It's not a rehearsal + zombietude
The other night, while we attended a dear friend's Bar Mitzvah - a coming of age ceremony for 13 year old Jewish boys - we had the great pleasure to catch up with old friends and meet new ones. One of our acquaintances was telling us the true story about how he had worked very hard, and very long hours to provide for his family... and how much he actually missed certain phases of his children's lives when they were little, because he was so busy all the time. One day, a friend came over to him - having watched Cal* miss out on his family life - and said "Cal, this is not a rehearsal". From that day on, Cal realised that there was a "one-time-only" ticket to many things in life. Kids grow up, partners change, the world turns, the seasons pass, and where were we? Where ARE we? Today we have many distractions, many excuses, much "busy ness", pressure, shame, contingencies, etc. But our children, our family, our friends, our neighbours... they exist right there next to us. It's up to us to wake up and see and feel. Feel their presence (or absence), see their lives unfold, and choose to be a part of it or not. We need to stop and ask ourselves questions more often. Choose to stop living a parallel life. There is a growing zombie attitude - or "zombietude" out here (yep, I just made that up). Who am I helping? Who am I hurting? Do my actions have consequences? Does my inaction/inertia have a consequence? What are they? Does it take a picture to unlock seeing and feeling? Do we need to yell for attention? Do we forget our mortality so easily? Do we need to wait for a tragedy to strike just before our eyes to wake up? How easy it is to live and close our eyes to our neighbour's suffering - and of course, our own... Perhaps we should ask ourselves as often as possible, whether what we are up to is a rehearsal for something else? What are we waiting for to become engaged in life? What are we waiting for to open our eyes and see and feel more? How can we be more present to our children, family, co-workers, etc etc? How can we take better care of ourselves and our hearts so that our actions have lasting positive impact? Maybe ask yourself some of these questions today. That's where the courage is right now. Until next time, be well. *Cal is a pseudonym to protect his privacy.