#umbrella-posting

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oh my fucking god do you think the Hargreeves powers go off when they sneeze?

like Luther and Allison and Ben’s powers can’t exactly do that but imagine Diego throwing something only to sneeze and accidentally sending it into a sharp 90 degree turn from his intended target

or Klaus sneezing and accidentally levitating or making Ben corpreal for a second

or Five sneezing and teleporting halfway across the house

or Vanya sneezing and cracking all of the glass in the room

colds and flus would be absolute hell for them but I find this idea hilarious

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my favorite thing about that scene in s1 where klaus pretends to be five’s dad is that the walls are literally made of glass?? you mean to tell me that the desk person and those other doctors didn’t see or hear klaus fuckin punch five, or slam a snow globe into his face?? what were they doin??

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so Five got crushed under a shit ton of bricks, got up, fought against someone who had all of his sibling’s powers along with his own, watched all of his siblings get shot and die, almost died himself but managed to harness the energy to successfully time travel and save his siblings (which he told no one about, might I add) while literally bleeding out from multiple bullet wounds, and just walked away like nothing happened? damn.

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some reporter: Vanya Hargreeves, how has your life been since the release of your book?

vanya, fresh from the sixties and completely over everything: i’m sad and tired and gay and that’s all you need to know

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GUYS

@chaotictua and i were talking and i need y’all to imagine something real quick-

Klaus coming home one day with a gift for Five, and it’s this

and it’s all for shits and giggles but to everyone’s surprise, Five LOVES it

so Klaus goes out again and comes home with these bad boys

and now Five’s got the whole set. it’s a common occurrence for the siblings to see Five sitting, half asleep, at the kitchen table with a cup of coffee in hand and of course absolutely rocking this outfit

and maybe Claire comes over and she sees this and is absolutely delighted, and begs her mom to get a matching blanket and slippers

so now Claire and Five are twinning, and become practically inseparable during Claire’s visit

and then Claire finds out that Five’s never used a face mask, which leads to a “girl’s night” that’s really just the siblings plus Claire making homemade masks and smearing them on

and if Five falls asleep with his on, no one mentions it

idk i just love domestic Hargreeves, and Tiana’s just feeding that love with her awesome ideas

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wouldn’t it be funny if s3 isn’t The Umbrella Academy vs The Sparrow Academy but instead The Umbrella Academy racing against time to stabilize their existence (cause with the timeline change they technically shouldn’t exist) and the season ends with them all disappearing one by one until it’s just Five and his last words are a quiet “I’m sorry” cause he failed to save his siblings again before dissolving as well?

wouldn’t it be so funny?

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the greatest mystery in the Umbrella Academy is how Five keeps his socks up