#vsco edited

[comparatist]

exam stress and semester ending, with a lot of anticipation and void.... //edited.

[dakiryuu]

[03.04.20] ✧

ft a photo from my last frat quarterly -- they had a silent disco??

bonjour!! I hope everyone is enjoying ~self isolation~ and taking care of themselves. Sorry I’ve been away for some days -- dealing with me things and avoiding everything like I usually do.

I’ve begun to notice I’ve gone absolutely insane from human contact (or maybe it’s just my parents?) and have to isolate myself more aka hide away in my room routinely throughout the day. It’s definitely different moving from a setting where I had so much peace, quiet, and me-time, to a place where people are always asking me what I’m doing -- even if I’m just, sitting?

I’ve managed to meet with a dermatologist, which is super wonderful. I’m an a nice whole cocktail of skin treatments, and I’m already seeing improvements. I’m a happy bean. uwu

My garden is looking so cute!! I have kale, carrots, garlic, onion, and lolla rossa coming up so far. Even some of my microgreens in the house have tiny baby sprouts. I’m a happy plant mama too. :)

This time indoors is just like any other summer for me (lol life of an unemployed introvert). But it’s been a bit more reflective just because of everything going on in my life. I’ve been working to be more compassionate, and more forgiving. Working on myself and the relationships in my life. Through this whole forgiveness thing, I think one thing that has come out of all of the emotion is my wish for happiness and growth for the people of my past -- and that they find peace too, even if they hurt me. I’ve noticed holding onto anger, regret, guilt, revenge, sadness, and heartbreak (to name a few emotions that have been haunting this past year) only pull me down and hold me back. I’ve realized that you just have to let them go where you’re at, and continue on with life. Even though it’s normal to stop and look back, I think it’s enlightening to know I am looking back at it rather than carrying it with me, and at some point it’ll be out of view... 

Anyway, apologies for the extended metaphor. Emotional spiel over. I know some people don’t often find times like these, when they’re forced inside and forced to sit with themselves. I think it’s reflective and allows for an internal exploration, which I think, aside from the ~saving lives~ and protecting our loved ones part, will be a valuable outcome of all of this quarantine stuff.

As always, if anyone ever wants to talk, you know where to find me. Stay healthy and safe x

[parchance-blog1]