Chapter Fifty-Four: Merlot.
Summary: Wilhemina Venable felt it was finally time to leave Kineros Robotics and get a job with people who weren’t such morons like Jeff and Mutt. What she didn’t expect, however, was for her new boss to be so damn insufferable. She didn’t expect to fall in love with her, either.
Tag List: @mayfair-fleur @mistysswampmud @paulsonsratched @msvenablx @notmeellaannyy @rwoolfe @golddustdykes @lovingsarah @slut-for-sarah @geinobinarie (message me to be added if interested!)
A/N: Surprise, bitch. I bet you thought you'd seen the last of me.
Thank God. Chuckling, Wilhemina nodded. Both of her hands now caressed Billie Dean’s back. Brown eyes stared at the woman on top of her, with lips red, breath labored, pupils dilated… angel. Venable desperately wished she could just go and be a normal person, a normal adult in love with another. I have never been normal. She blinked. “Let me go get it.” Wilhemina lovingly pecked Billie one more time before she began to get up, lip caught between her teeth, face scrunching up with tears out of nowhere. Quickly, she walked to the kitchen.
Billie Dean was left on the couch with her heart aching and her breath still labored. She gulped and reached for her hair, making sure everything there was in place. The room had grown uncomfortably quiet, even though music hummed on the background. She sighed. I don’t know what to do. No sound came from the kitchen, almost as if Billie were alone in the house. Is she alright? Waiting there and doing nothing was hard for Billie Dean, but also what if Venable needed a moment alone? I shouldn’t. But she would anyways. With steps that barely produced any sounds, Billie tiptoed to the kitchen as quietly as she could—thankfully, the door was open ajar. Quietly poking her head inside as to not be seen, honey eyes landed on Wilhemina quietly dealing with the tears that cascaded down her cheeks, one palm covering her mouth while the other squeezed the cane as harshly as she could manage, hips resting against the counter. Billie Dean’s own eyes grew misty. She felt guilty, even though she rationally knew she was not at fault. Gulping, Billie Dean kept on watching Venable; the way she took quiet deep breaths, the way she scrunched her eyes so tightly as to stop her tears, the way she looked down at the floor and shook her head in disbelief. “I’m so tired,” Wilhemina whispered, and Billie blinked twice as she hid herself a little more. “I just want to be normal,” Venable whispered again. Billie Dean’s heart ached even more, and as she kept on discreetly watching, Purpura jumped on the counter and meowed at Wilhemina, catching her attention. A teary smile spread across Venable’s features, and Billie Dean’s own face mirrored it. “You shouldn’t be on the counter,” Wilhemina whispered, hand reaching to caress the cat between her ears. Honey eyes paid attention to every single detail of the scene that was not for them to be watching. “I love you, darling,” Venable bent down the best she could and kissed Purpura’s little head. “Thank you,” she sniffled, soon sighing again. Billie kept on watching as Wilhemina gulped, tears eventually stopping but cheeks still wet. “She deserves so much more, Purpura… I wish I could give her everything I want to.” Catching her lower lip between her teeth, Billie Dean figured it was time to walk away. Making no sound yet again, she made her way back to the living room. A sigh escaped her lips.
“What can I even do?” Billie questioned herself out loud. She took a deep breath, sitting back down at the couch and closing her eyes, head resting against the backrest. How painful was it, to love someone who felt so poorly about themselves? It’s not that the boundaries were the hard thing, but the reason for them. How could Venable—the Wilhemina Venable, perfect in every single way for Billie Dean—see herself that way? Feel that way, cry that way? I need to learn more about her. Billie desperately wanted to help, but she couldn’t do it without fully understanding where everything came from. Does she even understand? Was it even her place to try and help Wilhemina that way? In the middle of such internal turmoil, Billie Dean only realized how severely the temperature of the room had dropped when her arms wrapped themselves around her own body. Instantly, honey eyes snapped open. She looked around. This isn’t normal. Venable had, after all, shown to be quite susceptible to the interests of the other realm. With the hair on her neck standing up, Billie sat a little better and kept her senses sharp. A thin gush of air flew by, moving her locks just slightly. Honey eyes kept on looking around, lips mouthing a silent prayer. ’I need you to help me,’ the thought came flying through her mind, a thought that clearly wasn’t hers. “I know you’re here,” Billie Dean said out loud. “Who are you?” She closed her eyes and took a deep breath. Nothing. “What do you want?” She tried again. Another gush of air flew by, this time accompanied by the smell of raw eggs and a hint of lavender. Billie frowned. A certain weight suddenly appeared on one of her shoulders. She gulped again. “Who are you?” She insisted. ’Help me.’ Another thought, this time with a faint voice. Billie Dean kept herself stiff, trying to understand whatever was behind or beside her. The smell kept on getting stronger. ’She does not know.’ “Who does not know?” Billie asked out loud. The weight got heavier. ’Her… my…’ Behind her eyelids, Billie began to see shapes and forms and odd colors; nothing made sense. ’She needs to know.’ Rain mixed in with the shapes, loud thunder clouding her ears and her ears only. “Show yourself,” Billie Dean commanded. An even stronger gush of air flew by. Honey eyes opened themselves. Nothing. “I’ve surrounded myself and this house with the power of the white light, you can’t hurt me nor anything inside this property.” ’I won’t stop.’ The voice was back again. The lights flickered. The smell intensified itself more and more. ’She… is… mine…’ Billie’s body filled up with goosebumps. “You’re not from this realm, therefore you no longer have any power or belong in here in any way.” The temperature dropped one more time, making it quite impossible not to shiver. Billie Dean gulped. “Leave this property alone.” ’Not until I get what I want.’ “Show yourself, then. Tell me what you need.” Honey eyes looked around, searching for any signs of something there. The lights flickered harshly, now. “Show me.” ’Supposed… to be… mine…’ “Nothing here is supposed to be yours, you don’t belong to this realm!” ’Will be known.’ Understanding that entity was hard. Billie could feel her head starting to throb. “Show yourself or be gone!” As the words left her mouth, everything suddenly went back to normal. Billie Dean blinked twice. Her hands trembled as she took a deep breath.
“Billie?” From the corner of the door, Venable frowned.
Honey eyes felt heavy. Billie’s body still shivered as she fell onto the backrest again, consciousness wanting to slip out. I’m going to faint. “Mgh,” she mumbled, for that was the best she could manage right now.
With her eyes growing to the size of the moon, Venable rushed to sit beside Billie Dean. She reached for her hands, flinching at how cold they were. “What happened? Are you alright?” Wilhemina was no fool; she had seen Billie like that before. The room is colder. She looked around. “What did you feel?”
Venable’s sharp mind never failed to amaze Billie Dean. She squeezed her warm hands, breathing slowly. Her consciousness still felt weak, so she focused on the warmth and the energy Wilhemina provided. Billie Dean kept on taking deep breaths. As best as she could manage, she scooted closer to Venable and leaned her head on her chest, taking in her scent. I shouldn’t be this drained. One hand slipped away from hers and an arm soon wrapped around her shoulders, caressing it.
“I’m here,” Wilhemina whispered. She’s as cold as ice. Venable caressed Billie Dean’s perfect back as she leaned to kiss the head of blonde hair against her chest. Down on her other hand, she could feel how tightly Billie held it. What did she see? Once again, brown eyes looked around; everything looked perfectly in place. She chewed on her bottom lip. Billie breathed weakly, eyes still closed. Wilhemina figured it was best to give her time and space.
After a few minutes, when Billie Dean finally felt like her consciousness had gripped tight on her once again, she gently pulled away and took a deep breath. Venable watched her attentively. “There’s something in your house.”
Fiery eyebrows moved closer together. Wilhemina felt the hair on her neck standing up. “What… what do you mean?”
“It might be attached to you, or to the house, but there is… something. Something different from last time.” Billie knew these waters very well; the smell of raw eggs was way too distinct from decaying meat, and while it wasn’t necessarily good, it was definitely not as bad. There’s lavender, too. It indicated whatever it was meant no harm, at least intentionally, and was familiar. Billie Dean bit her inner cheek as she thought. Venable’s eyes were open wide as she kept them glued on her. “Tell me… tell me what you know about your family?” She asked gently, cautiously.
Family. Wilhemina didn’t know what that word meant. She looked down at their still intertwined hands. How fucking dysfunctional can my life be? “I don’t know anything about them,” she answered, short and simple.
Billie Dean took a deep breath. She moved closer, reaching to caress Venable’s warm cheeks with her free hand. Honey eyes noticed how brown ones twinkled at the corners. This is so fucking hard. “What do you know?”
Gulping harshly, Wilhemina’s brown eyes looked away. Billie bit her lower lip. “I know I was a-abandoned by someone at the door of the o-orphanage I grew up in.” A tear slid down her right cheek. Venable still refused to look at honey oceans. “I had a note with my n-name and d-date of birth in it.”
Billie Dean nodded. She herself took yet another deep breath, fingers caressing the skin underneath them as soft as she possibly could. “Did you have a bracelet or… something?”
Swiftly, Wilhemina wiped a tear that slid down. She briefly looked at Billie’s eyes before looking away once again. “T-the only thing I had was a p-purple blanket.”
Oh. Suddenly everything made sense. Billie Dean blinked twice. She nodded. “I’m sorry for asking you all that… I just need to understand a few things so I can try and find out why that entity is around you.” Venable shook her head as she gulped the huge lump in her throat and looked down. Billie nibbled on her lower lip a little harder. “I’m here if you ever need to talk… you know that, right?”
Wilhemina knew, yet she didn’t really feel. After a lifetime of being alone, feeling like she had someone was hard. Logically, she knew; emotionally, how could she feel? “T-thank you.” Billie Dean nodded but didn’t say anything, giving her space to think. Venable let go of Billie’s hand to wipe her face clean, eyes down and still too ashamed to look at her. After a minute or two, Wilhemina looked back up. “Dinner is… is ready.”
That’s a no on talking. Billie nodded. “Can I help you set the table?”
Venable nodded.
In no more than thirty minutes, dinner had been served and finished with; they loaded the dishwasher and got back to the couch, talking about nothing at all as they finished the bottle of wine Billie Dean had brought them. Their nerves had calmed down from each of their turmoil, and the wine now fulfilled its goal and made everything lighter; after such an eventful day and week, they deserved a relaxed night with each other.
Wilhemina sipped the last of her wine as she stared at Billie Dean’s rosy cheeks. One of her legs had intertwined itself with Billie’s as they sat down, and she could feel her own skin growing hot. “I’m glad you enjoyed dinner.”
“It was delicious,” Billie Dean hummed. She sat her empty glass back on the center table, honey eyes never once leaving brown ones. She looks ravishing like that… Red really complimented Venable’s features.
“The wine was a great choice.” Taking a deep breath, Wilhemina allowed herself to relax on the couch. Purpura lay asleep on the armchair at the corner of the room, snoring lowly. Music still hummed on the background, a faint buzz.
“It went perfectly with the chicken, didn’t it?” Billie licked her lips as Venable hummed in agreement. In her tipsy state, Billie Dean couldn’t help but stare at Wilhemina; at her relaxed eyes, her moist red lips, her crimson cheeks —all courtesy of the Rothschild. The light was low and yellow now, giving them a more informal atmosphere. Why was that entity here? The question popped inside Billie’s mind; she decided to ignore it. Let them have at least a single night to forget about all the sorrows.
“Would you like more wine?” Wilhemina asked softly. More wine couldn’t hurt right now, right? She was in the company of Billie Dean, nothing could hurt or happen right now. I shouldn’t lose control. But control had already been given up when she allowed that woman to enter her life and mess with her heart like she already had. Billie is safe. Besides, she could use the quietness of her nerves after her little show to herself in the kitchen earlier. I just want to be normal.
Billie Dean nodded. “Sure.”
“Alright.”
Honey eyes watched as Venable disappeared into the kitchen once again. Billie bit her lower lip and let her head fall back on the headrest of the couch, sight fixated on the ceiling. She took a deep breath. Her ass is looking delicious in those trousers. The thought caught her off guard. Billie Dean chuckled to herself. Alright, take it easy with the wine.
“It’s not as fancy as Rothschild, but it should do,” Wilhemina’s voice cut the humming of the song. Billie sat back up and smiled at her. She’s so fucking beautiful. Venable’s chest fluttered deliciously. “I got us some bonbons as well.”
“That’s perfect.” As Venable sat back down, Billie Dean already held both of their glasses up. Carefully, Wilhemina poured them more wine before resting back and taking a sip. Billie did the same, eyes never leaving Venable. “This is good,” Billie Dean hummed. She reached for a piece of chocolate and popped it into her mouth, feeling as it melted right on her tongue. “Mm…”
“I’m glad you like it.” Wilhemina sat her glass back down, crossing her legs as she relaxed. The sound Billie Dean made caused the hair on her neck to stand up. She bit her inner cheek and reached for a bonbon as well. “Are you more of a dark or white chocolate kind of person?”
“Is it too bad if I say white?” Billie grimaced playfully. Venable let out a small chuckle and shook her head, reaching to take another sip. “I know it’s technically not chocolate, but I love it. I do like milk and dark as well, I just prefer white.”
“I figured.”
“Why?” It was Billie Dean’s turn to drink a little more. One of her legs reached for one of Wilhemina’s, caressing it.
Venable shrugged shyly. “It’s sweeter… like you.” Billie felt the corners of her lips tugging up. “I just figured you’d prefer it. That’s why I got us the box with all kinds.” I definitely didn’t need to say that out loud. The wine had clearly managed to loosen her tongue already. Thankfully, the low light hid the growing blush on her cheeks.
“That’s so thoughtful of you, darling…” Billie Dean smiled sweetly.
“I’m always thinking of you.”
With her heart fluttering, Billie bit her lower lip. Their eyes kept themselves glued on one another, sharing the same emotions. I love you, she wanted to say, I love you, I love you, I love you… Gently and carefully not to spill her drink, Billie Dean moved closer to Venable and reached to caress one of her cheeks. “I’m worried about you,” she allowed her heart to speak, for the words she wanted to say were not meant to be let out loud just yet. Wilhemina frowned. “I heard you… earlier, in the kitchen.”
Oh no. Venable gulped. She focused on the soft caress on her skin, fingertips as light as a feather as they traced it. “I’m sorry,” she nearly whispered. The wine clouded her brain and caused her thoughts to come in foggy patterns. She blinked once. “I didn’t—you weren’t meant to hear that.” Shame would have crawled inside hadn’t the wine arrived first. Her feelings seemed to flourish. Brown eyes grew misty. “D-did you follow me?”
Setting her glass back on the center table, Billie Dean shook her head. Please, don’t get angry at me. Wilhemina had set her glass aside as well and now hugged herself, shoulders shrunk and small. Billie’s heart ached. “I went to check on you since you seemed to be taking too long…” Silence. Billie Dean gulped. Her hand longed to reach for Venable again, but she knew she probably needed some space right now. I shouldn’t have accepted that second bottle of wine. Her mind felt too hazy for that kind of conversation. “D-did I cross any lines?”
Closing her eyes as she allowed Billie’s words to sink in, Wilhemina took a deep breath. A tear slid down her cheek, which she swiftly wiped away. “You n-never do, Billie Dean… I just… I…” Opening her eyes again, Venable could no longer think clear; she had too many feelings, too many thoughts, too many glasses of wine in her system. “I w-want to make love to you.” The words were gentle but still assertive, firm. Billie’s eyes opened a little more, positively taken by surprise. “I want you to see me, I-I want you to love me, I want you to touch me, kiss me… I-I want to touch you, I want to make you feel good. And I c-can’t.” Another tear slid down. “T-this morning, all I wanted w-was to give myself t-to you. Earlier, I j-just wanted to t-take you right then at this c-couch. And I c-can’t. I freeze e-every single damn time. I-I feel as if I’m suffocating. I t-think about my b-back and at how disgusting I a-am and I just—I just c-can’t move, I feel petrified. I want to be normal. I want to have a normal relationship and I-I want to be enough for y-you, I want to make y-you feel good… I want t-to give you w-what you should b-be receiving from m-me… and I c-can’t.” She sighed. And then she took a deep breath and stared down at her hands—surprisingly, they were not shaking. I need to stop talking. Instead, Wilhemina looked back up and to honey eyes; the movement caused everything to get a tiny bit blurry. Venable felt anesthetized, and despite everything, she was quite sure she saw nothing but something awfully similar to love in Billie Dean’s warm oceans. “I d-don’t think I can handle losing you… certainly not for being d-disgusted by me. And so, I d-don’t allow myself to continue, because I can’t risk continuing without you.” Once again, Venable sighed. Her head was spinning, her mouth was dry and she somehow felt like she needed more wine.
As Wilhemina reached for her glass, Billie gently stopped her with a hand on her arm. Their eyes met yet again, and Billie Dean gulped the lump on her throat as matching tears fell down her cheeks. Inside her chest, her heart seemed to be trying to escape. “I l-love you, Wilhemina.” It was visible the way Venable’s heart skipped a beat; she stopped in place. “Do you hear me? I love you, W-Wilhemina Venable. I a-am utterly and completely in love w-with you. I love you. You.” Without thinking, Billie reached for both of Venable’s cheeks; she cupped them. Down her waist, she felt the way Wilhemina now clung to her, holding her as tightly as she could. Their breaths mixed in notes of grape and tobacco. “You want m-me to love you b-but I already do. You don’t want t-to continue without me b-but I am the o-one who can’t continue without y-you… I love you.”
“I…” The alcohol nearly vanished from Venable’s system, leaving her senses tingling and eyes as waterfalls. Her mind went blank. She sniffled. “D-did you… do y-you… y-you love me?”
“Yes,” Billie Dean chuckled softly as she nodded. Her lips opened into a smile that reached her eyes, causing them to be even warmer under the yellow dim light.
Wilhemina couldn’t help but smile as well. She almost didn’t believe the words, but the way Billie smiled at her was enough to calm all her thoughts down. “I l-love you, t-too. I love y-you so much, Billie Dean. I… I love y-you. I h-have never loved anyone the way I l-love you and I realize I sound so a-absolute cliche and silly right n-now but it—“ a pair of lips cut her words. Venable closed her eyes as she kissed Billie back, slowly melting down. I really needed to stop rambling, after all. Their lips moved slowly.
“You don’t sound silly at all,” Billie Dean murmured after a minute or two. The hands down her waist still held her close, fingertips caressing her on top of the dress. Wilhemina gulped, clearly nervous still, and so Billie carefully reached to wipe the last of her tears away. “You give me exactly what I need… you give me patience, kindness, understanding… you give me the feeling of not being alone, of being seen and known… what else could anyone want from their lover?”
Nearly inaudibly, Venable whispered, “I-intimacy.”
Billie Dean shook her head. “What is more intimate than allowing someone to come into your life and settle themselves into your heart?” Wilhemina just stared at her in silence, dimple of worry back between her fiery eyebrows. Billie smiled sadly, thumb tracing Venable’s cheekbone. “Nothing.”
“E-eventually, you will g-get frustrated with me,” Venable nearly whispered once again. How tough could Wilhemina be on herself? It never failed to amuse Billie Dean. “Y-you’ll need more, and I might not be r-ready.”
“Do you really think I’m so shallow like that? That my love for you is that fragile?” Billie’s words were a shot in the dark; she knew they could backfire horribly, but she had to try and do something. And so, she watched as Venable frowned even more, cheeks tinting a darker shade of crimson that, even in the dim light, could be noticed. “My love, I would wait forever for you… I would wait this lifetime and the next if I had to. You mean so much to me, don’t ever think otherwise.”
In a loss of words, Wilhemina licked her dry lips. Why do I allow myself to doubt her? Guilt began to invade her once again, but now it carried no real meaning. She was past feeling guilty, she was past allowing her past to control her future. “I didn’t m-mean to imply I found y-you shallow,” she said after a minute. “I just… I…”
“It’s okay.” Billie Dean gently lifted Venable’s head so they were looking at each other again, for brown eyes had fallen down. “I know you don’t, but I needed to find a way to make you stop martyring yourself for something you can’t nor should control… I just want you to understand I love you, in the purest ways and in the most beautiful meaning of the word… I love you. Nothing can change that, Wilhemina.”
How can she manage to deal with me so well when I myself don’t know how to? Venable nodded as she gulped the lump that rose inside her throat once again. She took a deep breath. “Y-you mean so much to me,” she whispered. “I just w-want to do it justice.”
“You do. I promise you.” Billie leaned closer and lovingly pecked Wilhemina’s lips. It was a struggle, but Venable allowed herself to relax against them. I wish I could make all her turmoil go away. The world had done Wilhemina so incredibly dirty.
“Thank you,” Venable murmured against Billie Dean’s lips. My heart could stop beating right now and I doubt I’d feel a thing. She kissed her again, reaching to cup the base of Billie’s neck with one of her hands; she caressed it, pulling her closer. Billie Dean happily obliged.
After a kiss of two, they pulled away. Billie stared at Venable, eyes light with care and affection. “What is your favorite kind of chocolate?”
Letting out a tiny laugh, Wilhemina relaxed back on the couch once she reached for her glass of wine. Billie Dean motioned her with a smile. “Dark.”
“I figured,” Billie teased.
“Why?”
“It’s sophisticated, just like you.”
“Silly,” Venable murmured as she took a sip of wine. She loves me. She loves me. She loves me. Wilhemina felt suffocated in such a delicious way that left her all giddy inside.
Billie Dean laughed softly, leg bumping against Venable’s as her heart fluttered happily. She as well took another sip. I want to scream out loud that that woman loves me. That I belong to that woman. “I find it delicious to mix it with fruit,” she commented.
“Indeed,” Venable nodded. “Especially orange.”
“Oh, yes.”
Once the second bottle of wine had come to an end, both decided it was time for bed. They made their way to the bedroom with silly giggles, wine clouding their movements. As Wilhemina followed to the bathroom, Billie waited outside; she sat down on the edge of the bed and looked around, taking in the room that was, by now, becoming way too familiar. Her sight took longer than it normally would to fixate on things, which caused her to close her eyes and lean back on the mattress as she took a deep breath. Lavender invaded her lungs and nose. I want to smell it forever. After a second, Billie Dean got up to start getting changed; clumsily, she took her dress off, followed by her tights and bra. As she turned around to reach for her bag, Venable opened the bathroom door and took a step into the bedroom, eyes going up and body instantly freezing. They both stared at each other.