#vulnerability-is-power

[wornbriefly]

Wanting to Obey

I still catch myself flinching at how badly I want to obey. Even when no one’s asking me to. Even when there’s no collar, no commands, no structure to lean into.

The desire itself makes me feel exposed. Small. Like I’m doing something wrong just by craving it.

I want to be told what to do. I want to be praised for doing it right. I want to feel someone’s pride in me like a weight, not a compliment.

And even though I know that part of me is powerful — full of choice, full of trust — some old part of me still calls it weakness. Still shames me for wanting to serve.

But the truth is, I feel strongest when I surrender to the right person. Not because I’m less than — but because I’m finally safe enough to let go.