Lately, a lot of reflecting has taken place. Realizing I fucked up quite a few times in delivery of my love with someone who aided in my healing process, radiated what true love was and having security, comfort. Someone to come home to. Someone who listened, went down with me in my lowest lows. Someone who stood by me and aided me with my demons when dreams felt so real and hit home, when all I felt like was escaping. Tried to build me up to my highest highs. I didn't let myself heal myself. I gree dim sad, hopeless. I let outside forces fill up my insides and I didnt think of how it would hurt. I've been healing and overcoming. I know I am ever-changing. And when I am at my best, I am love. I am working to prove to be my best, and not just for someone else but for me. So much of my life has been a self-sabotage, jumping ship at whatever risk I could possibly overcome, and being burned by things and people who were worth my time. There is a lesson at the end of every fire. This week I finally received not only an apology but closure from my first abuser. I cried almost rivers all week and I wore my onesie for 3 days in a row (including today when I got off work). I went and saw moonlight with a friend and felt so connected with the cinematic experience and black boy love. I am on a shamanic journey, my ancestors and some fam have been aiding me to take my time. In order to heal others, I must first heal myself. Patience is key. And I'm working to be a leaf that becomes the branch, that hopefully becomes an everlasting tree. #growth #abundance #self worth #whoamiwithoutyou #ancestors #guides #direction #spirituality #healing #journeying #willowtree #selflove #recovery #atyourbest #youarelove #aaliyah #possibilities #patience #youarethekey
