If you don't know who I am (or my paras are), that's okay! All the info you need to make a random decision is below the fold! Feel free to click button. (or, click a para's tag to know more about them)
Who's the Better/Your Favorite Para?
Caleb Booth
Ash Sinclair-Parker
Voting ended onJan 10
Caleb Booth
He/Him; Generation 0 and Millennial
Fun Fact: At first Caleb was incredibly giggly about generative AI because it was kind of sold to us like the sci-fi future of Caleb's dreams (like… chat robot that's incredibly easy to befriend? amazing). Sadly, he very quickly realized that anything sold as a utopia is actually a dystopian hellscape and now Caleb is sad. And probably should've seen this coming. And is incredibly critical of any video of birds sledding now. And will often send posts to his husband, Liam, for a reality check (Liam tells Caleb to send it to their daughter, Luca, because how would Liam know??).
Ashe Sinclair-Parker / Asher Sinclair
They/He/She; Generation 2 and Gen Beta
Fun Fact: Asher plays the drums!!! He started playing percussion for his band class in middle school, and then pretty quickly joined the youth band for his church. And of course, his favorate time to practice is like 1am because why wouldn't it be (it's okay his family still adores him).
If you don't know who I am (or my paras are), that's okay! All the info you need to make a random decision is below the fold! Feel free to click button. (or, click a para's tag to know more about them)
Who's the Better/Your Favorite Para?
Marcie Thiebault
Ash Sinclair-Parker
Voting ended onFeb 5
Marcie Thiebault
She/Her; Generation 2 and Gen Beta/Gamma
Fun Fact: Marcie wouldn't at all identify as creative herself, but she has a controlled obsession with watching performance art. She has a love for the avant-garde and will happily watch pieces over and over until Marcie thinks she understands what the artist is going for (or an interpretation all her own that Marcie thinks is much better).
Ashe Sinclair-Parker / Asher Sinclair
They/He/She; Generation 2 and Gen Beta
Fun Fact: Asher's favorite animal is whatever chaos goblin is currently circulating on the homosexual internet. Ferrets, raccoons, possums... yeah, she adores cats, but spiritually she's a chaos tube mixed with a trash panda.
If you don't know who I am (or my paras are), that's okay! All the info you need to make a random decision is below the fold! Feel free to click button. (or, click a para's tag to know more about them)
Who's the Better/Your Favorite Para?
Gianni Salvatore
Ash Sinclair-Parker
Voting ended onDec 13, 2025
Gianni Salvatore
He/Him; Generation 1 and Gen-Z/Alpha
Fun Fact: Gianni is a huge Formula One fan and tries to take his family to at least one race a year. Since they're in Michigan, he also tries to go to the Indy 500 when he can, but it's not his priority.
Ashe Sinclair-Parker / Asher Sinclair
They/He/She; Generation 2 and Gen Beta
Fun Fact: Ash has been out to their family as genderfluid/trans since they were four years old. She was shopping with her family and started bawling when her dad, Finn, wouldn't let her have a Princess Belle costume (it was the wrong size; Finn bought her the right one). Over the next few months, Ash started getting mad at gendered terms, and her parents eventually decided to play it by ear/day-to-day. Now, she's entirely out to her extended family, but still chooses to go by he/him pronouns at school, or when other kids are around.
If you don't know who I am (or my paras are), that's okay! All the info you need to make a random decision is below the fold! Feel free to click button. (or, click a para's tag to know more about them)
Who's the Better/Your Favorite Para?
Finn Sinclair
Ash Sinclair-Parker
Voting ended onJan 29
Finn Sinclair
He/Him; Generation 1 and Gen-Z
Fun Fact: Finn played baseball in middle and high school! His number was 14 (because that's Troy's number from High School Musical), Finn sucked at it, and he only really kept going because it made his crush (Ronnie) really happy to go to games and watch him from the stands, and Finn is fundamentally incapable of saying no to Ronnie, even before they were dating. (He also does actually love the sport, but much more the watching it than the running and being around bros parts).
Ashe Sinclair-Parker / Asher Sinclair
They/He/She; Generation 2 and Gen Beta
Fun Fact: Ash has a soft spot for old fairytales, especially Little Red Riding Hood. She actually sewed a red cape that she wears every so often as a going-out coat, and thinks it's adorable that Jackson loves werewolf stuff, to complement. If Ash ever runs into anything that's a Grimm's retelling (or Grimm's like...), like Little Red, Hansel and Gretel, or the Three Little Pigs... it will most likely get Ash's attention.
Tiebreaker twenty-three!! As always, your options, should you choose: pick a random button, your favorite character, or read the roleplay below to help you. Thanks for playing!!
Who's the Better/Your Favorite Para?
Diego Hoffman-Reyes
Ash Sinclair-Parker
Voting ended onMay 2
Jay: Hello, hello, and welcome to another tiebreaker event!! Today is incredibly bittersweet because we have a moment that's impossible in my actual paracosm: a conversation between my beloved Asher Diego Sinclair and his late grandfather and namesake, Mr. Diego Hoffman.
Let's start like we always do, by centering ourselves on the family tree by yapping about an allocishet white man: Finn Sinclair. Mr. H, would you like to start?
Diego: My relationship to the boy? Officially, he is Stella's child, so Finn's the little boy who lives next door and plays with my daughters whenever he gets the chance. Unofficially... he's like a son to me. His mom works late at a diner—her ex left her before the kid was born, so she needs help keeping watch—so after school and on the weekends, Finn's usually over at my place, doing his homework and annoying my girls. I'm—well, there's my ex-wife's husband too—but I'm one of the only men in his life, so I've agreed with Stella to take some of that responsibility.
I love that kid. Finn's my little helper in the garage—I run a vintage auto mechanics shop—and whenever I get a surrender, he helps me fix it up (then I give his mom a good chunk of the sales for his college fund). I've taught the kid Spanish (because my girls kept using him as an excuse to speak English at home). And he pretends like I don't know about his crush on my daughter, Veronica. I love that kid like my own.
Jay: Awesome, thank you, Mr. H. Asher. What about you?
Ash: Finn's my dad!
Jay: And your mom?
Ash: I have two moms?
Jay: Well, yes. But your Mama mom.
Ash: Oh. Mama is Ronnie.
Jay: So your grandpa was right about your dad's crush on her?
Ash: Yeah? Duh?
Jay: Fair. Anything else you wanna say about your parents?
Ash: Not really. I love them. I'm lucky to have three. They let me keep myJackson. I'm chill.
Jay: I want to give the sentence "They let me keep myJackson" to the Asher that existed the day Finn brought Jax to stay with y'all so bad.
Ash: Yeah, well myJackson was a jerk.
Jay: I know, my love. Okay! Time to think of another question... ooh! This is a fun yet depressing one. So, in the canon, Mr. H, you pass away while Finn, Vanessa, and Ronnie are in high school. And Asher isn't born for like... almost fifteen years later.
So, Mr. H, Asher, if the two of you could go forward or back in time to have a conversation with each other, what would you want to say? For context, Asher also has two older sisters: Samantha and a half-sister named Cassidy.
Diego: Well, that... is a question... I think, first, I'd like to give my children peace and say that I've been there whenever they've needed me, in one way or another.
Jay: That's mostly Finn, and his Visiting Hours by Ed Sheeran-self. He's only in Michigan three times a year—moved to New York when his oldest daughter was born—but he tries to make time to sit with you and infodump about his kids whenever he can, which is at least once a year. And, you know, they all put your picture up in November for Day of the Dead, obviously. Vanessa—she writes to you in her journal, sometimes. And Veronica—I think a part of her will always be in denial. She's a look-forward, not-back type.
Diego: I think I have less to say—I was never the monologing type—and more to do. For my grandson—Does Vanessa have any children?
Jay: Yes? Two adopted sons: Max and Roman. They're twins; she met them when they were five.
Diego: Ah. So my grandsons—same things I did with Finn—fix up some cars with them, go to their baseball games—Do they play sports?
Jay: All of them do. Cassie plays baseball. Sam and Asher are soccer. Max is in ballet, and Roman is in gymnastics.
Diego: And for the girls, spoil them with toys, like I did with my own daughters. All the Barbies, and Poly Pockets, Webkins, and whatever the kids want these days.
Jay: Asher? What about you?
Ash: Hmm?
Jay: If you could time-travel, what'd you want to tell or do with Mr. H?
Ash: Um, I dunno. It's... weird, you know? Mama and Dad, and Aunt Nessa, and my Grandmas and Grandpa Rivera always talk about him. Like all the time. I've seen a hundred pictures and videos, and all that. So like... I dunno... there's not much I'd want to ask, necessarily? That I can't just figure out by, like... asking my parents?
I— the one thing that worries me... so, like, I'm named after him, right? My middle name is Diego. And, so, like, names mean something, and Mama and Daddy have told me that, like, they didn't just pull random names out of baby books. Like, our names mean something.
So like... I dunno, I guess I'm supposed to, like, live in Grandpa's legacy, or whatever that means. And... well, one, I'm trans. I'm genderfluid. Sometimes I'm a boy, but, like... even if I wasn't trans, I wanna play with Barbies too!! And, like... sometimes I feel like having his name puts so much Pressure on me being the man of the family, and all that, and I just—I'm Not, and I don't wanna be.
So like... I dunno... if I had to do stupid time travel and all that... would he even like me??? Would he be mad that Mama and Dad gave his name to a—
I tried to ask Aunt Nessa once, because, like... well she's gay. Obviously. Aunt Nessa and Aunt Ella. But like... she told me that she never came out to him, because, like, she didn't really know—Well, Auntie knew she liked girls since forever, but she didn't really know it was a Thing to like girls until she was a teenager. And then when she was ready, you know, he got sick really quickly after that. So she has the same questions. Like... would he like Aunt Ella, and all that.
I dunno. This is why I don't like to think about it. My parents are great—I mean, obviously, Mama Quinn is gay, and I think a ton of her partners have been nonbinary, too. And my Grandmas are pretty good about it. They try, at least, and haven't really said anything bad about me being a girl sometimes. And Grandpa Rivera—he... he's like William, I don't think he loves it, but he knows enough not to say anything to my phase. Because, like, my Dad will start a fight. And then they'll both have Mama Ronnie mad at them. But would Grandpa H be like that?
Jay: I don't know either, love. Which is why I'm cutting y'all off here...
So anyway! On that joyous note!! Please vote for either Asher or Diego, to finish off our Grand Finals, and I'll see you in the next one (which will very soon be the start of our Winner's Championship!!!!!) Thanks for reading!!
If you don't know who I am (or my paras are), that's okay! All the info you need to make a random decision is below the fold! Feel free to click button. (or, click a para's tag to know more about them)
Who's the Better/Your Favorite Para?
Alice Morrison
Lydia Salvatore-Rivera
Voting ended onNov 25, 2025
Alice Morrison
She/Her; Generation 1 and Millennial
Fun Fact: Alice is a huge science fiction and dystopian fan. In her rare free time, she's probably binging the newest book releases or having a Star Trek episode play while she's working.
Lydia Salvatore-Rivera
She/Her; Generation 2 and Gen Beta
Fun Fact: Lydia is a huge fan of Alice in Wonderland and will die for anything related to it (playing cards, rabbits, tea parties, cats, blonde girls, pocket watches, etc).
If you don't know who I am (or my paras are), that's okay! All the info you need to make a random decision is below the fold! Feel free to click button. (or, click a para's tag to know more about them)
Who's the Better/Your Favorite Para?
Oliver Hill
Liam Dawson
Voting ended onOct 9, 2025
Oliver Hill
He/Him; Generation 1 and Gen Z
Fun Fact: Oliver is a lighting director and Asher's boss at their off-Broadway theatre!
Liam Dawson
He/Him; Generation 0 and Millennial
Fun Fact: Liam is an A-list Hollywood actor who does a lot of Western/Cowboy films. He's also done some Horror and Romance, too!
If you don't know who I am (or my paras are), that's okay! All the info you need to make a random decision is below the fold! Feel free to click button. (or, click a para's tag to know more about them)
Who's the Better/Your Favorite Para?
Caleb Booth
Gracie Dawson
Voting ended onOct 9, 2025
Caleb Booth
He/Him; Generation 0 and Millennial
Fun Fact: Caleb is the type of person who lovesss a good fun sock. Definitely would have a subscription to the Awesome Sock Club.
Gracie Dawson / Gracie Patrick
She/Her; Generation 0 and Millennial
Fun Fact: Gracie is such a girl mom. She's the first person Luca (her daughter) comes to for friendship gossip, pop culture, or to talk crushes.
