225349

[crossedbeams]

How to almost apprehend a child snatcher

by Special Agent Fox Mulder assisted by Special Agent Dana Scully MD 

# 1 Make looking look seksi with lots of creeping and holding your torch like you’re a kung fu master.

#2 Turn your back to open doors so you can get concussed down the stairs. 

#3 Let the assailant do all the cool action shots with a definitely not dummy kid strapped to them to add ethical dilemma.

#4 Run like the wind from a squat so the wind of justice can catch your hair.

#5 And when all hope is fading, run like you can catch that car. Because you are a champion and this will definitely make it easier to explain to your boss. Yep. 100%

[haunt-me-x3]

mulder its meme

[sentientsky]

i haven’t seen a single episode of x-files in its entirety. but this is canon because i said so. i’m chris carter btw xoxo