Consent is important!!!
This morning, we found out the exact degree to which Ankhou understands the implication of having a choice.
His Dad and I were playing with him and after 'khou won a round of wrestling and was dancing on the back of Mike's hand, Mike got Ankhou's attention by repeating his name until he stopped dancing and looked him in the face.
Once Ankhou was looking at him, Mike told Ankhou that he wanted to pet him, and asked if he could.
Ankhou immediately hopped down from his hand and walked away in what was, to him, a very clear "No."
But he plays chase me games with Mike all the time, and his Dad may have mistaken it for that.
So when Mike reached out and pet him any way, Ankhou turned and attacked the back of his hand more aggressively than he EVER has!
He knows where and how hard to bite and how much to twist his beak to make a bite genuinely painful, and there is a drastic difference bewteen that and his play bites.
The pigeon son understands "Can I?" in no uncertain terms as verbally implying that he has the same option to accept or decline that "want?" implies.
He was sereous about that "no" and genuinely upset when it was ignored.
Ankhou didn't even want to play with Mike after that and absolutely refused to nod back when Mike nodded his head or fist at him.
When he flew around behind me to call me to nest with him afterwards, he bunted under my palm the way he used to when he heard thunder.
To the anon who asked about wow moments last night:
My pigeon son understands the concepts of choice and concent enough to be distressed when they are implied, but not honored.
New house rule:
Don't ask him if he can't say "no".
Tell him that you "are gonna" or that you "need to" do a thing.
Ankhou also understands "I'm sorry" to mean "I admit to having distressed you. I did not intend to, and I will not do it again on purpose".
So apologising to him is legitimately important.