If Melma and Velma ever met.
Melma: Who the hell are you?
Velma: Jinkies! I was about to ask the same thing.
Melma: I'm Velma Dinkley
Velma: No. I'm Velma Dinkley
Melma: Fine! What mysteries did you solve, "Velma"
Velma: Black Knight Ghost, Miner49er, Captain Cutler, Pterodactyl Ghost, more recently Crybaby Clown, oh yeah and we stopped the evil entity from taking over the world. What mysteries did you solve?
Melma: Th mystery of my missing mom and the serial killer.
Velma: Okay....tell me more.
Melma: My mom went missing after I found my presents so she went to get ones I won't be disappointed in. But then she went missing and every time I got a clue, I would hallucinate. Anyway, so I was later framed by the killer and after I started digging, I found out that it was Fred who killed Brenda. He was of course innocent but it doesn't matter cause he's a rich white dude with a tiny dong. So after some more shenanigans, I learned about Doctor Perdue and her brain swapping experiment, Scoobi which...
Velma: Where's Scooby Doo
Melma: Oh he's not here. Forget about that, just focus on the mystery.
Velma: Okay...
Melma: Which was to swap brains with an enemy and have them infiltrate the enemy. But she went insane and put in an asylum....or so we thought! Because it's reveled that Victoria Jones was the killer all along!
Velma: What? That's random and makes no sense.
Melma: It turns out that Dr. Perdue was successful but her dad General Meeting took all the glory. So she stopped her work and for that she was put in an asylum to talk but she won't. So Victoria, after seeing her dad leave, rebuilt the business and seeing her useless son Fred and not wanting him to destroy what she built, she decided to swap his brain with a girl. When she found my mom digging around, she hypnotized her to do her work, and hypnotized me to have these hallucinations.
Velma: What happened to Victoria Jones?
Melma: Well we escaped of course and as she was about to shoot us, Norville...
Velma: Norville? Not Shaggy?
Melma: He's a simp for me. So he comes in and ricochets the bullet, hitting a stalactite and killing her. I get a day named after me, all of my friends all hate me and I kicked out my dad and his bitch Sophie along with their daughter Amanda. I live happily with me mom and that's the end till season 2.
Velma: Wow, I pity you.
Melma: I know.
Velma: No like I pity you because that was lame.
Melma: Wait what.
Velma: You sure that Sophie is the bitch? Cause you to me you are!
Melma: Wha-
Velma: Dr. Perdue could have been the killer! She could have like gone insane and General Meeting, realizing she's messed up, puts her in an asylum but by then she had already swapped her brain with Victoria. She marries Fred's dad, haves Fred and secretly builds a machine, called Scooby, to switch consciousnesses around the world. When your mom comes snooping around, she switches brains with her. So when she's found by you, she manipulates you into not trusting your friends. Then she put her plan in motion and you guys make up. Norville has a mom right?
Melma: Yeah but-
Velma: Norville's mom could have been secretly helping her, being a serial killer double. Maybe his dad too. Anyway, you guys fight her off and your mom sacrifices herself. The day is saved and in the end credits it can be reveled that the resulting explosion hit a stray dog that was taken in by Norville and it gains the ability to talk! That would be awesome but I guess no one thought of that. Now if you excuse me, I have a date with a mystery. See ya!
*goes into the Mystery Machine and it drives off, splashing Melma with mud*
Melma: That honestly sounds cooler *stares off into the distance*
