#uk issues

[possiblyunhinged]

Ok, I know this is going to sound a bit different from my usual rants about people blaming the working class for everything, but I SWEAR TO GOD—can we PLEASE put out a nationwide PSA for people to STOP BUYING DOGS THEY CAN’T FUCKING TAKE CARE OF?

In an ideal world, there would be legislation around dog ownership, but when the government can't even fucking work out how to sort out the appalling situation of dog breeders in the UK, what hope does that idea have.

FYI, banning the sale and advertisements of dogs online that aren't through official channels such as the Kennel Club or rescues would be a start.

I don’t care if it’s an XL Bully, a cocker spaniel, or one of those designer mixes you saw on Instagram. I don't care if you think your dog is a perfect little prince. It’s beyond a joke at this point. The fact that there are zero real consequences for letting your untrained, chaotic dog run wild off-leash in public spaces is driving me up the wall.

I don’t care if “Fang” once smiled at a child. Dogs are not magical therapy creatures here to fix your problems. They’re animals with instincts and behaviours that don’t just vanish because you sprinkle good vibes all over them.

Just because a conversation is uncomfortable doesn’t mean it’s not necessary. A dog’s breed matters. Having the finances to properly care for your dog matters. Building a lifestyle where you’re not disappearing for hours and leaving your dog alone for too long matters.

What’s happening in the UK right now is maddening.

And fundamentally, it's cruel to dogs. So many dogs are not having their needs met because they were a naive (at best) purchase. It's so fucking unfair to them. I'm so tired of seeing lazy argument after lazy argument surrounding legislation being put in place without talking about the real issue - many people in the UK are buying dogs they can not look after.

I love my dogs more than anything. The thought of living without them genuinely hurts. But I drag my agoraphobic ass out of bed every day to walk them for up to two hours, and I train with them daily because they’d be bored out of their minds otherwise. If I didn’t think I could give them the happy, fulfilling lives they deserve, I wouldn’t have gotten them.

Here’s the truth people don’t want to hear and will find ways to make out this is cruel to say, when it's the reality of looking after a living, breathing animal: owning a dog means you WILL spend THOUSANDS in their lifetime, on their care—vet bills, unexpected illnesses, trainers for trauma or behaviour issues. That’s the reality. If you’re not ready to take that on, then don’t get a dog.

The number of absolute muppets I see picking up high-energy working breeds “because my mate has one” is embarrassing. Working dogs need purpose, activity, and training. They're sentient, living things that should be treated with no less consideration than a human if they are yours.

And don’t even get me started on Cavapoos and Cockapoos. They’re EVERYWHERE—ticking time bombs of health issues. They’re not plushies, they’re intelligent, active animals that require care and attention.

The amount of people who gleefully tell me what 'nutters' their dog is when it's actually being driven up the wall by boredom is infuriating.

Dogs are not accessories or band-aids to your feelings of inadequacies. They’re living beings with needs. If you can’t meet those needs, don’t fucking get one.

[dread-red-queen]

Patreon confuses me

Ok I am so confused right now, I just got a mobile notification telling me thanks for verifying my ID my account is restored. but yesterday it said they failed to verify ID and my account was blocked, MAKE UP YOUR DAMN MIND, I rage asked for my account to be deleted last night as I gave up thinking I couldn't unlock my account as the say they failed to verify my ID, I even clicked unpublish my page, I have no idea if my Patreon even exists now or if in a few days it will be deleted WTF

has anyone had issues like this setting one up from the UK???

[wild-at-mind]

TW- murder, transphobia, racism, incarceration, suicide

I remember in 2018 (I think that was the year) I went to a TDoR vigil at the cafe in the next city over, which at the time was the source of much of my LGBTQ connection, along with a meetup group I attended in the same area. The vigil ceremony was not ideal in many ways- some local reporters talked over part of the address, and during the name reading it was clear that the Latin American names were being pronounced wrongly. In the UK it can be harder to find someone who is culturally connected to Latin America who could do the reading or at least advise than it might be in the US, so I don’t know if they would have ever been perfect, but it seemed that pronunciation had not been even checked and it was really noticeable. But while there is room for improvement I still think it’s an overall good that this vigil happened.

The gathering in the cafe beforehand was better. I was very tentatively exploring my gender stuff back then, and being around so many trans and nonbinary people of all ages was very powerful. I remember seeing a group of older trans women who looked weary and tired talking at one of the tables.. or perhaps they were cross dressers. The line between them can be blurred, especially in older generations. And being a male cross dresser who doesn’t identify as a trans woman does not protect you from violence. One of the murder victims on the TDoR list this year is Jimmie ‘Jay’ Lee, a black self identified gay man in the US who was murdered while wearing women’s clothing. https://tdor.translivesmatter.info/reports/2022/07/08/jimmie-jay-lee_lafayette-county-mississippi-usa_348b20a4  Plenty of historical transfemme people identified variously as cross dressers or drag queens as well as trans women. I’m hardly the first to say this but I hope that an obsession with correct labelling in the LGBTQ community does not mean the important things get ignored.

At that 2018 gathering before the vigil the cafe was packed, full and standing. I felt a sense of community with people there suddenly, even though I didn’t know most of them, because I felt we were all coming together for something bigger than ourselves. I think it’s easy for something as personal and identity based as gender to become very inclosed in our own heads, especially for the comparitively privileged (Western, white, ok financially) and that’s something I’ve found difficult. For me at least, because of these things that I have and the comfort they provide, it can feel self indulgent to focus on myself. Coming together in this outward focusing way with so many trans and nb people at that time was incredibly moving and poweful. Especially important to me is that it had nothing to do with the kind of awkward self flaggellation that self conscious white queer communities can end up doing when trying to support people much more marginilised. I hate that this seems to be so inescapable sometimes. Though maybe that was a misguided view as I later saw an overview of some of the criticism of TDoR on wikipedia: https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Transgender_Day_of_Remembrance  in the Reception section. (It uses a lot of language about ‘bodies’ rather than people, a language choice which I have seen pushback on recently from black people especially, so warning for that.) As a way to honour trans and gender nonconforming people who were murdered or took their own lives, it is vastly imperfect, as we saw from the badly done reading of the names I talked about earlier. It’s ok for things to be imperfect and nuanced, and I hope I will make an effort to actively learn more about these issues. It’s common for activists for a particular cause to be asked to think of and draw attention to related injustices, and I think TDoR should be no different. Starting in the UK, where I live, the story of Taylor really gripped me. Taylor was a trans man who in prison serving an IPP, Indeterminate sentence for Public Protection. He was in a situation where he had served 10 years over his initial sentence, due to the nature of the IPP, and had no release date. They no longer give out these sentences, presumably because they are inhumane, but they were not retroactively repealed. I encourage you to read more here: https://tdor.translivesmatter.info/reports/2022/07/09/taylor_wotton-under-edge-gloucestershire-united-kingdom_87fabb44 and here: https://iwoc.iww.org.uk/free-taylor/ (Note- this was written before Taylor’s death.) Taylor took his life in prison while under an insufficient suicide watch. Transphobia was one of the problems he faced in his life but it was one of many, and all were exacerbated by him being locked up for so long. This makes me want to learn more about UK prison advocacy- we have the highest rate of prison suicide in the world according to the IWOC link there, and that horrified me. A homeless man in my hometown who to be honest was mainly known for acting strangely in public (shouting in megaphone while wearing odd outfits- mildly annoying I guess but harmless) was jailed for one of those ‘crimes’ they get homeless people for, and soon after he took his life in prison. There was a shrine to him in the town centre when the news came. His name was Lee and they called him Superman because that was one of his outfits. It made me think of him and how fucked up the system is, if he hadn’t been locked up he could still be alive.

Got a bit rambly there. I hope it made sense. Sending my love to all trans and gender nonconforming people today. And I hope I can focus on the wider issues in UK society in the name of the amazing trans people I know, for the love of humanity and people of all kinds in our country.

[mithrandilff]

For those living in the UK, write to your local MPs asking them to condemn the actions of Trump, stop sales of tear gas and rubber bullets to the US, and now the report on the disproportionate number of BAME deaths has been published to push for answers. My friend provided this link which I have just summarised and provides an outline of what to include and how to set out your letter/email. You will need your full postal address.

You can find their information online whether it be email or postal

https://docs.google.com/document/d/1P7owSv_blKdVaAzII-ySKpk1Vo7w2c_mpE4wUSmRPBQ/mobilebasic

[silly-storm-chaser]

Let's face it. '21 is going to be grim from UK

I am scared to see how much our government is going to fuck things up now it has more power.

I hope everyone looks after themselves, because this year is going to be rough.

Once again, fuck brexit and everything it stood for.

[mzyraj]

Funding for men’s therapy

So I’ve been seeing and reblogging various US bullshit, but have happened across some UK bullshit in my real life that I feel I must raise awareness of for feminist/general moral purposes.

So, I have a male friend who I knew had long term emotional and psychological problems going on; PTSD, depression, social anxiety, etc. He was initially referred to a specialist by his GP, but was then told that the NHS didn’t fund treatment for his specific situation anymore so he’d have to pay for therapy himself. Shame though it is, we all know the NHS gets cash-strapped and so I didn’t think much of it - I didn’t know what the actual cause of his issues were.

He finally opened up to me about that. He was a victim of child sex abuse (and also severe bullying). Now that’s terrible regardless, but here’s the thing: apparently, if he were a woman, the therapy would have been funded. Due to all of his health things he cannot work or afford therapy himself, so it’s not like it’s more affordable for him either.

Now I would probably argue that an adult male rape/sexual assault victim/survivor should get as much funded therapy as an adult female victims/survivor anyway, but when they were a kid? Kids are kids. Kids are vulnerable. He’s not a child now, but why effectively assume that a man would need it less?

Not to mention that the benefits assessors are behind the times in recognising the impact of mental health things on ability to work vs physical health stuff, so they were trying to force him into the rigamarole of applying for jobs and interviews without any psychological support for his problems (he couldn’t afford his full rent, nevermind private therapy). Fortunately he’s now won an appeal after being reassessed so he’ll have a bit more money.

But that’s not really the point. Men already tend to be behind the curve on asking for help, we don’t need to dissuade them in this way, like only women and girls can/should be traumatised by (sexual) abuse. My friend’s been teetotal for a while now, but he almost drank himself to death (literally) first trying to deal with his problems.

If we want equality we need to treat people equally. If we want to reduce male suicide, we need to be just as prepared to treat their issues when they need it. I don’t know what these NHS funders are playing at.

[spacebar-13]

Happy fucking Bonfire Night

Let's commit arson, make a model of a REAL PERSON and burn it and celebrate that we just fantasised about commiting murder, all whilst setting off fireworks that cause pets to freak the fuck out, and people with sensory issues to panic. My point is.. please dont set off fireworks or bonfires, just light some sparklers and call it a night.