#whywedontsleep

[fosterateentheysaid]

Girlchild at noon.:  *sleeping in a heap, mumbling incoherent anger-bleats if disturbed*

Girlchild at midnight: "Sarah, do we have a ratchet? I want to disassemble my bed." 

𝗨𝗽𝗱𝗮𝘁𝗲: I just heard the power drill start. Back out of bed I get.

[fosterateentheysaid]

And then ten minutes after good nights, they are both on my bed. One is trying to catch a cat and the other is trying to catch her brother. They are shrieking and laughing. Boychild is trying to hide behind me to escape girlchild, who tells him,  "See? Good job hanging with Sarah and not being an a**hole." A picture frame is knocked down and all the cats are hiding under the bed. The house is warm and full.

[fosterateentheysaid]

Parenting a teen is being awoken at one in the morning by a sparkly-eyed, slightly manic kid who wants you to know that she might want to be a dental hygienist when she grows up.

[fosterateentheysaid]

"Sarah? Do you think we've ever bought milk from the same cow twice?"

[fosterateentheysaid]

I fell asleep without giving my kid her melatonin. Long story short, it's 5 a.m. and she, having not slept at all yet, is laying sideways on her bed, head hanging off the side, trying to decide which Nickelodeon cartoon characters are having affairs with which other Nickelodeon cartoon characters. I've slept, but I must still be tired, because I think she's making a compelling argument about a few of these.

[fosterateentheysaid]

Me: *lowers lights, limits screen time, makes up bed, puts on sleep podcast, adjusts room temperature, tucks girlchild into bed*

Me: *leaves the room for 11 seconds*

Me: *comes back to find overhead lights on, sleep podcast off, and Girlchild standing in front of the mirror, inexplicably wrapping a sock around a chunk of her hair*

Me: ...

Girlchild: "I'm braiding socks into my hair."

Me: ...

Girlchild: "Don't you want to know why?"

Me: "Do I?"

Girlchild: "It's so that someday, when my child asks me what I've accomplished in my life, I can say with confidence that I once braided socks into my hair."