I awoke to nothingness, an all-consuming darkness which penetrated the mind and set it ablaze with terror. Twitching fingers reached out to the shadows, grasping for purchase, slipping through the deep blackness. Profoundly discombobulated and with my heart stuttering in abject fear, I could do naught but scream. Harrowing and hellish, my voice drew deep and long into the utter nothingness, the omnipresent darkness.
God, please, let someone hear me!
Light poured into the room, blinding and more terrifying than even the shadows which held me unwillingly in their embrace. The willowy silhouette of my God-sent savior, a creature of abyssal obscurity, stood there in the light as a nightmarish fiend to my fear-obsessed psyche.
“Max, are you possessed? What do you recall of last night?”
It was a man’s voice, the words spoken in an achingly familiar tone which simultaneously incited vague animosity and a greater affection within me, a bittersweet love, I suppose. Though I was wary, I was not afraid.
“Where am I, and who are you?”
The man came closer, shadows filling in the lines of his face, dark, pensive eyes exploring mine as if searching for an answer himself and unearthing none. “It is I, Alfred, your brother. Please, tell me you remember that much.”
Unfortunately, I did not. I was unable to reminisce about anything, for the matter in my skull which should have comprised everything which was myself was suspiciously vacant. I laid back down upon the bed, swathed in the covers, the pillow lush and soft beneath my head, and thought that perhaps death would be an amicable alternative to this abysmal state of incognizance. “Max,” cautiously Alfred spoke, his brows deeply furrowed and eyes sorrowful when I looked at him. “Your name is Maximilian Rothbard; you had a wife, Vasilisa, and three children, Irma, Kasimir, and Liliana.” I looked at him in alarm, a strange coldness spreading in my gut. “Had?”
“They perished,” Alfred said at length. “In a fire, last night. Your mansion was left in ashes. The authorities found you comatose on the steps of the manor.”
No, no! How could this be? These people, I knew them, I could feel them, but their faces were emulsified to me, voices silenced. Whereas before there had only been paramnesia swarming my mind; their names brought vile and tempered emotions to life within me. I utterly loathe these people. The children’s names brought to mind feelings of dim resentment and some alienation, but the woman—Vasilisa—ignited an asperity so fathomless and putrid inside my heart that I feared it was all that I would ever feel again.
It diminished, and a small bit of clarity soothed my mind. The oil, the miniscule match, and the blazing fire. Oh, how I laughed, jovial at the inevitable demise of my despised family. The children had burned, the mother had reduced to ashes. Everything has been consumed by the conflagration.
All that remained were ashes and charred bones. My quondam decimated. My family, incinerated. But I… I was liberated. My joy seemed ethereal, for the past was in flames, the Cimmerian, truths of what transpired within that wretched hovel of a house eternally enshrouded by the resplendent fire.
I looked at Alfred, tears of delight filling my eyes to the brim. Empathy etched deep lines into his face, strong arms enveloping me in a compassionate embrace. I struggled to keep my laughter concealed, but it spewed past my lips, becoming chest-wrenching sobs. My brother’s blouse was soon stained with tears and mucus.
I was beatific. The nightmare was finally vanquished.