#verbal communication

[loser-pet]

shoutout to all the neurodivergent folks whose verbal language alternates between:

eloquent and fully articulate speech, filled with emotion and detail. where every word is thoughtful and is strung together perfectly to prevent misunderstanding. at times, even using words that are almost unknown or wildly underused by normal people. where grammar and proper conjugation is ideal, and everything is in there for a reason. communication is fluent and flows smoothly between thoughts, and is not unlike a medieval herald recounting a message to their townsfolk

and:

short sentence. not much word used. broken grammar; no want to be proper. don’t want speak, but must speak, so little speak. sometime not even speak real word, sometimes garbled mismash of words. lots of umm and uhh and stutters. no tone, sound like computer even.

(I am that neurodivergent critter lol)

[thatpollguy]

Can you speak multiple languages? My sister can, and I think it's really cool!

Thanks for the poll request, anonymous! I think your sister sounds very cool, and I wish I could speak a second language (specifically Japanese!). Keep 'em coming, folks.

Can you speak multiple languages? [Note: Include sign language. Do not include braille.]

Yes, I am multilingual and fluent in 4 or more languages

Yes, I am trilingual (fluent in 3 languages)

Yes, I am bilingual (fluent in 2 languages)

No, I am monolingual/unilingual (fluent in 1 language)

Voting ended onApr 30

[kingsl3y7530]

the thing about me is that i just can't talk

[irrepressible-domovoy]

One of the things that most people don't talk about with autism is communication problems.

Sure, they talk about whether or not you can talk but no one ever talks about the other issues like if you are comfortable talking or how communication, just like autism itself, is a huge spectrum.

I know I hate talking out loud, but I'm fine speaking in written form. It's awful and complicated and makes me feel like every sound is making my ears vibrate like a drum. But I can talk, so no one ever sees it as a problem that I will progressively get more and more angry and short if you keep talking to me. (I've even been known to disassociate) And this isn't just with strangers, but it applies to people I know and love.

But no one cares, even some other autistics, because "you can do it, so you should." Usually this is because it just makes it easier on everyone else.

There is a special kind of ableism that a lot of us have where the only thing that matters is being able to do things the "correct" way (read: the socially approved way) and if you don't there's punishment. It's the same thing that makes some ambulatory wheelchair users or part-time cane/walker users not use their tools, even if it means less pain and suffering in the long run.

[tiredoflyme]

Why, because I'm on the spectrum, am I the one who's always in the wrong when I feel insulted by the words of others? Why is it that I'm the one who is misunderstanding instead of the other person not expressing themselves well enough? Why does their lack of intent to hurt matter more than the fact that their words hurt me? I'm so sick of this twisted double standard being used against me.

[clownrecess]

I has related question: do you know and if so are you willing to educate me on the difference between nonspeaking, nonverbal, and mute? and the respective "selective" variants of the three?

Nonverbal and nonspeaking have two different interpretations. Some people think of them as meaning the same thing, and others don't. I see both sides but personally do not like being called nonverbal very much because of this reason.

Nonverbal/nonspeaking are not umbrella terms, despite so many using it as such. Nonspeaking and nonverbal means always mute. It is not a word that can be used to describe a temporary experience. It is a word to describe the permanent or very long lasting state of a person.

Mute just simply means someone who cannot speak. Selectively mute means someone who is not fully mute, but goes mute in certain environments. I think it is important to note that the "selective" part of selectively mute does not mean "selects/chooses to be mute". It means goes mute in select situations. Some selectively mute people prefer "situational mutism" for this reason, to try and prevent that misunderstanding.

Semiverbal/semispeaking is also a permanent state, as nonverbal/nonspeaking is. Semiverbal/semispeaking is a term for a permanent state in which someone has an extremely difficult or restricted ability to use oral speech, and sometimes fully looses it.

Unreliably speaking is a term for people with apraxia, to describe their mouths not saying the words they want them to say. @perplexingluciddreams has explained the term in more detail though.

(tw! this next section has a mention of meltdowns)

Intermittently speaking is (I believe) a term to describe people who are primarily speaking but loose oral speech under severe stress like a meltdown.

[sayhoneysiren]

connecting with air spirit

1. advance your verbal communication skills. develop your verbal communication skills (words, speech, writing) and nonverbal communication skills (body language, laughing, crying, etc), to be better understood by others, and to also get a clearer understanding of other people as well.

2. bond. be open to companionship, friendship, harmonizing and building connections with others, as well as yourself. healthy friendships and relationships can truly bring out the chemistry of life.

3. create your reality. your word is the most powerful tool you have that manifest’s your reality. words are spells, so don’t curse yourself. speak of the heaven you wish to experience and you’ll have that.

4. don’t take life too seriously. be playful. be mischievous. be tricky. be experimental. be different. laugh. escape the drama. stay joyous.

5. take a different route. spice your life up by doing something different than you normally do. eat a new meal. drive on a new road. explore a new shop. watch a new movie.

6. learn more. when something peaks your interest, dive a little deeper and learn more about it. (ex: watch the animal channel. read psychology/spirituality books. take a class.)

7. teach. share your knowledge with others in a way that best suits you. (talking, writing, music, etc). being a mentor and sharing your spiritual knowledge and wisdom, can help assist others to a greater path.

8. be elusive. loose your self limiting perception yourself and just be whatever you want to be in the moment.

9. be innovative. forget the box you’re tryna fit into and create your own lane. combine and mix all the things that you love and own it.

10. find a solution. think like a scientist. there’s always a way to find a answer to every problem. try out everything and don’t be afraid of making mistakes, because in the end you’ll always have the solution.

[rollingstarmp3]

Reminder that us, autistic people who can speak, don't have to use semi-verbal and/or non-verbal, also "going non-verbal", if we are referring about losing the ability to speak in certain situations. Being semi-verbal or non-verbal is a constant state, it isn't something of certain situations, it isn't something you can be on one moment and not in the other.

It seems that a lot of verbal autistic people think that being verbal means we can speak just fine without any difficulties, that we literally speak all the time. But that's not the how it works.

can speak =/= having great communication skills

Being autistic means we have communication difficulties, even if we speak. And this means that yes, sometimes you can lose the ability to speak but it's an episode, not your daily life. It's a different difficulty and that's fine, you have to work with your own needs, that's the whole point of talking about autism as a spectrum.

But please remember

Losing the ability to speak in certain situations ISN'T THE SAME as can't speak at all or can't rely on speaking even if that person is emotionally fine and not anxious.

And no, not wanting to speak for hours or a day doesn't mean "going non verbal". It just mean you don't want to do it and that's completely fine. Even neurotypicals aren't speaking all the time. That's connected with the fact our social battery can go low faster and needs more time for recharge. Also connected with the fact that some of us only speak when we have a reason to do it, don't know if we have to speak at all and/or don't speak when we don't know what to say. These last three situatuons aren't the same as struggling with speaking, these are about struggling with social situations and verbal communication.

Also please but read what semi verbal and non verbal autistic people have to express. Learn about their experiences.