John perked up from his watching session upon hearing Barney’s familiar voice from behind him, who then sat beside him on a vacant gaming chair. The captain’s hair was dishevelled and dark eyebags were under his eyes. The mute captain glanced at his vice, raising his gloved hands to sign. [You still awake at this hour?]
That earned a slightly irritated huff from the other, who pinched his cheek lightly. “That’s m’ question for ya, cap.” There’s a worried smile. “I woke up to find ya missin’ from the side of the bed. Thought ah’ searched the trainin’ room for ya.”
The captain hands flinched a bit before slowly lowered them, looking back briefly into his computer screen that currently displaying a VOD of his team’s match during the last R6S major. He had a lot in his mind, mixed into a very complicated feeling that kept him awake for nights. He could tell someone about it, but he knew most of his team wouldn’t help him much.
Except…him.
He turned his head to face the other, raising his hands once again. [Can I talk to you for a minute?]
Barney raised an eyebrow. “I can spare some for ya anytime, John.” He swivelled the chair at 90 degrees, now fully facing the captain. “What’s up? Tell me anythin’.”
[Would you please stay with me for a lifetime?]
This, unsurprisingly, earned loud coughs from the vice-captain himself. Barney blinked several times before gently cupping John’s cheek as he leaned closer, his green-brown heterochromia eyes staring deeply into the other darker green ones. “Gordon,” he took a small deep breath, “I’d reckon ya jus’ proposed to me?”
An innocent slight head tilt from the oblivious captain with a questioning look.
Oh God, he’s still like a child. Barney internally pinched the bridge of his nose, exhaling as he letting go of John’s cheeks. The southern man giving him a warm smile, giving John’s hair a good ruffle. “Well, I can’t leave ya alone, sweetheart. We’re already this far to enjoy that normal life ya craved, right?”
John could feel his face heated up, flushed with a light red tint as he nodded slightly. The corner of his lips raised upwards unconsciously. [Then, you’ll stay with me?]
“That’s not supposed to be even a question, Gordon.” Barney scooted closer, head gently bumping against each other. “Ya know mah’ answer. It’s always a yes for me.”
As soon as his vice-captain said that, it felt like the burden in his head has been lifted and his chest warmed up with a slightly increased heartbeat. Fluffy and floaty, that’s what he was currently feeling and he enjoyed every second of it. His arms extending towards the vice-captain’s torso, wrapping them around and moved himself to sit onto his lap, head nuzzling under the crook of the vice-captain’s neck. Barney was caught off-guard, frozen in place as his hands hovering above John’s back with slight hesitation, face redder than John’s.
“....What the fuck are you guys doing, being all lovey-dovey here?”
Both John and Barney flinched and immediately perked up, their eyes now staring at a very irritated Ross. Mindy was clinging on top of his head, mewling adorably, unlike the grumpy gaze the ace gave them. Of course, the captain gave a threatening gaze while his vice-captain could only stutter in embarrassment. “Ross-- Wait, it’s not like what ya think--”
He massaged his forehead while grumbling under his breath before continuing. “I know you’re both dating for years, but my god please respect every single dude in this goddamn house.” A heavy sigh. “This is why we have fanfictions about you both from the fans and I don’t really like them much-- Well, Dean’s the only one who’s pretty excited at reading them all.”
“Ah...” Barney was at loss for words.
Another heavy sigh as Ross turned around. “I wanna make some formula for Mindy as scheduled for 2 AM. You both continue whatever you’re doing before.” And with that, the ace left the room, leaving the couple in silence once again.
Barney was about to take a deep breath in relief, his back leaned against the cushioned gaming chair when suddenly he could feel John also leaned against him, using him as a body heater. It didn’t take long before the vice-captain heard soft snores from the other, a sign that he’d fallen into slumber.
A smile appeared on the southern man’s expression. He gave a light kiss on the other’s forehead, before making himself comfortable and closing his eyes.
John trying to make cookies under Ross’ supervision. It goes very, very wrong. Someone please evacuate Ross from breaking down and dying please-
"Why the fuck you wanted to make cookies again?" John's eyebrows twitched upon hearing Ross' question, putting down their groceries on the top of their kitchen counter. Pulling out a box of instant cookies mix, the rattail-tied haired man paused for a moment to take a good look at the box and then to him, his usual grumpy face now had a hint of concern. "You better not burn the fucking kitchen like last time, I'm tired of eating outside and it's a waste of money."
He sharply nodded, eyes focusing at his laptop, its screen displaying a simple step-by-step to make cookies for amateurs using its instant mix.
He was determined to make these warm and sweet delicacies of Barney’s favourite kind; plain, dark brown sugar-infused cookies with chocolate chips sprinkled on the top of them. His long-time teammate’s birthday is tomorrow and he wanted to make the man proud of him for baking these bad boys, maybe even letting him help inside the kitchen.
(Looking at his captain’s inner flame lit up, Ross silently grabbed a fire extinguisher under the sink to the closest place he could grab on for safety measures.)
“Sheesh, can you not making that face?” He looked up from the screen, his green eyes meeting Ross’ unfriendly (not cold, just unfriendly) lighter ones. The ace frowned before he took a deep breath and passed the box to him. “Just check behind for additional ingredients. I’ll be helping if you break shit or something. I’ve preheated the oven so you couldn’t burn down this place again.”
(Looking out for his captain’s attempt to bake somehow made him nervous as hell. He decided to sit on a chair near the counter so he could immediately intervene if John screwed up on something.)
He gave another nod, his hand grabbed the box firmly and flipped it. He could see all of those needed steps and its wet ingredients. All he needed to do is to put a stick of softened butter and a large egg.
...softened butter?
He took a glance at the counter where Ross lastly put out all the groceries. Sure enough, a stick of butter and a carton of eggs were left there for easier usage. He grabbed the solid dairy product and squeezed it gently, his face slightly soured when he found out it’s still hard to touch.
How to soften a butter...maybe he could use-
“Cap, I know what you’re thinking right now from the look of your stupid face and no, you can’t use your damned crowbar to soften the fucking butter.”
John silently groaned upon hearing the ace’s blunt and harsh statement, but it’s true. Barney never let him in the kitchen when he saw John with his crowbar. It means that he needed an alternative to soften this thing up, but how?
(Ross saw how his captain trying to think other solutions to soften a single butter without using his favourite weapon and huffed in slight frustration. How is this so-called “FPS Expert” man also useless at normal things?)
“Use the fucking microwave, dumbass!” He could detect a bit of anger behind Ross’ statement as he pointed up above John’s head, at the top cabinet to be precise. “You grab a microwave-safe bowl from there and put the butter in there, then you put it into the microwave and use 500watt power for fifteen seconds. The butter will soften from the heat and you can use it for your stupid cookies.”
John didn’t want to admit it loudly, but Ross was being incredibly nice to him today.
He quickly did the things Ross had told him. Fortunately, Barney taught him how to use the microwave when he was still living together with his vice-captain, so that’s one thing he could do himself. As the result, he managed to get the butter softened and ready for use. He put the bowl on the counter and stared at it for a second before grinned widely and went over to his laptop screen for the steps.
(The sight of his captain grinning just for successfully soften a butter almost made him laugh out loud hysterically. Thankfully his common sense shook him out from that feeling before he explode from laughter. But really, he just noticed his captain is one simple normal man outside the gaming scenes.)
The first step; put all the ingredients into a bowl and mix until homogenous.
Huh, sounds simple enough.
He opened up the box and pulled out some packages containing the powdered mix and chocolate chips. With help from a pair of scissors, he cut the packages open and poured both of the contents into the bowl of softened butter. Finally, he grabbed an egg from the carton and tapped it on the counter’s rim, creating a small crack that he then used to easily cracked it open into the bowl without any mess.
He took a quick glance at Ross, eyes pleading for approval. The man looked at the contents of the bowl and gave him a thumbs-up, fueling his pride of success.
(...He swore he heard a slight squeal from John after that. A fucking childish happy squeal from the usually stone-faced captain of his. What the fuck.)
Now, to mix all of this...maybe now he could-
“Cap, I swear if you’re thinking about using your fucking crowbar to mix those, I’ll forever ban you from using the kitchen again.”
Welp, time to think of another option.
He scanned the kitchen for a stirring tool and his eyes landed on a big wooden spoon near the sink. With that, he managed to turn the pile of ingredients into a dough with no difficulty.
Perfect. Now to add my personal touch-
“Ah, sonovabitch, I need to make a call to somebody first.” Ross’ sudden voice startled him out from his focus. The ace got up from his chair and walked to the balcony while pulling out his phone from his bomber jacket pocket. “Be right back after this, and don’t put the cookies before I told you to.”
And with that, Ross was no longer in his sight.
...Is this means...
As if he was possessed, he ran into the pantry and grabbed a tube of tomato paste, a jar or dark brown sugar, and small can of sea salt. At the same time, he opened up the fridge and grabbed a can of Monster and cracked open the fizzy energy drink. He put all four items into the counter near the dough bowl and began to dump them all inside the bowl without any kind of self-preservation whatsoever.
A small laugh escaped his lips, and it’s not the good one.
(Holy fuck, why the air is getting chilly all of the sudden? Ross tightened his grip on his warm phone as he put it back inside his jacket and went back inside.)
“Yo, I’m back from doing shi- what the fuck are you doing?”
His head immediately snapped at the voice’s direction, eyeing at horrified-looking Ross. His signature grumpiness was replaced with a face of disgust and fear. “CAP WHAT THE FUCK ARE YOU PUTTING- OH FUCK IT SMELLS LIKE SHIT!!!”
He shrugged him off, grabbing an empty baking tray with a sheet of parchment paper and put big dollops of the “dough”, even he wasn’t sure if it’s still considered cookie dough, but he feels like he did the right thing.
(He bet his dumbass captain thought he did the right thing, judging from his slight pride smirk plastered on his face right now. Hell, he’ll put all his PC setup inside that fucking bet.)
Ross gritted his teeth but didn’t say anything else. John knew his ace was in deep stress seeing what he did but didn’t say much. Barney loves food with tomato paste and he saw an article that chocolate chip cookies are better with sea salt added. He didn’t know about Monster drinks in them, but he hoped that they’ll turn up good.
After finishing up putting out all the dough, He put them into the preheated oven and put on a timer at ten minutes, then walked away from his crime scene calmly, knowing that Ross wouldn’t do shit to his masterpiece.
(If he managed to find Barney before his captain did, he need to warn him about John’s freshly-baked death in a form of reddish-looking cookies with chocolate chips)
“Cap, I’ve put your crap in the cooling rack now.”
John’s ears perked up upon hearing Ross’ voice and hurriedly blitzed from the sofa to the kitchen, eyes sparkled with delight. He could smell the sweet scent of the sweet brown sugar, along with the tomato paste and the overpowering Monster. To be honest, it’s not too bad of a smell.
(OH SHIT OH FUCK THE SMELL IS SO FUCKING HORRIBLE, BARNEY PLEASE COME HOME-)
“Oh, you looked so damn proud of yourself for not burning the kitchen.” The ace commented, putting all of the dirty dishes into the dishwasher and turned it on. “Those craps better not be deadly or I’ll call the poison control crew.”
The captain slightly nodded his head, a small doubt landed on his mind. What if the taste wasn’t as good? He shook out those thoughts and focusing on those normal-looking reddish-coloured cookies. From a first glance, people might think these were just a batch of red velvet cookies with chocolate chips until they got a whiff of the smell.
Yeah, he needed a guinea pig to taste test one of them.
And the perfect candidate is just staring back at him with his usual grumpy face.
(...Why he felt like death is visiting him?)
“...What are you staring a- HURMPK!”
(WAITWHATTHEFU- Holy fuck he could see his entire life flashes before his eyes-)
With a speed of Lion’s EE-One-D*, John snatched one of the cookies and stuffed it into Ross’ mouth, which then the ace instinctively chew and swallow. His eyes widened and he seems to freeze for a moment before he dropped down to the floor and passed out.
...Is he dead? Did he just kill a man with food? Should he call an ambulance?
“Hey, I’m home- what the hell is happenin’ here?”
John froze when he heard that Southern-accented voice and slowly turned his head towards the source of the voice. Barney was standing near the counter, his brown-green heterochromia irides* eyes staring at them like he’d found a crime scene.
Well, he’s not wrong, it looks like a crime scene.
And he needed to silence the witness.
“...Gordon? Why are holding that cookie- URK!”
Like Ross, he stuffed his weapon to the vice’s mouth and made him writhe in disgust first before meeting his fate like his other unconscious teammate.
.
It was a usual Monday at the team’s apartment, with an addition of the team’s duo chef banned John from using the kitchen ever again, and the reddish-coloured cookies got disposed in an open dumpster fire and forever gone from their sight.
- Lion’s EE-One-D: Basically a gadget from R6S’s attacker Lion, used to detect enemies by movements and its detection is almost instantaneous.
- Heterochromia Irides/Segmental Heterochromia: When a patch of a different color appears in one iris. In Barney’s case, he got a patch of green on both of his brown irises.
DS- Okay I really must be going now but it's lovely to talk with you John. And tell Ross that interdimensional chat rooms with alternate versions of yourself is not a good substitute for therapy or good therapy in general. I must go before, Someone, decides to try diving off the roof again. I will see you in the chat later Friend.
Hawkeye01: “DEAN RECOMMENDED THAT CHAT SO I COULD BE OPEN TO SOMEBODY, WHAT’S WRONG WITH YOU?!?”
Oh! Two lovely Gordons! Very lovely Gordons!! I would've thought you two were gorgeous, blooming flowers right in front of me if it weren't for your sweet voices <3 - Bee
