#tyson quotes

[showtimeboxing]

June is #MikeTysonMonth because you can’t think about the past 30 years of boxing without thinking about Mike Tyson. 

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me: hey tyson can u check my temperature tyson: *feels my forehead* im sorry but ur gonna die u have cancer me: thanks

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dubai is just a glitch in the matrix, its not real,

@bloodandcumstains

“dubai is just a social construct” - @thenoorwhal

[invaderslim508]

I'm on that Zoloft shit, right? But I'm only on THAT to keep me from killing Y'ALL

Mike Tyson

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i cant understand tyson?????

“wheres me durries cunt. gotta go down to the servo in me thongs and me singis with bazza and get some maccas” - @bloodandcumstains

@jakemorph please translate for us, thanks

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Tyson, aka @bloodandcumstains, aka an australian guy: so, like, they got me to read a really australian version  of the cheeky nandos meme in an australian accent and--

Me: so, basically, u just read it

Tyson: Yeah

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I can cry on command. At first the tears just happen and then I'm left to wonder if it's because my eyes have a problem or it's just my crippling self hatred inside my soul

@bloodandcumstains

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Me: What do u think i am, organized?

Tyson: well now i think you're a comedian 'cause you're a smartass