Alright so i'm playing mass effect for the first time and i picked the Sole Survivor trail thing in character creator. I immediately loved Wrex when i found him he is my favorite and i always have him on my time, which is important for this. So i was doing a mission thing where a bunch of scientists are being killed and we find out that it's another member of our old squad from akuze.
And this scientist guy tries to tell us that he has no evidence that they'd released those thresher maws. But wrex is all like Shepard was there that's all the proof she needs' and i'm like fuck yeah wrex you tell em.
But then istart to think about the whole thing. And it is SOO messed up, like.. Shepard's whole team apparently died and they were the only survivor. Only for years later to find out, likely after having come to terms with the whole thing. That there was ANOTHER survivor and that other survivor was kept in a lab for YEARS after the incident.
Imagine how fucked up that is. like if your whole family and a friend died in a car accident and years later you learn it happened because your teachers wanted to see what would happen, and years pater you've managed to start building a new family and new friends and you find out one of your old friends is alive and you teachers hid him from the world, and youfind out the car accident wasn't really an accident.
Imagin how fucked UP that is.
Because this means what happened Akuze wasn't an incident. It was murder. And you only find out that's what it was years later. After telling yourself it wasn't your fault and no one could have predicted it and it was no one's fault. But it was someone's fault. And you and someone else are the only two alive dealin with the ramifications of what it did. And you can't even take comfort in the fact that the rest of the squad got peace in death. Or that at least you took the brunt. Because you didn't. And if you found out years later that ONE of them was alive after all this time. Do you think it'd make shepard wonder if there were others still alive too? Like a tug in the back of their brain that whispers in the dead of night. Do you think shepard now blames themself for not finding toombs at the battle afterwards? Do you think shepard blames themself for not looking closer at what happened?
Anyways now i really really want a good painful fanfic about Shepard going through it back on the normandy in the days after that assignment.
I'd kill for a good hurt comfort with a healthy dollop of PTSD and nightmares on the side about that. I want some survivors guilt and i want us to deal with the act that Akuze was Shepard's FIRST mission. And i want to see all the potential implications of what effect tht could have on shepard