#v silly

[tikiki05]

thanks to caitvi shippers, anytime i see the term “sesbian lex” i wanna put a gun to my mouth

[subspaceemo]

I'm at my first guy's night sleepover and it's so much fun. We've been watching stupid movies and eating all sorts of snacks, being gross, talking about nothing. It's time for bed and we all start stripping down to our boxers and I feel eyes on me as I reveal my hairy tummy and thighs. I look around, "what?" they look between each other and then one says, "well, I'll say it then. We want to see your cock." the other quickly adds, "we've all seen each other's dicks." the third continues, "and we'll show you ours." They look at me so hopefully and I shrug, "alright." I sit back on the sofa, shift my boxers over my hips and pull my lips open, revealing my cock, just normal, not hard. They make a series of depraved noises, "fuckin hell, man, looks so good," one says, stooping to look closer. "do you want to jerk off?" the other asks. "cause we like to jerk off before bed," the third adds. I look at them dubiously as they start pulling they're cocks out and stroking, hardening up quickly while I watch. I feel myself getting wet, growing hard, my hand dips between my thighs and begins playing with my hard dick as I look between their increasingly flustered faces. "Oh fuck, who are we cumming on today?" one groans, their stomach clenching with the effort, they all look at me, "Do you want it? Wherever you like?" I moan and rub faster, "face, chest, stomach." I offer and they all circle me, stroking faster and faster, the slick sounds of skin palming skin making me groan. The first one splatters me in cum, it lands on my chest, my neck, my mouth, I taste the salty desire and lick it into my mouth. "fuck dude, fuck yeah." They groan. Fuck, I'm getting so close. Another one tilts my head back at they cum on my face, slow pulses leaking over my lips and making me whine as they rub the tip against my cheek, milk every last drop onto my face. They taste so good. "the noises your cunt makes are too much, man, I'm not usually this fast." the third groans as ribbons of thick, heavy, hot cum decorate my stomach, my chest. I pant and moan at they watch me tip myself over the edge, cumming hard enough to yell. One takes my hand and uses it to spread my wetness through their cooling cum, "now we're bonded in spunk," they say sincerely, "so we won't accidentally fuck each other in the night." They pull up their boxers and start settling in for the night, "was that a problem you were having before?" I laugh as I pull up my boxers and lie down. "it's just good to take precautions." another says solemnly.

[slutty-little-katgirl]

get yourself a group of people you can be deranged with. or multiple, for different kinds of deranged

[berrysong]

Thinking about this

[zillyhooveseternal]

what if we were both gods in a universe which we created and i made porn plushies in our image (we are dating)

[boo-gutzz]

I love Mumbo dearly but I was rly dragging my heels getting through his season 8 unfortunately but with Zedaph so far I've made it through the entirety of his season 5, 8 and I'm working on watching 9 and 10 rn too lmao I'm getting there yall!!

[shinakazami1]

whats TSP / TBG? (im polish but dont live in poland)

Yooo hello another Polish fella :] I tbh thought the poll would only go around fandom so let me quickly introduce you to the games!!

TSP stands for The Stanley Parable. It's a first-person view game where you play as a silent protagonist, Stanley (but also, you are not him) in quite unusual office that bends time and space hehe.

You are told by the Narrator what to do but you are constantly given a chance to explore another choice, making the Narrator react. It's a comedy+psychological horror title and I do recommend checking it out, especially the Ultra Deluxe edition since it added an additional half to the game :]

TBG is The Beginner's Guide. Made by one of the original creators of TSP, Davey Wreden, it's another first-person with a narrator but the setting is totally different. It starts with Davey the narrator telling you he is showing you Coda, his bud's games.

It's a title that is worth exploring with little to no spoilers, especially since it's around an hour long!

Both games are available on Steam. I recommend them for people who like meta games talking about games, good writing and voice acting and just ideas that will keep you wondering for days.

Toodle-pip!

[virtue-and-beneviolence]

How I Met My Gangster

In which you find out your date, Hanma Shuji, is a yakuza in the middle of a McDonalds at 12:30 am.

Only warning is that this is unedited crack; wc: 750

You were probably an idiot for agreeing to a date from the tall man that offered you his jacket, helmet, and a ride home after you missed the last bus. You were probably an idiot to have taken him up on his ride in the first place. Standing (well, hunching) several inches taller than you and hands branded “sin” and “punishment,” it was no shock that this man could have overpowered you in a second, had he wanted to. Contrary to his first impression, he was so wholly disarming in his black jeans and henley, playful smile dancing across his features. He was such a goofy guy. He felt warm. He was more than a little magnetic. When he dropped you off at your building, he wrote his name and number on your hand like a flirtatious teenager.

Hanma Shuji.

That’s how you ended up on the back of his bike for the second time this week, headed to McDonalds for a midnight snack. You two placed an order that would put some stoned teenagers to shame and at the last second Shuji added, “An M&M McFlurry, for the lady,” and handed the cashier his black card. Wait. A black card?

The cashier hesitated. Your jaw dropped. Shuji was unbothered and held out the card a little further.

“Sir…?”

“Maybe you’re new…but this is the part where you take my card and slide it.” Shuji nodded to the cashier and subtly waved the card as if it meant nothing.

“Sir I…uh…can’t swipe that, i-it’s fake.” the cashier stuttered.

“The fuck it is!” Shuji said in exasperated disbelief. “Look I just want my Mc-fuckin-nuggets, can you just let me pay?”

“Can I see some ID, please?”

“Uh…” He pulled out his wallet and showed his license, “there, I made sure the names matched when my buddy printed it.” The cashier paused. You may have only known Shuji for a handful of hours collectively, but you laughed at his joke, “See? She knows it was a joke.”

“I have to get my manager.”

Shuji sighed and turned to you, “This never usually happens.” His cheeks were tinged ever so slightly pink either from embarrassment or frustration. You wouldn’t have noticed in the dingy lighting of the restaurant if it weren’t for the contrast of his signature white Henley. Your lips split into a smile, how many of that exact shirt did he have? Here you were on a date with what you thought was just some cute, edgy part timer or something. For fuck’s sake, he dressed in a shirt he probably got on sale 3 for 10 at Uniqlo, sweats, and slides. Where the hell did he get a black card? “This is so awkward, y/n I-“

You giggled at the absurdity of it all and cut in, “How do you even have one of those Hanma?”

“They offered it to me, and I took it? How does anyone end up with any credit card?”

“Yeah, but-“

“Sir, do you have an alternate form of payment?”

Shuji huffed and pulled out his wallet. He pulled out a 5,000 yen bill and handed it over, “I only carry 5,000 yen bills, is that acceptable?” He sighed the words. They took the bill and inspected it. Hanma leaned in, “Don’t worry, counterfeit isn’t my crime.” He turned back to you and winked.

Just what had you gotten into?

And why was it like kinda cute how he did that?

“You order will be ready soon, thanks for your patience.”

You thanked then and tugged Hanma away out of earshot. “So, what do you do again?”

“Ever heard of Toman?”

You couldn’t help it, you’re eyes went wide. You had caught the eye of an executive of Tokyo’s most notorious and dangerous gangs. “I thought those guys were nocturnal and, like, slept in Armani suits?!” You whisper-shouted at him in amused shock.

He shrugged, “Not really my style. I’ve got a couple for exec meetings if you wanna see that so badly.” He wiggled his eyebrows at you. You laughed, trying to stay calm. How was this guy, so chill and relaxed, a yakuza? Your order number was called and you nudged his arm with your shoulder as you walked past him to collect your food.

“For a gangster you’re really a down to earth guy, you know that?”

“You won’t say that when you see my penthouse.” He said with the cheesiest lilt.

“Now you’re just bragging, shut up and eat your Mc-fuckin’-nuggets, Han-”

“Shuji.”

“-Shuji.”

I'm throwin in @bajifuyutorabb bc you got the first bit when i started lol

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