113 - The Deer - rodin
[Wheel One] - [House One] - [Card Three]
➽ Illustration: A fawn looks straight forward. The exact pose and species of deer can vary depending on where the deck's artist is from and what feelings they want to convey. Here I went with the typical deer-in-headlights type stare, as I thought it fitting for this card. The Growth is closely associated with teenagers and young adults, so I chose to depict a fawn instead of an adult deer.
➽ General description: The deer represents the aftermath of having tried something that didn't end up working out in the end, and all the complicated feelings that come with that. You were so excited and eager at first, but are now feeling deflated, defeated, and maybe a bit embarrassed. Perhaps there was advice you disregarded and had to learn your lesson the hard way. Now you're paralyzed by fear, scared of failing again. The Deer reminds you that failure can be a great teacher if you're willing to learn, and that you can't make progress on your journey without stumbling sometimes.
➽ Advice: Don't wallow in self-pity, don't try to over-analyze what you did wrong, or else you'll stay stagnant. Learn your lesson, take it within, strive to do better next time, and then move on. It can be easy to get stuck in endless thought loops, going over every detail that led to your failure. You might think you're just trying to prevent yourself from making the same mistakes again, but in doing so you end up staying still. You can't prevent every misstep, don't blame yourself for not being perfect. Look around you and realize that you're not alone, and that the world hasn't ended. There's always a new day and a new chance. The deer is a reminder that you were already brave enough to do it once - you know you have it in you.
➽ Warning: Don't let opportunities pass you by out of fear of failure. There's only one way to find out what the outcome of something will ultimately be. Things might not turn out perfectly, but the worst case scenario is just as unlikely as perfection, and either way presents a chance to grow and learn something new. By being so afraid of failure you're only setting yourself up for it. What do you not want to regret when you look back on this period of your life in a couple years?
➽ As a person: The Deer can represent somebody who tends to be anxious and shy and prefers staying in their comfort zone. They find it difficult to find their voice and express their feelings and opinions, and let others take the lead on important decisions. They might also want to evade responsibility for when things go wrong, but in doing so they lose control over their own life. Their anxiety might even turn to paranoia or conspiratorial thinking, causing them to isolate themselves from others. They might need someone to take them by their hand and bring them back into the light, so to speak, before their fear turns so paralyzing they can't get out of this spiral at all anymore.
➽ Finding love: The Deer might show up if you just went through a break up. You may need some time to be alone and regain your strength to find yourself again and figure out what you really want. Feeling disappointed, you might not feel like putting yourself back out there again, and a break like that might be just what you need right now. But don't close yourself off from love forever out of fear that it won't work out again. Few relationships truly last forever, and transience doesn't make something worthless. Be open to all kinds of connections, even small ones can be very meaningful and fulfilling.
➽ Holding love: In relationships, this card can represent trust issues, and important matters that aren't being discussed. Are there questions you want to ask but don't, out of fear for how the other person might react? Do you fear that your partner is hiding something from you, or are you the one keeping secrets? Sometimes it's easier to just go along with the status quo and not rock the boat. But if it's not fulfilling anymore, it might be time to seriously reassess the situation, no matter how scary the future might look. If you feel trapped, what do you need to do to regain your freedom?
➽ Spirituality: You might feel insecure in your practices, like you're not doing it correctly, or not doing it to a satisfactory degree. But is there really a wrong way to worship? Are you afraid of disappointing the gods the same way you've disappointed others, or been disappointed? Your magical abilities suffer from your diffidence, you must get over this notion of "correctness" if you want to strengthen them again. It will be difficult and messy, and others may try to tell you to do it differently, but only you can know what works for you. The gods will accept your honest hard work and commitment, even if it might look a bit unusual to other people.
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