Shane stood over the storm drain at the plant that had brought them into the sewers just days - weeks? - earlier. It had to have been a couple of weeks now, but the days all blurred together. He was too tired to try to separate the memories. War, grief - it had all finally caught up to him.
“Down on the ground! Drop your weapons and get down on the ground!”
“This is it?” Malone asked Shane. “A fucking waste plant?”
“It’s likely the only entrance into the sewers where you won’t be seen,” Shane said. “They can lead you the rest of the way to the crossroads.”
“What’s your plan, kid?”
They let their weapons drop as they got to their knees, placing their hands behind their heads… The armed men were in front of them, looking down on their captives… The man smiled wickedly. “Our orders are to bring you back… dead.”
“Well, I suppose when you don’t make it out alive, I’ll go back and tell everyone you fought bravely until the very end.”
Malone’s lips curled into a smile as he held his gaze on Shane. “Lemme tell you somethin’ about war; no one fights bravely. It’s fear that drives a man into battle. It’s fear that drives a man to fight, not because it’s something he believes in, but because he simply wants to survive.” Malone’s smile faded. “You know how I know this? Because I’ve seen death in war. I’ve seen grown ass men crying out to their mothers like children, begging for the comfort of their mother’s arms, begging to be reassured, that everything is going to be okay. I’ve see them take their last breath with fear in their eyes. None of them are at peace. They die only knowing fear. No one is brave, Shane. We’re all cowards. We’re all running from something; running for our lives. Fear is our bodies being rational, being sane, telling us to get the hell out of a bad situation. Fear is normal. Fear is real. Bravery is not. Bravery is a lie - a lie we tell to mask the reality of a situation in an attempt to comfort and reassure those around us.”
“Why are you telling me this?” Shane muttered.
“Because I can see through you, Shane. I see through the wall you put up around yourself. And sooner or later, that wall is going to come crashing down around you, and you won’t know what to do about it. You’re a coward just like I am, Shane. The problem is that you won’t admit it.”
Shane’s brows knit together. “I could argue that it takes a brave man to admit his fear.”
Malone smiled. “Only a stupid man would admit his fear. That’s the thing about fear; all the men I’ve watched die - they were damn scared, but they never admitted it. They carried that fear with them until they died.”
“I’d say that makes for a brave man,” Shane said.
Malone nodded as he seemed to consider this. “Maybe, maybe.” He adjusted the gun on his hip. His eyes moved to the grip of Shane’s gun, poking just slightly out of his back pocket, and he smiled. “So, what’s your plan?”
Shane clutched at his stomach where the bullet entered. He stared, mouth gaping, and the blood that covered his hands. He fell to his knees, gasping, as the world began to spin and fade in and out. Shane squeezed his eyes shut as the pain seared through him like fire. Najia held his hand as he drifted in and out of consciousness.“Don’t go,” Najia sobbed. “Hang on, Shane.”
Shane looked around the sewage plant considering Malone’s words. He certainly didn’t have a plan. Not now, not when it was all over with. He figured he’d just live in the valley forever until he died. But a part of him knew he was already dead. With each passing day since the invasion, he was dying. There was no life left in him. No will to live any longer. It had all gotten to be too much.
“Hang on, Shane.”
It was obvious to Shane; Malone was only trying to manipulate him to get him to help them in the sewers. He didn’t know what Malone’s endgame was, but he was sure that Malone was just trying to win him over for one last fight.
Shane watched as Malone moved towards the entrance to the sewers. He barked orders at his men and one by one, they descended. Malone was the last to climb the ladder down into the sewer. He met Shane’s gaze and saluted him casually just as he disappeared under ground. Shane stared at the storm drain for a moment and sighed. Life was simple, meaningful, when he had a goal: to find Jas, to get to the coast, to find Stardew Valley, to save Najia.
“I realized I really had nothing to live for, and wandering around the world aimlessly really wasn’t going to accomplish anything.” He paused. “I guess I wasn’t ready to give up, and the valley felt like another goal to work towards. Plus, I figured I’d find you there. And that didn’t seem so bad.”
Najia grew quiet. “And what if we don’t find anything?”
“Like you said; we’ll find something else to get to.” He smiled to her. “I heard the Fern Islands are great this time of year.”
“You know,” Najia said, returning his smile, “I’ve never been.”
Shane pulled the gun out of his pocket and moved towards the storm drain. He peered down into the darkness as the glow of their flashlights faded. He climbed down the ladder and his feet splashed in the puddle at the bottom as he skipped the last couple of rungs. He trotted down the tunnel until he caught up to Malone and the rest of their group.
“So, you’ve got a plan, I take it?” Malone said, but did not turn to him.
“I’ve got a little girl back home,” Shane said. “And I can’t trust you not to fuck up this world for her.”
