i've been to europe multiple times before and i absolutely love it. i visited my dad in germany for part of winter break and then i went back to san diego for a few weeks. i love traveling and i'm really thankful and fortunate that i get to have all these opportunities but for the past few months i've just been feeling so homesick like this past semester has just been hell for me. i just want to go back to california and be somewhere familiar and comfortable, even if it's only for a few weeks. i know it sounds like i'm complaining about going to germany, but that isn't it, i'm just sad that i won't be able to see my home for another year. i was so distraught for a while that i was actually thinking of transferring out of my university and going to community back home
sure last semester i would sometimes miss california, but it wouldn't be this bad. i think it's because at that time i thought i was going to be able to see home but now that i know i won't be in california for so long i've just been reminiscing so much. i know that going back to the past just because it's familiar isn't good, but for the past few weeks that's all i've wanted
i decided to stay here because i know it's best for me and i'll regret it so much if i leave, but california is my home, and i have no idea when my family will move back there during summer 2015. if they stay the whole summer i won't be able to see california until winter 2015 which is crazy to me. i just want to go home for a bit that's all
school is overwhelming me and i just want to see home and relax and get away from it all for a while. when i get really stressed i get anxious and i avoid everything. i've been missing classes and i have no idea if i'll end up having enough credits for next year. i have my meeting with my academic advisor on wednesday bc that's as soon as she's available. i wish it was earlier but it's coming up and i just can't wait to be able to talk to someone who can give me a plan on how to be able to handle this academic year. i'm pretty sure i'm gonna have to end up registering for the office of disabilities but that's fine with me bc i know i'll need it
so long story short i'm super homesick bc i won't be seeing california in like a year or more and school is stressing me out and i just want everything to work out
