It’s no secret: true, meaningful Christian friendships are hard to find.
In this fast-paced, superficial world we live in, busy schedules and deadlines seem to swallow up the energy and interest needed to invest into a deeper relationship with someone. But that doesn’t stop the majority of us from longing for that special bond.
The blessing of a Christian friend is even more profound due to sharing the Faith of the Gospel. Not only are we friends, but, more importantly, we are siblings in Christ; sisters and brothers who are striving to become women and men after God’s own heart.
This wonderful spiritual unity is able to draw two people into an unbelievably deep, meaningful and lasting relationship. It is without a doubt one of the biggest blessings one can receive.
Of course, still living in this sinful world, our relationship will never be perfect; there will always be rocky roads along the way.
For those times there are three important aspects to keep in mind:
1. Realistic and forgiving expectations
2. Caring and gentle admonitions
3. Christ at the centre
In our friendships we should always be aware that there are bound to be times where we make mistakes and hurt one another’s feelings. That is, unfortunately, the consequence of the ever present sin in our hearts.
If we say we have no sin, we deceive ourselves, and the truth is not in us. (1 John 1:8)
Keeping this in mind, reminding ourselves that we are both imperfect people and that our ultimate joy and satisfaction is found in the Lord helps us immensely. By doing so, we ensure and create a willingness to forgive and a higher level of understanding for one another. Our example should always be Christ’s bountiful and merciful forgiveness, through which we too can forgive.
Bear with each other and forgive one another if any of you has a grievance against someone. Forgive as the Lord forgave you. (Colossians 3:13)
Of course this is also connected to caring and gentle admonition. Small annoyances and unclarified frictions can ruin a relationship. These confrontations are often difficult, but they are necessary for the friendship to develop and grow stronger. In all of the encounters though, we should make an effort to speak in love, understanding and compassion.
Put on then, as God’s chosen ones, holy and beloved, compassionate hearts, kindness, humility, meekness, and patience, bearing with one another and, if one has a complaint against another, forgiving each other; as the Lord has forgiven you, so must you also forgive. (Colossians 3:12-13)
Lastly our focus and our friendship’s solid ground must be the Lord Jesus Christ. He is the glue that keeps us together, and it is the joined Faith in the Gospel that connects us on a spiritual level. With Christ at the centre, our friendships become of eternal value.
That means that we should always make every effort to encourage and challenge each other with the Word of God, that we pray for each other, that we lead each other back to the Lord and that we seek the Will of the Father together. It means showing a selfless and sacrificial love for one another, just as Christ loved us.
My command is this: Love each other as I have loved you. Greater love has no one than this: to lay down one’s life for one’s friends. You are my friends if you do what I command. I no longer call you servants, because a servant does not know his master’s business. Instead, I have called you friends, for everything that I learned from my Father I have made known to you. (John 15:12-15)
I want to encourage you to invest into your Christian friendships. They are such a rich blessing. When you walk together, you can help each other in the Faith, and the walk becomes all the more exciting when you share it with someone like-minded.
Two are better than one, because they have a good return for their labor: If either of them falls down, one can help the other up. But pity anyone who falls and has no one to help them up. (Ecclesiastes 4:9-10)
Love and blessings for the week to come! :)