❝ She was strong and stubborn but loving. She was an untouchable angel with a devil's mark. She was beautiful. ❞ ➤ listen.
i. once upon a december - russian version
ii. human - christina perri ( i can dance and play the part if that's what you ask. )
iii. soap - melanie martinez ( i think i left the faucet running, now my words are filling up the tub. )
iv. northern lights - jaymes young ( maybe she suffers for the thrill of it all. )
v. blinding - florence + the machine ( no more dreaming like a girl so in love with the wrong world. )
vi. wild horses - birdy ( i will move on and you should know i mean it. )
vii. you found me - the fray ( lost and insecure, you found me. )
viii. skyscraper - demi lovato ( all my windows still are broken, but i'm standing on my feet. )
ix. miss jackson - panic!at the disco ( face like heaven catching lighting in your nightgown. )
x. blank space - taylor swift ( darling, i'm a nightmare dressed like a daydream. )
xi. no angels - bastille ft. ella eyre ( scrub is a guy that can't get no love from me. )
xii. worth it - fifth harmony ( show me what you got cause i don't wanna waste my time. )
xiii. i lived - one republic ( with every broken bone, i swear, i lived. )
xiv. alive - sia ( you took it out, but i'm still breathing. )
― hara holds a habit in twisting and denying reality; manipulating memories to make all of them seem pleasant. despite her urge in wanting to believe in all the good, in all tales being real, along with her dreams; not everything is all that she seems. at times it crumbles down; through tainted faith and failed wishes which takes quite a toll on her.
ghosts in the photograph never lied to me; i'd be all of that, i'd be all of that. a false memory would be everything; a denial, my eliminent. what was that for? what was that for? what would you do if you saw spaceships over glasgow? would you fear them? every aircraft, every camera is a wish that wasn't granted; what was that for? what was that for? try to be bad. try to be bad
002. DREAM, PRISCILLA AHN
― then and now; a comparison between the person she was when she was younger (when things were much simpler and easier) to the person she has grown up to be. an assurance that everything will be okay and that the future, no matter how scary, she’ll be able to fight through -- come what may.
i was a little girl, alone in my little world; who dreamed of a little home for me. i played pretend between the trees and fed my house guests bark and leaves and laughed in my pretty bed of green. i had a dream; that I could fly from the highest swing. i had a dream.
003. I REMEMBER HER, INGRID MICHAELSON
― in regards to both her deceased biological parents. her frequent meetings with them in her dreams are what keeps the memories fresh to her. a constant reminder that they do exist and that they are looking over her.
there’s a house, that’s not on a hill and the paint’s chipping off of the old window sill. there’s a tree in the front yard that’s older than me and older than all of you. (...) she would kiss my hand, she would kiss my head; then she’d fall asleep with me in my tiny bed. she would sing me lullabies, gave me my hazel eyes and then she’d call me beautiful. she made me beautiful. i remember her, i remember her, i remember her so well (...) but things they fade, things turn to grey. as much as I try to save them, they turn grey. just like the house, that’s not on a hill, with all of the rust on the gate, the chips on the sill; but I love it still
004. CALENDAR GIRL, STARS
― when it all gets a bit too much for hara, she often would keep to herself and shut down in her apartment on her own. a struggle with the fight going on with her; as she tries to face reality but finds herself scared of what it might do if she accepts it. eventually, she heals with the small bit of hope left inside her.
if i am lost for a day; try to find me. but if I don't come back, then I won't look behind me. all of the things that I thought were so easy; just got harder and harder each day. december is darkest and june is the light but this empty bedroom won't make anything right. while out on the landing a friend i forgot to send home, who waits up for me all through the night. calendar girl who's in love with the world; stay alive.
005. ALIVE, GABRIELLE APLIN
― a song of recovery and hara healing eventually from her fall. keeping and growing more hope inside of her; knowing that she’s lucky to be here.
just one step, a different day; would I know you at all? would I know you at all? when your kingdom falls and your family fade; but it wasn't your fault. it was never your fault. and I realize you have to feel alive. all your worries will escape through the door and you'll wake up all alone on the floor; it's not too late. just rely on me now.
006. WHOLE LOT OF HEART, INGRID MICHAELSON
― hara has days where she doesn’t like who she is; due to past experiences where she had been bullied for the way she is and for how her family is. despite the pain and at time losing herself to please others, there are parts that she would never exchange.
you said there's something ‘bout the moon; it rose too soon. are we doing what we should? you said it's life that moves too much; we're losing touch but I'm not losing you. there's a whole lot of heart in me; i feel it under my skin and I know and I know and I know; there's a whole lot of heart in me. it's takes a whole lot of heart to see; everything's coming down roses; and I know and I know and I know; there's a whole lot of heart in me.
007. BE STILL, THE KILLERS
― her fathers’ words to her; on keeping her innocence, and not letting anything break her character no matter how rough life can get. they known and understood the difficulties she had faced growing up; the trouble in connecting with people, and reality. they worry to say the least; how her compassionate and innocence might welcome people to take advantage of her. however, it doesn’t stop them from telling hara to stay the way she is.
be still, and go on to bed. nobody knows what lies ahead, and life is short to say the least; we're in the belly of the beast. be still, wild and young. long may your innocence reign; like shells on the shore, and may your limits be unknown, and may your efforts be your own; if you ever feel you can't take it anymore. don't break character; you've got a lot of heart. is this real or just a dream? rise up like the sun, labor till the work is done.
008. PROVIDENCE, LISA MITCHELL
― her bravery and optimism in facing and viewing the world through her eyes; mostly the good and believing the good.
we're young! we're old! we look we climb the trees, we can't tell them from we. it's hard, i know; we search, we wait. oh world! oh world! oh universe! we're here, we're ready! what do you want? i speak to you most everyday, i smell the roses i am brace; oh world, oh world, oh universe! i'm here.
009. NEOPOLITAN DREAMS, LISA MITCHELL
― the world through hara’s eyes. she drifts off, being lost in her own world; ignoring reality the way it is and blocking it from raining on her parade.
you go on i'll be okay, i can dream the rest away. it's just a little touch of fate; it'll be okay. it sure takes its precious time, but it's got right and so have i. i turn my head up to the sky, i focus one thought at a time; i do not let the little thieves under my tightly buttoned sleeves. you couldn't be a longer time, i feel like i am walking blind, i have nowhere i'll have time (...) i like the way that you talk, i like the way that you walk; it's hard to recreate such an individual gate. you wait your turn in the queue, you say your sorries and thank you's; i don't think you're ever a hundred percent in the room.
010. ALL ABOUT YOUR HEART, MINDY GIEDHILL
― hara’s personality and her view on unconditional love; about accepting someone’s past no matter if it’s bad or good. this song applies to her relationship with her best friend jack wyndham.
i don't mind your odd behavior, it's the very thing i savor. if you were an ice cream flavor, you would be my favorite one. my imagination sees you like a painting by van gogh; starry nights and bright sunflowers; follow you where you may go. (...) you're a butterfly held captive; small and safe in your cocoon. go on you can take your time, time is said to heal all wounds. oh, i've loved you from the start, in every single way and more each passing day. you are brighter than the stars. believe me when i say, it's not about your scars; it's all about your heart
011. COIN LAUNDRY, LISA MITCHELL
― hara’s innocent and naive thoughts about love. she often romanticizes scenarios; on meeting the right person.
there i was sitting on the top of the world in a coin laundry. well i could have been royalty, sitting in the palace like a queen. do you have a dollar? do you have a dollar for me? have you got a house on a hill and a bed for three? do you have a story. do you have a story for me? do you know the one where we'll all live happily?
