I was honored when Brady and Cloe asked me to officiate their wedding. In the state of Maine you must be an ordained minister or a public official (ex. judge) to officiate a wedding. I paid $15 to American Marriage Ministries and was ordained a minister. (You may call me Reverend Mike if you wish).
I drafted a script for the ceremony and let Brady and Cloe choose which parts they wanted to do. For example, they chose to exchange vows, but didn't want the part where I ask the congregation if anyone objects. Likewise, they wanted to keep the ring exchange simple. There's really only one required portion of the ceremony, and that is the declaration... "Do you Brady take Cloe to be... etc., etc." Brady and Cloe wrote their own vows and to say they were inspiring and heartfelt is an understatement. Half the congregation was tearful when they finished.
The only real opportunity for creativity for me as the officiant is the invocation. I chose to use this time to welcome the guests, say a few words about Brady and Cloe and talk about marriage in general. I'm very proud of what I wrote; you can read it below the cut.
When friends heard that I'd be officiating, they suggested attempting to inject humor into the ceremony - perhaps by copying other funny wedding scenes like Mr. Bean's performance in Four Weddings and Funeral or the marriage scene in The Princess Bride. I played it straight however and the ceremony was flawless.
Mike's Invocation
Please be seated.
Thank you everyone for making the trip to this beautiful place. Speaking on behalf of Brady and Cloe as well my wife Beth and Cloe’s parents, Ken and Beth, we are honored by your presence. We are also mindful of loved ones who can’t be with us today; we know they would join us if they could.
As the officiant of this wedding, I have several official responsibilities. My most important responsibility, however, is to make sure that Brady and Cloe understand the commitment they are about to make and are prepared to keep that commitment.
I’ve studied their relationship closely and spoken to them individually and together and I’m pleased to report that they will make a great married couple. I say that with confidence because over the last 8 years they have passed with flying colors the Relationship Tests of Strength.
They have
Worked together. In fact, this is how they met; working together at the Indiana University Foundation and each secretly hoping for office hours which overlapped with the other.
Traveled together, including international travel to countries where they didn’t speak the language.
Moved to a city which was completely foreign to both of them (Boston) and have together moved from one apartment to another.
Supported each other through rigorous professional examinations (the CPA exam for Brady and the Bar exam for Cloe), which they both passed.
Tackled home improvement projects together, including relationship test, hanging wallpaper in a bathroom together.
Sheltered in place together; working demanding jobs from a small apartment during a global pandemic. They’ve even worked together to modify that arrangement at this wedding venue with just a few days’ notice.
And finally, with little or no discernable skills, experience, or appropriate equipment, they have gone camping together. Repeatedly.
As the married couples here will attest, surviving any one of these Relationship Tests of Strength is cause for celebration. And yet despite these tests Cloe, who claims that she liked Brady first, still describes him as thoughtful, patient, empathetic and curious. Brady, who thought that Cloe was just too cool and definitely out of his league, still describes her as compassionate, thoughtful and beautiful. Brady and Cloe are outstanding individuals, and they are about to become an even more outstanding married couple.
But enough about Brady and Cloe… let’s talk about all of us.
Each of our lives is composed of almost endless choices and possibilities. Some people like to think of doors opening and closing, but I envision myself walking a trail through life with paths before me – each decision holding the possibility of new paths and new destinations. Most decisions and events in our life don’t alter our direction very much if at all. What I chose to eat for breakfast this morning isn’t going to affect the course of my life.
Occasionally, however, a decision or event changes our course dramatically. These are the moments when I can literally feel the universe shift. That’s what it feels like to me. The universe shifts. Entire worlds of new possibilities suddenly appear while others just as suddenly evaporate. You know those moments… choosing what college you’re going to attend, starting a new job, moving to a new part of the world, the beginning or ending of a romantic relationship, the death of a loved one or the birth of a child. These are moments which are frozen in time and shine in our memory.
In my experience, the most extraordinary, universe-shifting decisions are the ones we choose to make together; those special moments when we choose to bend our paths to be nearer to one another. What we are about to witness in a few minutes isn’t just the universe shifting for Brady and Cloe; the universe is about to shift for all of us. Their decision, their commitment to love one another other alters the path for everyone here. Their paths will be forever entwined as will be the paths of all of us.
