One of the hardest programs to rewire in a human is this natural response to be angry. Way too many times eye've been too cowardly to confront (what eye judge as) hurtful behavior..often ignoring it til it started to bubble up on smaller and smaller things..created this lashing-out behavior in me that became hurtful...and so the cycle of anger continues. Til the day eye slipped out of it.
It's hard to catch the moment when you first Initially get angry, for that point is so subtle sometimes...it slips in like an invisible eel and by the time it's seen, well, it's swimming on something other than the Truth un which it came.
But it's getting easier to catch. Easier to look at without spiraling down with fury. It still happens, and with the practice of using meye voice, I've screwed up hard.. because eye believed that pure emotion was Truth til I said it in the realm of lashing-out yet again..realizing Eye'm just spewing and not solving.. But eye believed this was necessary.. if Eye'm going to muster up the courage not to ignore the hard things..theres times im going to get it wrong because eye dont have the practiced experience of just saying what i mean the first time.. but it gets easier.
You know the anger response is deeply engrained as one of your first learned coping skills when you catch yourself becoming angry just because someone believes a certain way...the point of living as an individual here on earth with the gift/curse of free will IS to experience and create ideas unique to us so we can expand this consciousness field..
I suppose the oxymoron of the day is
Being angry because you're lonely...
That's alot of being angry at the distance Youve created..alot of being angry at Self.
Let me tell you...forcing a smile for 60 seconds triggers my brain out of the rage spiral. Breathing deeply can work. Walking away for a moment..putting your barefeet in the earth and focusing on your toes. These are all tools that can work.
There's too much hate in the world. There's too much anger towards ourselves.
Eye pledge to use one of these tools when I feel angry, and will continue to improve my toolbox. Who's with me? What's in your toolbox?
Stories welcome. These are the days Eye feel Human.
