It’s been over a month and I can’t get you out my head. I don’t love you. Nor do I hate you. I wish my mind wouldn’t find any excuse to picture you. Especially not in my dreams.
I should hate you. You ruined who I am, and you’ve taken things from me that I can’t get back. People tell me you aren’t a good person. I should believe them.
You weren’t all that bad, but god I regret meeting you. I’m left a hollow shell of who I once was. I thought I’d never forgive you, but I’m learning how to.
If I could say one thing to you right now, it’d be thank you.
Thank you for tearing me apart from the inside out.
Thank you for taking advantage of me.
Thank you for making me hate myself.
Without you I wouldn’t have learnt how to hate myself. Without self hate how was I supposed to know how to love myself.
You’re a coward, you’re fake, you’re a liar and you are too scared of letting people know the real you.
You will never know how much I loved you, you will never know how much I appreciated you or how much effort I put into our relationship.
I will never get to say everything I couldn’t while we were dating because much like I anticipated, the sweet nothings weren’t worth the waste of oxygen in my lungs.
