As I recall in the last act of "The Dauphin," Wesley was more upset that Salia had "deceived" him by not telling him she was a shapeshifter than by whatever other form she might have had. The Enterprise encounters new sentient species practically every day; I have a hard time believing that, in that environment, Wes would let a little thing like gender get in the way. I am 100% behind the movement for a queer Wesley.
I don’t think it had to do with gender, and was more about how Salia was a shapeshifter. That’s the sort of thing you probably want to share with any prospective romantic partner.













