Hell’s Front Porch
Synopsis: The AC’s broken inside V Tower and everyone is suffering…aside from Y/N.
TW: slightly suggestive content (Val and me wanting to suck Vox’s nice titties, Val being Val), alcohol (briefly)
A/N: Next TV, Sharks & Moths update is angst!! But with our shitty tv man<3 just a heads up it’s awful…can’t let yall get too comfortable with fluff🙄
TV, Sharks & Moths Masterlist
Main Masterlist
Hell didn’t do seasons the way it did on Earth.
The winter season could only be described as a little chilly, enough for someone to pull out a thin blanket or a cardigan. As for its summers, it didn’t just slowly transition with temperatures that gradually climbed. One day it would be awful, but overall manageable, then the next day it was overwhelming.
The air itself felt thick, like breathing through syrup. The heat didn’t just sit on your skin—it pressed, seeped into bone and clung to lungs. The sky, already an angry crimson, seemed to burn brighter this time of year, casting everything in a suffocating, feverish glow that never dimmed.
And worst of all?
There was no escape.
Not even in V Tower.
Which was saying something because V Tower was state-of-the-art. Vox had built it that way with cutting edge technology, flawless systems, and with temperature regulation designed to keep everything crisp, controlled and perfect. He couldn’t have his baby overheating in his tank.
“Unbelievable.” Vox began, his hand stretched up to the ceiling at one of the vents. It wheezed out a stream of cool air that could only be described as lukewarm. “You spend over a grand on an AC unit and this is where it gets you.”
Slowly, Vox’s wires that were holding him up retracted and he landed softly on the floor beneath him.
“And you know, when I found out that it was going to be another fucking heatwave, I called the AC company and they told me the system could keep up with it.” Vox scoffed, “what a fucking joke. Why don’t you tell that bullshit to someone else? I fucking know about weather patterns and shit. Don’t tell me what I—are you evening listening to me, Val?”
As Vox turned to face his partner, he found Valentino draped dramatically over Vox’s couch wearing practically no clothes. His wings hung off the side of the couch, one arm thrown over his face to add to his dramatic appearance.
“Babe, I’m not gonna lie,” Valentino said, “I stopped listening hours ago.” He then slowly removed his arm and looked at Vox, “do you know how sticky I am? It’s really fucking gross. Besides, do you know what it’s doing to the fur on my wings?”
“Oh, I’m sorry, is the renowned porn director slightly inconvenienced?” Vox shot back, gesturing wildly at the vent again. “My entire infrastructure is at risk here, Valentino. Do you know what heat does to circuitry? To internal wiring? To precision engineered perfection?”
Valentino blinked at him slowly, unimpressed. “All I’m hearing is that we’re both suffering,” he said flatly. “Just in different, equally tragic ways.”
Vox groaned, dragging a hand down his screen. “This is exactly why I don’t rely on outside services,” he muttered. “I build things myself and they work. I outsource one thing—one—and suddenly I’m living in a goddamn sauna.”
Valentino hummed as he watched Vox pace like it was mildly entertaining. “You should take it as a sign.”
“A sign of what?” Vox snapped.
“That you should be shirtless too,” Valentino replied smoothly, a lazy grin tugging at his lips. “Level the playing field.”
Vox stopped dead in his tracks. “Absolutely not.”
“Oh, come on, papi.” Valentino purred, getting up from the couch with a sticky sound to follow. “I know you’ve gotta be dying under all that.” He said, stepping in front of Vox and bending at the waist to reach his height.
“Just think about it,” he said, trailing his finger up from his stomach and then to his bow tie before grabbing it and untying it. “Once you’re out of this thing, you can actually breathe and your body won’t be having an internal meltdown.”
As the bow tie came undone, Valentino dropped it on the floor, using his lower hands to gently move up Vox’s sweater vest. “Then, once you’re out of this fucking cage, I can suck those beautiful tits of—.”
“Jesus Christ, Valentino. It’s a million fucking degrees out and you’re still horny?”
Valentino and Vox looked to find Velvette by the entrance, her phone in hand with an irritated look on her face.
“V-Velvette!” Vox greeted, pushing Valentino away from him. “What can I—?”
“I was hoping you could tell me why the air conditioning isn’t fucking working,” Velvette said. “Do you have any idea what my models are going through right now?” She asked, walking over to the two, “what I’m going through?”
“I’m aware of the problem, my dear.” Vox said.
“And what are we doing about it?” Velvette snapped, “I’m hot and I don’t like it! You would think you would have installed fucking back ups or some shit.” She shrugged, “I don’t know…fans or some shit.”
“Fans?” Vox repeated, almost like he was offended. “Velvette, I did not build a technological empire just to downgrade to plastic.”
“Well your ‘technological empire’ is sweating its ass off right now,” she shot back. “So unless you’ve got a miracle fix hiding somewhere in that big brain of yours, I suggest you start thinking.”
Vox summoned a holographic screen that displayed Hell's weather forecast for the next week. “It’s not the system itself,” he muttered. “The external temperature is overwhelming the intake regulation. The cooling units are functioning exactly as designed, they just weren’t designed for when Hell decides to become the surface of the sun overnight.”
“So we’re fucked,” Valentino says.
“We’re not ‘fucked,’” Vox replies. “It’s just a temporary inconvenience.”
Then, the door opened again and Y/N stepped inside, a slight tan to her skin. “Why do you all look like you’re all suffering?”
“Where the hell have you been?” Vox snapped, “I figured you would have been the first one to complain.”
Y/N tilted her head. “About what?”
“The heat.”
“Oh, that!” Y/N exclaimed, nodding in agreement. “Yeah, I’ve been at my territory all day.”
Silence fell over the room but Velvette was the first to say something.
“You went to the beach without us?!”
“Y-Yeah—?”
“Why didn’t you invite me?!” Velvette asked.
“Well, I was gonna invite you all,” Y/N said. “But I know you all have jobs and—.”
“I’m going to the beach.” Velvette said, “Val, you coming?”
“Yeah.” Valentino agreed, “I can’t take this anymore.”
“You wanna come too, Vox?” Y/N curiously asked.
Vox seemed to hesitate for a moment. “I suppose I could.”
“Yay!” Y/N cheered, “beach day!”
•••
The coastal side of the Pentagram—also known as Y/N’s territory—was always packed during the summertime.
Vox had noticed the first few months of managing Y/N’s territory how the sales seemed to go up, and when he checked his security cameras, the beach was packed with sinners looking to get away from the summer heat. So, of course, he capitalized on it.
“V, there’s no fucking way you’re making people pay for a spot on the beach,” Velvette said as she looked at the sign just on the boardwalk.
Vox didn’t look ashamed in the slightest. “It’s called monetizing something that’s in high demand, my dear. Besides, we don’t have to pay so there’s no problem.”
“It’s sand, Vox.”
Y/N shrugged, “I don’t really care what he does.” She assured Velvette, “as long as everyone has fun.”
Y/N didn’t notice it at first. She stepped off the last wooden stair and onto the warm sand with a soft little gasp, like she’d just walked into something magical instead of something she technically owned.
Her feet sank slightly with each step, the grains hot but not unbearable, and the distant crash of dark, inky waves against the shore filled the air with a steady, soothing rhythm.
“See?” Y/N said brightly, turning halfway toward them as her hair shifted in the ocean breeze. “It’s soooo nice out here!”
Behind her, the contrast was noticeable.
What had been a loud, overcrowded beach only seconds ago was now eerily quiet. Towels abandoned. Drinks left half finished. A pair of flip flops sitting awkwardly near the shoreline with no owner in sight.
Sinners had scattered because four Overlords had just walked onto the sand like they owned the place.
Which, technically, one of them did.
Velvette glanced around, unimpressed. “Well, that’s one way to get privacy.”
Vox adjusted his button up slightly, scanning the now cleared stretch of beach with thinly veiled satisfaction.
“Efficient,” he hummed. “Didn’t even need to enforce anything.”
Y/N blinked, finally slowing her steps as she looked around. “Oh.” A pause. “Did everyone leave?”
Velvette snorted. “What gave it away?”
“I thought it was just…less crowded over here,” Y/N admitted, glancing back toward the boardwalk as if the sinners might magically reappear if she looked hard enough.
“They’ll be back,” Vox said dismissively. “Give it ten minutes. Greed always outweighs fear eventually.”
“That’s comforting,” Velvette muttered.
Y/N seemed to accept that explanation easily enough, her attention already drifting back to the water. Her expression lit up again, any lingering concern dissolving almost instantly.
“Ooh! We should set up over there!” She said, pointing toward a spot closer to the shoreline where the waves lapped gently against the sand.
Before anyone could argue, she was already heading that way.
Valentino chuckled under his breath, watching her go. “She doesn’t think very hard, does she?”
Velvette crossed her arms, following after Y/N at a much slower pace. “No. But that’s why we like her.”
Vox lingered for a moment longer, eyes flickering briefly toward the boardwalk where a few sinners were already peeking out, cautiously watching.
He smirked.
Then he turned and followed.
By the time they reached Y/N’s chosen spot, she was already spinning in a slow circle like she was trying to take everything in all at once.
Y/N shielded her eyes slightly as she looked out over the water. “We should totally stay here all day.”
“We are not staying all day,” Vox said immediately. “I have work—.”
Valentino dropped a hand onto Vox’s shoulder as he passed him, leaning in just enough to murmur, “You said that about the last thing we did together too.”
“That was different.”
“It really isn’t.”
Velvette dumped her bag unceremoniously onto the sand. “Can you two flirt later and help set up before I melt?”
Y/N perked up. “Oh! Right, umbrellas!”
She bent down to grab one of the folded umbrellas from their things, immediately struggling with how to unfolded.
Vox sighed, already stepping forward. “Give me that before you break it.”
“I’m not gonna break it,” Y/N protested, though she let him take it anyway.
“You say that like it means something.”
Valentino settled into one of the chairs that hadn’t even been set up properly yet, watching with a lazy grin as Vox began wrestling with the umbrella.
“Careful, cariño,” he called out, voice dripping with amusement. “Wouldn’t want you to lose the fight to beach equipment.”
Vox shot him a look. “It’s poorly designed.”
Velvette pulled out her phone, already recording. “Oh, this is going online.”
“You post anything and I’m deleting your account.”
“You say that like you haven’t tried before.”
Meanwhile, Y/N hovered nearby, offering extremely unhelpful suggestions.
“Maybe twist it the other way?”
“I am twisting it the other way.”
“Oh. What if you hit it?”
“I’m not hitting it.”
“Sometimes hitting things works.”
Vox paused. Then, he hit it.
The umbrella snapped open instantly with a loud whoomp, nearly knocking him backwards as the fabric stretched taut above them.
There was a brief silence before Velvette burst out laughing.
Valentino clapped slowly from his seat. “Incredible technique.”
Y/N beamed. “See? I helped!”
Vox stared up at the now perfectly functional umbrella, then back down at all of them.
“I hate all of you.”
“Yeah, yeah,” Velvette said, still laughing as she moved to drag one of the chairs properly into the shade. “Hurry up and sit down before you overheat, tech boy.”
Vox took a seat, crossing his arms over his chest like a pouty child while Y/N stripped off the shirt and shorts she was wearing, only to reveal a dark brown bathing suit with bright blue flowers on it.
“You can’t wear that—!” Vox exclaimed, almost jumping out of his seat, but Velvette had pushed him back down into it.
“This is the beach, dumbass.” Velvette said, “stop being so protective of her. Who the hell is gonna try anything?” She then snapped a picture of Y/N, complimenting how hot she was.
“That is not beach appropriate,” Vox said flatly.
Y/N blinked at him, glancing down at herself like she hadn’t even thought twice about it. “What? It’s just a swimsuit.”
“It’s barely a swimsuit,” Vox shot back. “There’s more missing than there is actual fabric.”
Valentino let out a low laugh from his chair. “Oh, relax. She looks gorgeous.”
Velvette didn’t even look up from her phone. “Correction: she looks insanely hot.”
Y/N perked up immediately at that, smiling. “You think so?”
“Obviously,” Velvette said, snapping another picture. “Turn a little—yeah, like that. Perfect.”
Vox made an irritated noise, leaning forward with his elbows on his knees. “You two are not helping.”
Valentino tilted his head, smirking. “Helping what, exactly?”
Vox gestured vaguely toward Y/N like that explained everything. “That.”
Y/N followed the motion, then looked back at him, confused but still smiling. “What’s wrong with ‘that’?”
“Everything!” Vox said, exasperated. “You’re walking around half naked on a public beach.”
Y/N frowned slightly. “It’s not public. It’s mine.”
Velvette snorted.
Valentino laughed.
Vox paused. “That’s not the point.”
“It kinda is,” Velvette muttered.
Y/N tilted her head, stepping a little closer to him, completely unaware of how that only made things worse. “But I’ve worn stuff like this before.”
Vox’s screen glitched before he snapped. “Online is different.”
“How?” She asked, genuinely curious.
“That’s…controlled,” he said, waving a hand. “Edited. Filtered. Not—,” he gestured again, more frustrated now, “this. In person where anyone can just look at you.”
Valentino’s expression softened slightly as he watched him.
Velvette finally lowered her phone.
Y/N blinked again, and then smiled. “Oh,” she said softly.
And just like that, the tension shifted.
Y/N stepped closer to Vox and reached up, gently taking Vox’s screen in her hands, thumbs brushing the edge of his screen.
“You’re worried,” she said, like it was the most obvious thing in the world.
Vox’s screen turned a cyan hue. “I am not—.”
“You are,” she insisted, still smiling, completely unbothered. “That’s kinda cute.”
Valentino let out a quiet, amused hum.
Velvette smirked. “Called it.”
Y/N leaned in just a little, her voice soft but cheerful. “Nothing’s gonna happen to me, Vox. Promise. Just because we’re not in a high profile space, doesn’t mean anything is gonna happen.”
“You say that like idiots don’t exist,” he muttered.
Velvette rolled her eyes. “If anyone here is dumb enough to try something, they deserve whatever comes next.”
Valentino’s smile sharpened slightly at that. “I’d almost hope someone tries.”
“Don’t encourage it,” Vox snapped.
“I’m not,” Valentino said smoothly. “I’m just saying, it’d be entertaining.”
Y/N giggled like they weren’t talking about potential violence at all.
“See?” She said brightly, dropping her hands from Vox’s face and spinning lightly on her heel. “It’s fiiine.”
Vox watched her for a second longer, then leaned back in his chair with a quiet huff.
“I still don’t like it.”
Velvette smirked. “Good thing no one asked.”
Y/N then turned and smiled down at Velvette. “Let’s go get in the water, Vel!”
Velvette agreed and the two Overlords ran off toward the ocean, leaving Vox and Valentino alone on the shoreline.
For a moment, neither Vox or Valentino said anything. They just watched.
Y/N and Velvette had already made it into the water, the initial shock of the temperature long gone as they started splashing at each other like children. Y/N’s laughter carried easily over the sound of the waves—bright, carefree and completely unrestrained. Velvette, despite herself, was laughing too, though hers came out sharper and more competitive as she retaliated with a perfectly aimed splash.
Vox leaned back in his chair, arms still crossed, though the tension from earlier had noticeably softened. His screen flickered faintly as his gaze tracked Y/N’s movements—every spin, every careless step deeper into the water.
“Cute,” Valentino murmured, almost to himself.
Vox huffed quietly. “She’s going to trip.”
“She hasn’t yet.”
“She will.”
Valentino turned his head slightly, one brow raised as he glanced at his boyfriend. “Are you always this pessimistic, or is it just when you’re worried?”
“I’m not worried.”
Y/N shrieked as Velvette splashed her directly in the face, immediately retaliating with twice the force, sending water everywhere in a chaotic spray.
Valentino smiled, softer this time. “You are.”
“She’s not being careful,” Vox said finally, quieter now.
Valentino hummed, shifting in his chair so he could face him more fully. “That’s part of her charm.”
“That’s part of what’s going to get her into trouble.”
“And yet,” Valentino said smoothly, gesturing toward the water, “she’s fine.”
Vox’s gaze flicked back to Y/N.
She was laughing again, hair sticking slightly to her face, completely unbothered by anything except the immediate fun in front of her. Velvette shoved her lightly, and Y/N nearly lost her footing, only to grab onto her and drag her down with her into the water. Both of them disappeared under the surface for a second before popping back up, laughing even harder.
Vox’s shoulders relaxed, just a fraction. “She trusts too easily,” he muttered.
Valentino watched him for a moment, something more thoughtful settling into his expression.
“And you don’t trust enough,” he countered.
Vox let out a quiet scoff. “I trust what I can control.”
Valentino’s lips curved slightly. “And she isn’t something you can control.”
That earned him a look.
“Don’t start,” Vox said flatly.
•••
“Shok.wav!” Vox happily exclaimed as his pet shark rubbed up to him like a cat.
Valentino groaned. “Ugh. You brought him?”
“Of course I did.” Vox replied, “he would have been here sooner but it was his nap time when we left. I wasn’t going to wake him up.”
Valentino rolled his eyes, but there was a soft expression on his face.
When Y/N and Velvette headed up the sand, both dripping wet from the water, as they both noticed Shok.wav, and had two different reactions. Velvette groaned, sharing Valentino’s previous sentiments but Y/N squealed and began to pepper kisses along his mechanical body.
Once she was done, Y/N grabbed her beach towel and wrapped it around her body. “Who wants to come get ice cream with me? Velvette doesn’t want any.”
“I’ll go,” Valentino offered. “It gives me time to look for some new star potential.”
“Vox?” Y/N asked, turning her head to face her other boyfriend who was completely absorbed in his pet shark to hear or notice what was going on.
And soon, Valentino and Y/N headed off to the boardwalk and toward the ice cream parlor.
Meanwhile, Shok.wav nudged against Vox again, letting out a soft mechanical whirr as he rested his head against his leg. Vox absentmindedly reached down, running his fingers along the smooth metal plating. “You’re the only one here with any sense.”
Shok.wav chirped.
Velvette dropped into the chair next to him with a sigh. “If you say that again, I’m throwing your fish back into the ocean.”
“He’s not a fish.”
“Whatever.”
There was a beat of quiet as Velvette glanced out toward the water which was now calmer, without her and Y/N. Then she looked back at Vox.
“You were staring.”
“I was not.”
“You are.”
Vox didn’t respond.
Velvette smirked. “You’re so obvious, it’s painful.”
“I was just…observing.”
“Yeah. Observing her ass as she walks away.”
Vox’s screen flickered sharply. “That is not—.”
Velvette raised a brow.
“The only thing I was observing,” he finished, stiffly.
“Mhm.”
“You know she can handle herself, right?”
“I know that,” Vox said immediately.
“Do you?” Velvette leaned back in her chair, stretching slightly. “You know she’s not as dumb as she acts.”
“I never said she was dumb.”
“You’ve implied it. Repeatedly.”
“She lacks awareness.”
“She chooses not to care,” Velvette corrected. “There’s a difference.”
Vox glanced at her.
Velvette shrugged. “It’s kinda her thing. Life’s easier when you’re not constantly expecting the worst out of everything.”
“That’s not how survival works.”
“No,” Velvette said, smirking slightly, “but it’s how she stays happy.”
Vox didn’t have an immediate response to that. His gaze just drifted back toward the boardwalk.
“She still shouldn’t wander off.”
Velvette rolled her eyes. “She’s with Valentino. If anything happens, it’s not gonna be her that people should worry about.”
When Y/N returned, she was noticeably alone. In her hands was a generous amount of ice cream, topped with an assortment of things. And when Vox asked where Valentino was, Y/N only shrugged and sat down on a beach towel, saying something about “star potential.”
Vox would have to have a talk with Valentino later.
“Want some?” Y/N asked Vox.
“I’m okay.”
“Does Shok want any?”
“You’re not feeding him ice cream.”
“Has he ever tried it?”
“No—.”
“Then how do you know he doesn’t want any?”
When Valentino eventually returned, everyone knew where he had gone and why he disappeared. But nobody said anything about it. It was safer that way.
And as the sun started to set, indicating that their beach trip was coming to an end, the four (and Shok.wav) hauled themselves up at one of bars on the pier. They had ordered drinks and shared some laughs, but Vox (as always) was the first one to get drunk considering he was a light weight.
The drinks kept coming though.
It was enough for Vox to lean more into Valentino’s side.
Enough for Valentino to stop pretending he wasn’t enjoying himself.
Enough for Velvette to loosen up just slightly, her usual sharpness softening at the edges.
And enough for Y/N to start tracing lazy shapes against the back of Vox’s hand like she wasn’t even thinking about it.
“You’re clingy,” Vox muttered, though he didn’t move away.
Y/N smiled. “You like it.”
“I tolerate it.”
“We should do this again,” Velvette said, looking at Y/N. “But without the twinks.”
“I’m not a fucking—!”
“Can the three of us come but leave Vox at home?” Valentino interrupted.
“Deal.” Velvette agreed, “sorry, V.”
Y/N giggled. “We can come back tomorrow if the air’s not fixed. Or this weekend.”
“I’ll clear my schedule,” Vox stated.
“I thought you didn’t like this idea though?” Velvette asked, her brow raised.
Valentino gently played with one of Vox’s antennas. “He’s drunk.”
“Am not,” Vox grumbled.
And as the crimson sky of the Pride Ring turned darker, the four Overlords and Vox’s pet shark all returned to V Tower, only to crash once they all landed in Y/N’s bed.
